Sweet Liar (Candy #2)(88)

I swallowed back the hurt. That made sense, I supposed. It was why he wasn’t surprised by my living arrangements.

“She caught me up on the things I’d missed. Like the fact that you sold your house to pay for Theo’s treatment.”

I sucked in a quick breath. I hadn’t wanted anyone to know that. “Theo doesn’t know. Don’t say anything, okay?”

“I won’t. Don’t worry. She tells me it’s working.”

I smiled; I couldn’t help it. “Yeah, it seems to be.”

His hand landed on my arm, making me jump in surprise. Grinning at me, he squeezed, and I saw the same look in his eyes that was there when he first found out I was trying to help Theo. Proud. He was proud of me, and the knowledge made my whole body feel flushed.

I glanced away again as hope bloomed inside me. Maybe he still had some feelings left for me.

“So, our folks,” he said, changing the subject, his tone getting lighter. “They’re officially a couple, I guess.”

I laughed and shrugged at the same time. “I know. It was weird living with the two of them at first, but now I’m used to it.”

“Did you ever think that if they got married, you’d be my—”

“Yes,” I blurted so he wouldn’t say it. I’d be his stepsister. “If we were still together, we’d be an overused plot device from a romance novel.”

He gave me a sidelong glance. “If we were still together?”

His words hung in the air as he brought the Jeep to a stop in front of a well-kept three-story home.

“This is my apartment,” he said. “I wanted you to know where it was. I rent the top floor.”

I looked up at the yellow house with its white trim and small balconies on each level. “It’s nice,” I said grudgingly, wishing he’d told us sooner he was back.

Jonah turned off the engine and shifted to face me, but then he said nothing. He just stared at me with a heavy, crestfallen expression I hadn’t seen before and didn’t understand.

“So you’re really doing okay?” I asked, needing to fill the silence and the growing tension building between us.

Without answering, Jonah took my hands and pulled off my gloves. My fingers automatically curled into my palms as I gave him a curious look.

“Let me see,” he said, quietly but firmly.

I realized Heather probably told him about my surgery too. Sighing, I opened my hands and held them out to him.

Jonah gently took my fingers in his. I didn’t want to look at the nasty red divots, so I looked at him instead. My gaze followed the strong line of his jaw, and I caught a hint of the aftershave he wore, mixed with the clean scent of soap.

His focus sharpened as he turned my hands over. Suddenly I felt self-conscious, and pulled them back toward me again. “I know they look awful, but they don’t hurt.”

He wouldn’t release me. “They don’t look awful. They tell the story of what you’ve been through.” Gently, he rubbed his thumbs over the top of my hands. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here for you when you were going through this. I want you to know that I don’t blame you for how you feel about me. I understand.”

“How I feel about you?” I barely knew how I felt, so how could he?

His eyes closed briefly. “I walked away without a word. I’m sure you think I deserted you, because I did. When I walked back into your life tonight, I was hoping we’d see each other and the connection we’ve always had would still be there. But that’s not what happened. You just stood there when you saw me, keeping your distance and giving me a wary look that made my chest feel like it had been cracked open and my heart ripped out. It took so long to gain your trust, and I’ve lost it again. I don’t expect you to give me any more chances, Candy. I know that’s asking too much.”

His words washed over me, carrying away my doubts and insecurities. We’d misunderstood each other from the very start tonight.

“You don’t know anything,” I told him. “You didn’t lose my trust. You didn’t lose anything of mine you once had, and you have no idea how I feel.”

His forehead creased, and I could tell he was wondering if he’d heard me right.

“You’ve been gone for eighty-two days, Jonah, and I missed you every one of those days. The only reason I didn’t come running to you the moment I saw you tonight was because I had no idea how you felt. I thought you might be blaming me for what happened.”

He turned toward me. “I never blamed you.”

The way he said that, I knew he blamed someone, either my father or himself maybe, and his expression told me he was reluctant to say more. But I deserved an explanation. We all did.

“Why did you leave and stay away so long? Didn’t you realize how worried we’d all be?”

He sighed as if he’d anticipated the question and had been waiting for it. “I’m sorry I worried everyone.” Swallowing, he flexed his jaw. “I’m sorry I walked away from you, but you had your father back and I knew he’d take care of you. All I seemed to do was hurt you or get you hurt.”

“It wasn’t—”

“My fault,” he blurted, holding up his hand to quiet me. “Thank you for saying that, but my father’s gone, and I have to live with how it all went down.”