Deviation (Clone Chronicles #2)(53)

“No.” I shake my head harder than necessary. My distress is turning to irritation at my lack of available options. I feel even more trapped than I did when I arrived at Rogen Tower—something I didn’t think was possible.

He sighs and it’s heavy and full of unspoken possibilities, none of them good.

“What are you thinking?” I ask quietly.

Something in my voice catches his notice and he looks up, the lines creasing his forehead smooth some. “Nothing good,” he admits. “But what about you? How are you holding up?”

I consider his question. “Okay,” I say, a little surprised at the realization. “Believe it or not, I mean it,” I assure him.

He studies me carefully, lifting a hand to smooth the edges of my hair and tuck it behind my ear. His smile is nothing more than a ghost as he says, “I can see that. You’ve come such a long way from the timid, terrified girl I met. He thinks he scared you off tonight, you know.”

“I know.” I swallow hard, pushing past the fear that tries to bubble up in the back of my throat. “And I am scared,” I admit. “But I’m more determined than I am afraid.”

“Determined to do what?” he asks. His hand is still stroking, still smoothing my hair, and I focus on that and let it comfort me, let it smooth out the wrinkles of worry. I wonder briefly about cameras and listening devices, but if Linc isn’t worried, neither am I.

My heart answers the question immediately. It is determined to be human, despite the impossibility of that. I catch myself before I can say something so unrealistic. Instead, I go with the next best thing. “To be free,” I say finally. I continue, the words coming faster as I give voice to the plan that’s been forming. “And I think I have a way to do it. I think we can use Raven, any one of them, really. If we can get to her, bring her here, people will be forced to see. Titus won’t be able to hide them anymore. Not when the whole world has evidence of copies standing right in front of them. They’ll have to accept us. They won’t allow him to lock people up like that.”

“You’d be openly defying him if you did that,” Linc says.

“Yes.”

“You couldn’t stay here any longer,” he points out.

“No.”

Something in Linc’s expression lights and a warning bell sounds in my head. “Hear me out. What if I told you I could get you out of here right now, get you somewhere safe without Titus knowing. Not to Morton and the others. Somewhere else. We could be gone and free of your GPS before he could find us—”

“No.” I withdraw my hand from his. “I already told you, I’m not leaving. I can’t help them unless I’m her.”

“You can’t help them as her, either,” he snaps. “You have no freedom, no access. My idea could change that. If we get the help—”

“How many times do I have to tell you?” I ask. “I don’t want to run away just because it gets tough.”

His eyes flash. “Tough? He beats the crap out of you. You’re a prisoner here. We both are.”

My anger rises just as swiftly as his. “Well, don’t let me hold you back. You can leave anytime,” I snap back.

“Ven …” Just like that, his anger vanishes and he’s reaching for me, taking my wrists and pulling me back to him. This time, he leans in and adjusts our bodies so that we’re pressed together in all the areas that matter.

My heart gallops away at the sensation of his touch. It doesn’t matter how many layers of fabric separate us, I feel his body against mine as if we’re both naked. My skin tingles and my breath catches.

“Do you know how hard it was for me to let you go with him tonight? I followed you as far as I could. I knew you were in there with him. But I had no way of getting to you. I had to just wait and—God, do you have any idea what that’s like?”

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, even though none of it is my fault.

Linc’s eyes are fastened on mine. His determination and intensity speak volumes. In a low voice, something between a growl and an oath he says, “I will never leave you, Ven. Not ever. In this life or the next. I swear it.”

The tears that well up in my eyes are completely irrational yet I can do nothing to hold them back. They slip down my cheeks before I can blink them away. I duck and hide my face in the crook of his neck. “I don’t have a next, Linc.” I sniffle. “This is my only life and then I’m nothing.”

“You’re not nothing,” he says fiercely. “You’re an angel. An original. Individually beautiful inside and out. Don’t let Titus or his society make you believe otherwise. And more than any of that, you’re mine. My family. My future.”

I don’t answer. Anything I say will be washed away by sobbing if I open my mouth now.

“Look at me,” he says. I remain where I am, unwilling to sit up and break away from the warmth of his body. I have never enjoyed any other place in the world as much as this little pocket between his shoulder and chin.

When I don’t move, he gently lifts me away until I’m facing him. The way he studies me makes me feel nervous and special at the same time. If I had a soul, it would be bared in this moment. Tension flares between us, stretching into the silence like a taut wire.

“Ven, I mean it. If you don’t believe it for yourself, believe it for me. When you look at me, I want you to remember I love you for who you are on the inside. You are you, no one else. And you don’t need to be her. Not for Titus, not for Morton and the others, and certainly not for me. Okay?”