Summer Heat (Cruel Summer #1)(28)

Why did it matter?

A few tears slid down my cheeks. I wiped them away quickly. He was right.

God, I hated so much to say that in my head let alone out loud.

He was right.

I wasn’t feeling it.

I was afraid to.

Afraid of what letting go would feel like. I only trusted myself because nobody else in my life had ever been reliable.

Not my parents.

Nya was the closest thing I had, but I wasn’t allowed to visit her as often as I got older because my parents said it looked bad.

I crumpled to the ground and hugged my knees to my chest just as the mess hall bell rang for dinner.

With a sigh, I stood, grabbed my stuff, and walked at a turtle’s pace back to the mess hall to carb up since I had a big night ahead of me.

When I walked in, Jackson was already there, deep in conversation with a pissed-off looking Marlo.

Fantastic.

Was he tattling on me?

I couldn’t tell.

But when Marlo looked up, it was concern marring his features. I narrowed my eyes at both of them then went to the buffet line to grab some food.

I couldn’t even remember what I grabbed, just that I had food and I had a seat.

I numbly shoveled the food into my mouth and chewed.

Was there something wrong with me?

Maybe I really was a worthless bitch.

I had one job, and I couldn’t even get it right enough to show my campers. What made me think I could make it in Hollywood if I couldn’t even teach a few stupid routines without crying?

“Ray.” Marlo tapped my shoulder.

Slowly, I turned. “What?”

He nodded to the door. “Come with me, bring your food.”

“I’m done.” I’d had maybe five bites, but everything tasted like lead, I was too stressed to eat, plus I had some snacks back at my cabin. I tossed my food into the trash and followed him on wobbly legs.

I shouldn’t have worked out for four hours.

I just… I was trying to do my best.

It was still pretty light outside. We walked in silence. And then we were back at the HQ lodge for staff.

“Am I in trouble?” I stopped walking.

“Why would you think that?” he asked in confusion, holding open the door for me.

“Because you hate me. Because we like to yell at each other. This morning… There’s way too much to choose from at this point.” I exhaled roughly and followed him down the hall and into a bathroom with three huge trough-looking metal tubs.

Marlo smirked and walked over to the wall.

Two ice machines were placed there with bags.

“Noooooooo.” I groaned. “You’re not serious.”

“Dead serious.” He grabbed a bag and started filling it with ice. “You won’t be able to walk tomorrow let alone teach.”

“It’s not bad.”

“It’s worse than bad.” He tossed the full back of ice into the tub and repeated the process four more times.

I shivered just thinking about it.

“All right,” He pointed to the tub. “Get in.”

“Now?”

“No, after the ice melts. Yes now.”

“But I’m—”

“Ray,” he said softly. “Believe it or not, I really am trying to save your ass. Get down to your bra and underwear and crawl in, I’ll time it for you and come back in when it’s over.”

I clamped my jaw and peeled my shirt over my head. I figured the faster I did it, the faster he would leave me alone. I tugged down my sweat-slicked shorts and then kicked off my flip flops.

“Hate you, hate you, hate you, hate you,” I chanted as I lowered myself into the ice bath.

For some reason more tears came.

Along with Jackson’s words.

“Do I have a soul?” I asked in a weak voice. Utter silence. “Never mind, forget I asked.”

I looked up. Marlo’s blue eyes blazed with fury. “Who the hell told you that you had no soul?”

“Doesn’t matter. Is it true?”

Marlo sat at the edge of the trough. “No,” he whispered. “You have a soul.”

Without looking away from my gaze, he reached into the frigid water and pulled up my leg onto his lap and started massaging the arch in my right foot.

I cried out and stiffened.

“Better it hurt now than later in bed.” He pressed his palm down on my arch and rubbed.

I squeezed my eyes shut. “Does this torture have an end time?”

He chuckled. “Ten minutes, and then I’m walking you back to your cabin and giving you the night off.”

My eyes jolted open, “I don’t need the night off, I still have things I need to work on and—”

“Take the night off, or you’re fired.” He shrugged.

“How is that fair?”

He dropped my leg back in and grabbed the other. “I don’t want you hurting yourself. Take it easy, the dancing will come, so will the rest of the show. We don’t need to rush the process, Ray.”

“But—”

“Promise me?”

I nodded while he kept kneading my foot.

And then, once the prickling sensation of the cold water simmered to a numbing icy bath, he grabbed a nearby towel and handed it to me. “Have a good night, Ray.”