The Lost Saint(46)

“I know, Daniel.…”

The only problem was that I didn’t know how I fit into Daniel’s picture of normalcy. Not anymore, anyway. Not with my messed-up family. Not with my close-to-zero odds of going to college. And especially not with my superpowers, which weren’t just going to go away. Daniel could never have a normal life with me. He’d need someone like Katie Summers for that.

“Then you can understand why I want you to drop all this nonsense about being a Hound of Heaven,” he said.

“But what I don’t get is why you wanted me to start training in the first place. You’re the one who made me think I could be a hero. You started me on this path.”

“I was just trying to make the best of a bad situation. But I was wrong, Grace. Gabriel is right. It’s too dangerous. I couldn’t stand losing you to the curse.”

“But you’re not going to lose me. I’m not going to change. And even if I did, you could save me. There is a cure—”

“But what if it didn’t work? It’s not a fail-safe. You can’t go about this thinking it isn’t a big deal if you change into a werewolf. There might not be a way back from that.” Daniel brushed his hand through his shaggy blond hair. “And it’s far too dangerous anyway. I don’t know what I was thinking. You’re no match for a demon.…”

Was that why he’d been acting so weird since the fight with Pete? I wasn’t able to fight back then, so now Daniel didn’t think I was capable anymore?

I was itching once again to tell him about the alley. About how I took down that Gelal in a matter of seconds. The only problem was that that story also involved a gun being pointed at my head.… But he had to know what I was really capable of.

Before I could say anything more, Daniel reached out and took my hand in his. “Gracie, all I want is for us to have a normal future—together. I don’t know if that’s possible. I don’t know if the universe will let me have it. I don’t know if I even deserve it.” He slipped his fingers between mine. “But I’m sure as hell going to try to get it.”

I looked down at our entwined hands. How could I tell him about Talbot now?

“Trenton applications are due in a month,” Daniel said. “Have you even looked at yours?”

I shook my head. “No, I’ve been too busy …” With everything he thought I shouldn’t be doing.

Daniel let go of my hand. He brushed my cheek with his fingers and then drew my face closer to his. He touched our foreheads together. “Will you do this for me, Grace? Can you forget about all this hero stuff before you get hurt? Let your dad and Gabriel be the ones who look for Jude? And let me help you get your Trenton application together?” He shifted his head slightly and brushed his lips against mine. His touch was as intoxicating as always. “Please, Gracie,” he whispered against my mouth. “My future means nothing without you.”

“Okay,” I said. “But you know I don’t make promises.”

Daniel laughed slightly. “Yes, I know. But I’ll settle for your ‘okay.’ ”

I found myself clutching my moonstone necklace as his lips melted against mine. His kiss made my legs ache like they did when I needed a good run. Every tingling cell in my body wanted me to climb onto Daniel’s lap on that bike, but he pulled away after a moment.

“I should go,” he said. “I’ve got homework and stuff.” He really was taking this college thing seriously. “At least look over that application tonight, okay?”

I nodded. I watched from the porch as he drove away, and then I went into the house.





LATER THAT NIGHT




I sat at the kitchen table with a plate of untouched leftovers pushed aside and my Trenton application spread out in front of me. I’d dug it out of my backpack, where it had been since I’d gotten it from Barlow last week, and broken the seal on the envelope. Mom’s evening-news ritual played out in the background as I looked over the requirements: portfolio of twenty-one works in at least three different mediums, two letters of recommendation, an application that would span the length of Dad’s car if you lined the papers up end to end, and two essays.

“Ah, Trenton,” Dad said as he came up to the table. “Application time already, huh?”

“Yeah.”

Dad picked up a page of the application and scanned through it. He made a low whistling noise. “Tuition has really gone up, hasn’t it?”

I nodded. “There’s something about financial-aid forms on their website. Daniel for sure qualifies, but I don’t think I do.”

“Hmm.” Dad put down the application. “We’ll figure something out. Your mom used to save part of her paycheck each month for you kids. We’ve had to dip into it a bit lately, but with Jude gone …”

Mom clicked up the TV’s volume. Apparently, we were being too loud for her.

Dad leaned in close to my ear. “Was she like this the whole time I was gone?”

“On and off,” I said. “Worse sometimes. At least she ate some of her dinner tonight.”

“Might be time to consult Dr. Connors again.”

The TV volume went up another couple of decibels. I rubbed behind one of my ears.

“Make sure you don’t leave those essays until the last minute. They’re the hardest part, you know.”