The Songs in Our Hearts: A Young Adult Romance(66)

“Of course,” he smirked, looking up at me. “It’s part of being young.”

“Yeah, but…what will all of you think if Micah and I…start dating? You, Mom, Josh…?” Really, I wanted to know what he’d think. His opinion mattered to me. All I ever wanted to do was to make him proud of me. Dad cleared his throat, a hint of warmth in his eyes.

“You can’t help what the heart wants, Charlie. A lot of things happened between your mother and me, but I knew she was the love of my life. Other people’s opinions didn’t stop me from doing what I thought was right. It was right for me. I’m not going to stop you from dating Micah. If you like him, you like him.” I could hear the sincerity in his voice.

I knew, of all the people in my life, I could always trust my dad to tell me exactly what I needed to hear. He never pressured me to tell him more than what I was willing to say. At times, it just felt like he understood me.

“Just be aware,” he said teasingly, “I will interrogate him.”

“I know you will. Thanks, Dad.” I laughed.

With Micah’s words echoing in my mind, I decided to “live a little.” My first love letter, ever—to Micah. I focused back on the notebook paper. Carefully, I began to formulate my words.





Micah,

I wish I could say all of this to you in person…but I can’t. I want you to know that you’ve come to mean so much to me. More than I ever thought you would. I don’t want to ruin what we have...but I can’t continue on with our normal routine without being truthful. You and I both deserve honesty between us.

The truth is, I’ve spent the majority of my time with you fighting off my feelings for you. When I first saw you from across the cafeteria, I felt an instant attraction to you. I wanted to get to know you. I guess it was a good thing Samantha started those rumors, or else you would have never spoken to me.

You’re probably wondering why I denied them… The night we were at Samantha’s house, she mentioned a name you probably don’t remember—Dane Wesley. I used to like Dane. Samantha was supposed to be a friend, someone I could trust, but she knowingly took him from me. Because of that, I didn’t want to feel anything for you…so you couldn’t hurt me the way they had.

A part of me feared Samantha would get to you, too.

When you asked me to hang out with you, I was beyond thrilled. When you danced with me at the fire hall, I felt something I never had before. When you needed me that one night, and slept in my bed, I knew it would be harder to resist you. The night you kissed me, I knew I wanted to be more than just friends. I wish I could feel your lips on mine again. I’m not ashamed to admit it…I want you. I would do anything to go back to that night and make you stay.

Riding in your car, listening to your music, living in this little world we’ve created, has been more than I ever thought I could have or share with anyone. You’ve opened up something new inside of me, and for that I’m grateful.

I like you, Micah. I do have a “crush” on you, after all. I don’t want to be “just” friends. I don’t know what this means for us, but I would like to have the chance to talk to you about it.

Since music is the way you have shared yourself with me, I wanted to do the same.

Enclosed is a CD mix I’ve created for you. Listen to it carefully. If you feel the same way…let me know.

After listening, meet me at the Grand Lakes Library, where we hung out together that one time. I’ll be waiting for you there until eight tonight. If you don’t come, I’ll know your answer. I’ll respect that, too. If you don’t feel the same way, I’ll understand. I know this only complicates everything, but I couldn’t keep it locked inside of me any longer. These songs will tell you what’s in my heart.





Always,

Charlie <3

(Here’s your track list.)





Songs from my heart





“La Vie En Rose” - Louis Armstrong: Although you suggested Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes,” and we both know how brilliant it is, this is by far my favorite romantic song. I thought it was only fitting to include something so personal in a mix like this. With that said, “We’ll always have Paris.”





“The Story” - Brandi Carlile: If there were ever a song that summarized me as a person, this would be it. It’s that simple.


“Somewhere Only We Know” - Keane: Every time I hear this song, I find myself thinking about the moments we spent in your car. The times when you’d take me around Grand Lakes, whether for a Mini-Mart run, to the library, to Samantha’s house, to a dance… Listen while driving down the road with the windows rolled down, as the sun is beginning to set. I suddenly feel like Kirsten Dunst in “Elizabethtown,” telling you where to go and what to do, by a song.


“Unchained Melody” - Glee: Yes. The Glee version. Stop rolling your eyes. If you don’t already know, I’m in love with this one. When I saw season four and heard them sing the classic, I had a Glee-fit. I know you’re going to give me a hard time about it later, and that’s fine—I’ll try to not go all Rachel Berry on you. Sometimes, I go down to the art room and hang out with my friend, Daan, and I always insist he play this song. I’m lucky he agrees!