Mindsiege (Mindspeak #2)(43)

I blinked twice, three times. If I hadn’t been completely in love with Jack, I wondered what kind of pull the boy in front of me would’ve had on me.

When I pulled my face from his grasp, a grin spread across his face. He walked to the table where the gun lay, picked it up, and rested it against his palm. Never really closing his fingers around the handle, he stepped to me.

My pulse quickened. I stared at the dark metal, then up at Jonas. He watched me expectantly. I was sure he could hear the beating of my heart, feel the shaking of my limbs.

My eyes returned to the gun. Jonas let the gun slip and turn until he held it by the barrel, pointing the handle toward me.

Take it!

I shook my head and backed away a step.

He followed. He reached out with his empty hand and grabbed my arm, giving me no choice but to stand close. I followed the line of tattoos running up his arm until they disappeared beneath the sleeve of his shirt. He breathed heavily, like me.

Hold it, Lexi. Now!

I jumped at the boom of his voice inside my head. Slowly, I took the object from him, lifting it with extreme caution. I squeezed the handle without putting my finger anywhere near the trigger.

“I can smell your fear,” he whispered. His hand slid down and circled my wrist. Goosebumps spread up my arms. “I can feel your pulse racing underneath my fingers. And I can hear your short breaths like you’ve just finished a sprint.” He leaned closer to my ear, and I was sure I would pass out from his closeness and the fear of him I still felt. “The way you feel right now… that’s what having Sandra Whitmeyer as a mother meant. Being poked and prodded. Being observed, studied, and held prisoner in a life that you can’t escape.” Jonas’s eyes glassed over.

“Why didn’t you run when you had the chance?” I asked.

The corners of his lips lifted slightly. “Na?veté really isn’t attractive on you, Lexi.”

That’s how I knew. You couldn’t run. Just like I can’t, now. I pulled away, backed up, and sat on Coach’s sofa. I lay the gun gently on my knees and rested my hand across it. As easily as I could have sunk to my knees and cried myself senseless, I knew that was not the answer.

“When I led you into The Farm, then helped you escape, I pretty much signed my death warrant.”

I cocked my head. “What do you mean?”

“I showed you the most top secret government experiments in the world. I showed you into the devil’s lair and provided you with all the ammunition you needed to expose the government for playing with human life. How do you think the public will react if they discover just how many human lives are lost for each cloned human they’ve produced? Even worse, how do you think Americans will react when they learn that the government had discovered a way to control minds?”

I stared at him; my heart practically stopped. “You think they’ll murder you for showing me the facility and the other clones?”

“No. They’ll kill me for showing you the exit.”

“I thought their goal was to cure disease.” My breath got caught in my throat. I thought Jack and I were created to help people. Cure illnesses. Fix fatal injuries.

“That’s what they’ll want the public to believe. Think about it. If the government tells the mother of a child born with a brain defect that they can now make that child normal? Or what about someone who’s in an accident and wakes up paralyzed from the neck down? You think they’ll fault a government who’s discovered a way for that person to walk again? Even if they have to overlook the fact that the government uses that same technology in other ways.”

I stared at the gun in my lap. The heat of anger spread up my arms, across my neck, and to my face. Would the government truly do something that deceptive? And where did I fit into this?

Jonas knelt in front of me and covered my hand with his. “You get tonight to mentally prepare,” he said, his voice taking on a harshness that contradicted the gentle touch of his palm.

I lifted my eyes to study him. “Prepare?”

“Tomorrow, you’ll learn to shoot that gun, and you’ll learn to protect yourself. Both physically and mentally.” That’s where we’ll start, anyway.





Chapter Nineteen


Saturday morning’s swim competition came way too quickly.

Somehow I managed to win each of my races and put up times good enough to qualify for the next meet, but I didn’t score a single personal-best time. Not surprising, since I had spent so little time in the pool the past week.

The meet finished around lunchtime. I stuffed my goggles and swim cap inside my bag, grabbed my water bottle, then threw my bag over my shoulder. When I turned toward the locker room, I ran into a wall of a body.

Every muscle in my stomach tightened. “Jack, hey.” Feeling naked in my swimsuit, I crossed my arms across my chest.

“Hi.” His voice was so quiet I barely heard him.

“I’m surprised you’re here.” His stormy eyes sent a chill down my arms. I was shocked to see him after what had happened the night before.

“Jonas made me see the risks of barging in on the IIA before we’re ready with a plan.” He turned his head toward the crowd that was thinning behind him. Jonas stood near the door—waiting for Jack, maybe. Or possibly he was waiting to show me how to use a gun. I suppressed a roll of the eyes just before Jack turned back. Keeping his voice low, he said, “We need to talk.”