Emerge: The Captive: (Book 3)(44)

“Give me something a little harder this time?” She set her handguns down and traded them for the repeating rifle.

“Hit all five this time,” he said, nodding to the monks to set her targets in motion.

Sasha took aim and sighted down the first clay bird, taking them each in rapid succession.

“Very good.”

Sasha was surprised to hear real praise coming from him.

“Good enough to test drive the big gun?” she asked.

“One shot.”

“Yes!” She watched eagerly as Jay rolled out a rubber mat and moved the enormous weapon to the ground, just at the cliff edge. She waited impatiently for him to sight down a target.

“Come, let me show you.” He gestured for her to lay beside him on the mat.

She listened carefully as Jayesh demonstrated how to use the high-powered lens to zero in on the steel plate target he’d set up more than two thousand yards away.

“I put a block of ballistics gel behind the plate so we can see how clean a shot you can get from here.

Sasha laughed as she switched places with him.

“What’s so funny?”

“This is so not how I thought I’d be spending my summer.”

“You’re a little bit of a weirdo, aren’t you? Most girls your age get excited about fancy shoes and boys, right?”

“Don’t get me wrong, Jay. I like shoes and boys, probably even more than most girls, but guns are my jam.” She smiled as she positioned herself behind the lens to get a feel for the weapon.

In that moment, as much as she wanted to succeed, she knew she needed to miss the shot. Jayesh needed to be reminded that she wasn’t infallible. That someone her age couldn’t be trusted behind a sniper rifle when the situation was real.

“Take a breath and focus,” Jayesh said, his hand at her back to steady her. “When you’re ready, pull the trigger and be prepared for the recoil. It’s going to kick like a bull.”

Sasha felt a flutter in her chest at his nearness.

He smells nice. The errant thought sent a spike of dread through her. Jay was certainly attractive, but she did not need to be crushing on her trainer. Especially not the arrogant jerk laying beside her. What’s wrong with me? Guilt sent her reeling. She owed Quinn more loyalty.

Sasha took a deep breath, letting her emotions take precedence over her gift. She aimed, waited for the subtle warning of her gift to pass and fired.

“You missed,” Jayesh said.

She wasn’t certain how he would react when she missed the first time, but the chill of his tone terrified her.

“Why did you miss?” he asked. “I was told you never miss.”

“I never miss the target when my gift is engaged. Sometimes my focus is off, and I don’t connect with the target. When that happens, I can miss.”

“Explain.” He stood with his arms behind his back, watching her like a predator waiting to pounce on its prey.

Sasha rose to face him. “Sometimes I just don’t feel it, Jay.” She shrugged. “There is no other explanation.”

“That isn’t good enough, Sasha. You must practice until there is no room for error.”

“Which is exactly what my training has been about in the two years since my Awakening. I had this ridiculous notion that I would have all this time to master this gift. I guess I’m expected to perform well beyond my years, then?”

“Yes, you are young.” He stood ramrod straight in front of her. “But you need to accept that the Senate will demand perfection. Explain.”

“When I’m in that moment, right before I take a shot, I need to be centered. I need to be calm and I need to feel it when my gift engages with the target. When that happens, I will not miss.”

“And if you’re in a situation where it is impossible to be calm and serene? I need to understand every aspect of your gift before I can ever trust you to join my team. You will tell me what it takes to make your gift work when it matters.”

“You need to trust me?” Sasha glared, her eyes simmering with rage. She’d had enough. “You. Trust. Me?” She leaned in to him. “What about me trusting you? You arrogant ass. Do you think for one moment that I’m stupid enough to trust you with the knowledge of every nuance of my gift when we live in a world that teaches us the exact opposite? You think my mother didn’t teach me to guard the secrets of my power with my life? You trained with her. You know her ways. Do you really think Naeemah El Sadawii would teach me to give in so easily just because someone older and stronger tells me I’m supposed to trust him when he hasn’t even earned it? This goes against every fiber of my being. And you want to be able to trust me? Trust is a two-way street, Jayesh. I’m not one of your soldiers. I’m not even out of high school yet. I know you need to trust my gift, but you need to back the hell off and show me you’re worth trusting.”

Jay took a step back, his face pale in the heat of the day. He clearly wasn’t accustomed to anyone standing up to him the way she continuously did.

“Of course. You’re right.” He nodded absently. “You are so young. I know this is difficult.” His voice sounded distant as if he hadn’t heard a single word she’d said. “You will continue to practice on your own here for the rest of the afternoon. I—I want you to feel at ease when you practice and clearly my presence is affecting you negatively. I will leave you to it.”