On the Come Up(27)

Boys in blue rolling all through my neighborhood,

’Cause I guess that they think that we ain’t no good.

We fight back, we’ve attacked, then they say they should

Send in troops wearing boots for the greater good.

But let me be honest, I promise,

If a cop come at me, I’ll be lawless.

Like my poppa, fear nada. Take solace

In my hood going hard in my honor.

’Cause you can’t stop me on the come up.

You can’t stop me on the come up.

You can’t stop me on the come up.

You can’t stop me, nope, nope.

I’m a queen, don’t need gray just to prove it.

Rock a crown, and you ain’t gon’ remove it.

Royalty in my blood, didn’t choose it,

’Cause my daddy still king and the truest.

Strapped like backpacks, I pull triggers.

All the clips on my hips change my figure.

’Cause I figure they think I’m a killer,

May as well bust them thangs, go gorilla.

I hate that my momma got struggles.

Bills and food, she be trying to juggle,

But I swear, I’m gon’ pop like a bubble

And make sure she don’t have no more troubles.

So you can’t stop me on the come up.

You can’t stop me on the come up.

You can’t stop me on the come up.

You can’t stop me, nope, nope.





Nine


Aunt Pooh never came back. Scrap walked me home.

I left her voice mails, texted her, everything. That was yesterday, and I still haven’t heard back. Her girlfriend Lena hasn’t heard from her either. Aunt Pooh does this sometimes though. Will ghost for a bit, then pop back up out of nowhere, acting as if everything’s all good. If you ask her what she’s been up to, she’ll be like, “Don’t worry ’bout it,” and move on to something else.

Honestly, it’s best that way. Look, I know my aunt does foul stuff, okay? But I’d rather see her as my hero than as somebody else’s villain. Can’t lie though, I’m pissed that she left me like she did.

I got the song done, Doc polished it up, put it on a USB for me, and that was that. No problems at all. But Aunt Pooh should’ve been there. She was supposed to tell me if a line was off or hype me up when a verse was good. She’s supposed to tell me what to do with it.

I haven’t uploaded it online. One, I don’t know what to do with it. How do I promote it? I do not wanna be that random person on Twitter, going into threads and dropping Dat Cloud links that nobody asked for.

Two, as dumb as this will sound, I’m scared. To me it’s like putting nudes online. Okay, maybe that’s a stretch, but it’s like putting part of me out there that I can’t hide again.

There’s already a part of me out there that I can’t hide. Somebody at school uploaded a video of Long and Tate pinning me to the ground. It doesn’t show them throwing me down or anything that happened before that. Whoever recorded it called it, “Drug dealer caught at MSOA.”

Drug dealer. Two words.

Since they think I’m a drug dealer,

Nobody could really give a

Fuck.

The video’s barely got views. It’s messed up, but I’m glad nobody’s watching it.

Trey peeks into the bathroom. “Dang, you ain’t ready yet?”

“Treeey!” I groan. I’m just standing here, putting gel on my edges, but who wants their older brother sticking his nose in the bathroom while they’re getting ready? “Do you know what privacy is?”

“Do you know what timeliness is?” He looks at his watch. “Church starts in twenty minutes, Bri. Ma’s ready to go.”

I comb my baby hairs into a swoop. “Don’t know why we’re going in the first place.” Straight up, it would take Jesus himself to make me go back to the same church that let me go. For real, for real. Even then, I’d tell him, “Let me think about it.”

“I don’t know why Ma wants to go either,” Trey says. “But she does. So hurry up.”

This makes no sense, I swear. Trey heads outside, and I’m not far behind. Jay’s already in her Jeep.

“All right, y’all,” she says. “You know folks will be talking about me losing my job. Try to ignore it and don’t get smart, okay?”

She looks dead at me in her rearview mirror.

“Why are you looking at me?”

“Oh, you know why.” She puts the truck in reverse. “Got a mouth like your daddy.”

Also like her. But anyway.

Christ Temple is only a five-minute drive away. The parking lot is so full, cars are parked in the gravel lot next door that the church owns. That’s where we end up, instead of in the church secretary spot that Jay used to have. They’ve taken the sign down.

Jay greets people inside with a smile like nothing’s happened. She even hugs Pastor Eldridge. He opens his arms toward me. I give him a S’up nod and keep it moving. Trey does, too. Our petty doesn’t discriminate.

We have a pew near the back that may as well have our names on it. From here we can see some of everything. Service hasn’t started yet, but there are people all around the sanctuary, talking in little clusters. There are the older “mothers,” as they’re called, up in the front row with their big hats on.