Heroine(86)

Also, it hurts.

Imagine that initial sting of being poked in the eye lasting for three days while your epithelium grows back.

To alleviate my pain, my doctor gave me three OxyContin—one for each day. I took the first one believing that nothing would ever make a dent in my misery, but twenty minutes later I was fine.

More than fine. I felt amazing.

I woke up the next day in pain again but aware that I could easily be out of it . . . and I freely admit, very much looking forward to recapturing the feeling of lightness and peace that Oxy had bestowed upon me.

I didn’t get it the second day. I felt fine, quite good in fact, but not equal to how I had the day before. I took my third—and last—pill the next day and was once again disappointed in the results.

Yep—out of pain, but . . . disappointed.

I later learned that this is what’s called chasing the dragon, an attempt to replicate the initial experience of opiates. People who are chasing the dragon raise their dosages in that pursuit, and while I had a very limited supply—three pills—I understood how habit-forming it could be after taking just one.

Opioids treat pain, yes, but they also allow the user a sense of relief and peace, something that people suffering from mental and emotional trauma are in deep need of. The ease of a trapdoor out of a sometimes cruel reality proves too tempting for many.

Do all opioid users abuse them? No. Plenty of people use opioids daily to treat pain, never sliding down the slippery slope.

The exact formula of what it takes to create an addict is unknown, but the debate includes factors such as environment, genetic predispositions, and childhood trauma.

I chose to write Heroine from the point of view of an addict because addiction begins with a single pill prescribed by a doctor, carrying no hint of illegality or allusions of shame. Many of us have been written that prescription or given those pills by hands we trust.

It could be you. It could be me. It could be any of us.

If you or someone you know struggles with addiction, please be sure to check out the resources section at the back of the book.

—Mindy McGinnis





Resources


There are many resources available for those struggling with addiction. Below is a short list of some of the well-recognized programs that can offer help.

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA): www.samhsa.gov

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) is an agency within the US Department of Health and Human Services. SAMHSA devotes its resources, including programs, information, and data, to help people act on the knowledge that behavioral health is essential to health, that prevention works, that treatment is effective, and that people recover from mental and substance-use disorders.

SAMHSA’s site features a treatment locator, a helpline (800-662-HELP), and a suicide prevention hotline (800-273-TALK), as well as educational materials spanning prevention, treatment, and recovery.

National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA): www.drugabuse.gov

NIDA is a federal scientific research institute under the National Institutes of Health, US Department of Health and Human Services. Their mission is to advance science on the causes and consequences of drug use and addiction and to apply that knowledge to improve individual and public health.

NIDA’s site features educational resources for parents, teachers, kids and teens, and family and friends of addicts, as well as resources for those struggling with drug abuse themselves.

NIDA for Teens (www.teens.drugabuse.gov) has the latest on how drugs affect the brain and body, featuring videos, games, and blog posts relevant to teens.

Narcotics Anonymous (NA): www.na.org

NA is a nonprofit society of people for whom drugs have become a major problem. Recovering addicts meet regularly to help each other stay clean.

NA’s site features literature about the program as well as a meeting locator.

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA): www.aa.org

AA is an international fellowship for people who have had a drinking problem. It is nonprofessional, self-supporting, multiracial, apolitical, and available almost everywhere. There are no age or education requirements. Membership is open to anyone who wants to do something about their drinking problem.

AA’s site features program information, video and audio PSAs, as well as a meeting locator.

Al-Anon & Alateen: www.al-anon.org

These groups offer help and hope for families and friends of alcoholics. Al-Anon and Alateen members are people who have been affected by someone else’s drinking. They are parents, children, spouses, partners, brothers, sisters, other family members, friends, employers, employees, and coworkers of alcoholics.

The site offers an FAQ, a First Steps podcast, member resources, and locators for both Al-Anon and Alateen meetings.

Self-Management and Recovery Training (SMART Recovery): www.smartrecovery.org

SMART Recovery is an abstinence-based, not-for-profit organization with a sensible self-help program for people having problems with drinking and using. It includes ideas and techniques to help change lives from self-destructive and unhappy to constructive and satisfying. It teaches commonsense self-help procedures designed to empower users to abstain and to develop a more positive lifestyle.

The extensive site offers information about treatment programs, a providers locator, a suggested reading list, and urgent help resources, as well as an online community forum and a message board.