Fearless (Nameless #3)(25)
“But why does Laden need you to convince Murtog to come? Why not send someone else?”
Zo sighed. “He thinks Murtog will find the invitation less threatening coming from Raca and me.”
Scoffing, Gryphon said, “Murtog needs a new bride. Laden’s using you as a lure. You and Raca both.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “You’ve done enough for that man. He can’t expect you to go back out into the wilderness on another dangerous journey.”
“I’ve made promises,” said Zo.
“To hell with your promises!”
Zo flinched at Gryphon’s tone even though she knew she wasn’t the object of his anger. From the first time she’d met him inside Ram’s Gate, he’d always seemed so levelheaded. So in control. But since coming to the Allied Camp, he’d been more volatile, as though even the tiniest disturbance could put him over the edge.
It had to be the stress of staying in a camp surrounded by men he’d been taught to see as the enemy.
He shook his head. “I’m sorry. I just feel this … need to protect the time we have together.” He kissed her forehead again. “Please.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “Tell Laden to send someone else.”
“Gryphon.” She slid her arms around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. “You speak of time like it’s fleeting. We will have lots of time together. As much time as you want.”
She inwardly cursed herself for sounding so needy. She didn’t want to be the type of girl to beg or hint at the future. When Gryphon had asked if he could call her his, she hadn’t thought to have him clarify what that meant, exactly. Had Gryphon been a Wolf, she would have assumed they were officially courting, which was a step that almost always led to marriage. But nothing about Gryphon and Zo was usual.
“If there is one thing my life as a Ram soldier has taught me, it’s that you can never trust time. We could have days. We could have years. One can never know. And with this war on the brink of boiling over, there is a real chance that—”
Zo pressed her hand to cover his mouth. “Shhhh. I can’t even bear hearing it.”
Gryphon took hold of her wrist and gently pulled her hand away. His lips were pressed into a firm line, his chin wrinkled and tense. The muscles in his neck flexed, as though some internal war waged within him. He finally managed, “Please, just stay. Commander Laden will understand.”
She held up the backs of her hands, showing him the jagged cuts she’d refused to explain when he’d abducted her from Ikatou’s camp. The wounds had only recently closed, leaving uneven pink lines to serve as a reminder of her blood oath. “I’m not going for Commander Laden.”
Chapter Ten
Gryphon wanted to throw a boulder into the mountainside—enough rage boiled within him that he probably could.
“I could kill Ikatou! How could he force you into that agreement? How could he take advantage knowing you had no other option?” Gryphon walked away from Zo, staring out over the dark valley dotted with campfires. He only had twenty-one days before he had to meet Ajax and offer Barnabas his head. The thought of Ikatou robbing seven of those precious days that might have been spent with Zo drove him to the brink of madness.
Had he known about Zo’s promise to help Ikatou free the Nameless before Ajax had knelt in the mud at his feet, no amount of begging would have swayed him to agree to help his friend. Not when Zo needed him to help fulfill this ridiculous task.
The Great Move was underway. Barnabas would be leading not just his warriors, but women, children, and even the Nameless from the Gate in a mass exodus south to relocate in the Valley of Wolves. If there was ever a time to free the Nameless, it was now.
The problem was, Gryphon hadn’t told Laden or Zo about the Great Move. He hadn’t wanted to give Laden that much of an upper hand against his people, and he hadn’t wanted to break Zo’s heart by admitting how he’d obtained that information. If Zo knew they only had a few short weeks left together, she’d be livid.
He didn’t want to ruin what time they had.
“You can’t blame Ikatou,” said Zo, coming to stand beside him. “You and I both know the lengths a person is willing to go to protect family.” She reached out to take his hand.
Did she consider him her family? If things were different, he would have done whatever it took to convince Laden to offer his blessing. He would have learned the proper customs of her clan. She deserved the very best life had to offer.
He shook his head. So many would haves and should haves.
Zo must have misinterpreted his silence. “Ikatou has four daughters, Gryph.” Her hands slid up his arm to grip him above and below the elbow. “Can you imagine having your little girl stolen from you to become another man’s slave?”
Gryphon closed his eyes in shame for his clan and people. And then, he allowed his imagination to travel in a thin stream of thought to one of the many would haves of his future.
He imagined Zo sitting on an outcropping of stone with the sun shining down on her tanned skin as she sang a silky-sweet tune. A little girl, with her mother’s wild hair, stomping in and out of the stream at Zo’s feet. A boy a few years older, picking up a small stone from the bank and throwing it into the water, too grown-up for the games his little sister played. The boy’s almond eyes the same sharp blue as Zo’s. And even though he wouldn’t admit it, the boy clearly loved being near his mother.