Four Dead Queens(41)

Stessa liked being queen; she liked ensuring the other quadrants didn’t ruin what she considered the perfect community. She liked being taken seriously. And, she had to admit, she liked the attention.

Was she the same girl she’d been in Ludia? No.

“Does it matter?” She stopped swaying and tilted her head back to see his expression.

“Not if you’re happy.”

Her mother had always told her that if she held love in her heart, everything else would fall into place. But Stessa’s love for Lyker had driven her to commit sinister deeds, things her mother would never support. Ludists weren’t supposed to be dark and devious. They were light, playful, carefree. And Lyker was the epitome of sunshine and warmth. But every day, she saw his light dim and darken, and every day another weight pressed on her shoulders.

“I’m happy when I’m with you,” she said eventually.

“What if we leave the palace before the inspector finds out about us?” His voice was hopeful. He’d never wanted her to accept the Ludist throne in the first place, suggesting they run away. It might’ve been easier. He still suggested running once a week, but this was the first time she actually considered it. It had taken a few months, but Stessa had embraced her role as queen, especially when she had Lyker by her side. She wanted to be as respected as Iris, as knowledgeable as Marguerite and as composed as Corra. With Iris’s murder, and the inspector’s unnerving presence, Stessa questioned whether this was the life she really wanted after all.

“Where would we go?” she asked. “Everyone knows my name. And my face.”

“You’re the master of disguise.” He grinned and tapped her nose, referring to the parties they had attended together dressed in elaborate clothing and makeup to fool their friends, only revealing themselves at the end of the night. “But we’d have to leave Quadara.”

Stessa knew that would hurt Lyker. He missed his family, friends and the freedom to create art wherever he went. He’d given up everything to be with her. They used to laugh and smile every hour of every day. Now all they did was lie, scheme and worry.

He watched her, waiting for a response.

She let a breath slowly escape through her teeth. “We can’t, even if we wanted to. They’ve closed the palace. No one in, no one out. Not until they find Iris’s assassin.”

“But you’re considering it?”

Stessa didn’t want to give up her throne, the power or the responsibility. But she couldn’t give up Lyker. If the inspector found out the truth, she’d be separated from him forever. She bit her lip, unsure what to do.

“I want to be happy,” he continued. “With you. We would be happier outside of the palace, I’m sure of it.”

Stessa could imagine a simpler life with Lyker. A life where he could paint words of love on the walls of their house to the tune of Stessa’s songs. She would miss the palace, but not as much as she missed her home back in Ludia. And Lyker was disappearing in front of her eyes. She had to make the choice. Her love for Lyker, or her position on the throne.

There was no choice. It was Lyker, always and forever.

“I think you’re right,” she said. “But we have to wait until they open the palace doors.”

“Then we run?” His beautiful face was lit with hope. It was all he’d ever wanted, the two of them together, no one to force them to part. No more stolen kisses and midnight rendezvous. Time would be theirs. They could start a new life.

No secrets, no laws, no murders.

“Yes.” She grinned up at him.





CHAPTER FOURTEEN





Keralie



Keralie.

Darkness was kind. Still. Free from pain. Free from all that blood.

Keralie.

I once knew a girl called Keralie. But I was no longer that girl.

Keralie.

Her life was kind. Full of love. Full of happiness and laughter. Then she shattered it. And there was no getting it back.

“Keralie!”

My eyes flew open. Varin’s concerned face filled my vision. I was lying on a bed. Varin’s bed. His eyes were wide, his face flushed, and his hair stuck in odd directions as though he’d been pulling at it. But his hands were now on mine. He quickly retracted them when he saw I was awake.

“What happened?” I asked, my voice raw, my whole body shaking.

“You were screaming and then you passed out.” He pulled the pads from my temples. “How do you feel?”

I tentatively moved to a sitting position. “Like I murdered Quadara’s queens.”

“That’s not funny.” He frowned. “Here.” He offered me a glass of water and a food bar. His hands were shaking, and he was breathing heavily. He was in shock. I knew how it felt.

My stomach was too agitated for food, but I gladly accepted the glass.

“Why didn’t you tell me what was on the chips?” he asked while I drank. “Why didn’t you warn me?”

“I did warn you.” I placed the empty glass on the floor and rubbed my forehead. I wanted to crawl back into the darkness. It was too bright here. “And if I’d told you, you wouldn’t have believed me.”

Now that the memories had been untangled, they were impossible to ignore. Each and every queen, dead.