Fearless (Nameless #3)(14)

As for Gryphon, he’d never felt more homeless, even in the wilderness. He lay back in his bedroll and watched the flapping ceiling of the tent, pondering his decision not to tell Laden about the Ram leaving the Gate and moving against the Wolves. His first reaction was to think of his brothers. Till now every betrayal he’d committed was done out of necessity for Zo or Joshua. No one was supposed to be punished for his actions except for him alone.

Telling Commander Laden about the Ram moving out against the Wolves was entirely different. If the Allies had time to join the main forces defending the Wolves, then the Ram would suffer enormous casualties. With numbers stacked so heavily in the Allies’ favor, they might even have a chance at victory.

But would that be so terrible? His conscience pricked him. At least it would mean Zo, Tess, and Joshua were safe. It would mean freedom for the enslaved Nameless.

Could he condemn his own people?

Gryphon growled and rolled out of bed to dress as he considered the alternative. The price for his silence would be the lives of women and children who lived unaware of the coming Ram forces in the Valley of Wolves. Zo’s people would be completely destroyed without the help of the Allies. The Ram would not spare even the most helpless babe. And after the blood dried, new homes would be built upon the ash of their bones.

Gryphon curled his fists into his hair until his scalp burned. These were Zo’s people. He’d warned the Raven without hesitation. How could he justify not warning the Wolves?

Because I hate them.

And why was he given this responsibility? Why should one word from him manipulate the destiny of so many?

“This way, Ram.” A light-haired guard poked his head through the tent. He had the same look as Gabe and for that reason alone, Gryphon decided not to trust him. He followed him to Commander Laden’s tent. When he ducked inside, Laden was giving orders to a pair of soldiers. Millie, the older woman he’d briefly met the day before, gestured for him to sit at one end of Laden’s desk. She set a plate of fried eggs and bread before him.

“Thank you.” He turned to face the woman and asked, “Could you tell me how to find Zo?”

The old woman left without meeting his eye and arrived a moment later with a mug and kettle. As she poured a fragrant tea, her hands shook so violently that she spilled.

She’s afraid of me.

It was possible the Ram reputation was enough to frighten anyone from an outside clan. But it was also possible her fear came from personal experience. That thought made Gryphon shift uncomfortably in his seat.

“Thank you,” he said again, picking up a fork. He hesitated before bringing the food to his lips. “It is … safe, isn’t it?” he asked.

The older woman forgot her fear long enough to scowl at him, ramming her hand onto her hip. “About as safe as having a Ram in my camp.”

Her camp? Gryphon held her gaze while he slowly spooned eggs into his mouth and chewed. New seasonings he’d never tasted filled his mouth. He quickly took a second bite, and around a mouthful, said, “It’s good. Thank you.”

Millie’s lips formed a thin line and she walked away, grumbling about Ram devils and feeding the enemy.

“You just won your first ally,” said Laden.

Gryphon hadn’t realized he and the Commander were alone. “She hates me. I frighten her.”

Laden nodded his agreement. “It will take them time to learn to trust you.”

Gryphon didn’t bother pointing out that he didn’t plan to stay long.

Twenty-two days.

Only long enough to get Joshua settled and find a way to say goodbye to the people he cared for most.

“Wolves, you’ll find, are more tolerant than the Ram. It’s fortunate for you they value forgiveness and justice. Though they might hate you and all you represent, they will weigh the help you’ve given Zo and Tess in their judgments. Just as I have.”

Gryphon doubted it. “I don’t need them to like me.”

Laden snorted into his mug. “Yes, you do.”

At that, Gryphon looked up. “How so?”

Laden sighed. “The Allies are not a Clan, Gryphon. We are an army that exists to serve one purpose: to bring down the Ram. No one in this camp plans to stay here forever. Most spend the winter months back home with their families. They come here to train and prepare for a fight, but they are Kodiak, Raven, and Wolf first, and Allies second.”

Gryphon nodded his understanding.

“When this fight is over, the Allies will dissolve. People will go back to their lives with their own clans, customs, and traditions.”

“I still don’t know what this has to do with people approving of me.”

Laden scoffed. “You have no clan, Gryphon. The Ram will not have you back after your betrayal. Where will you go? Who will become your people then? How will you provide for a wife? Trust me. A man without a banner is no man at all.”

Gryphon took a long drink of tea, doing his best to pretend that Laden’s words hadn’t affected him.

“If these people don’t grow to trust you, you’ll never be welcomed anywhere after this conflict has passed.”

So long as Joshua was accepted, being welcomed by the Wolves or any other clan wasn’t Gryphon’s concern. He wouldn’t live long enough for it to matter.

“Among the Wolves, I am Zo’s fastnandi—her guardian. By their law, you would need my permission to marry.”