Complete Nothing (True Love #2)(61)
Her smile was stiff. She seemed like she was holding her breath. I cocked my head at her, considering as I chewed. I knew I had loved Claudia then. And if she’d asked me the same question in the locker room yesterday, I probably would have said yes. But that was before. Before I’d seen Claudia trying to touch her tongue to Keegan Traylor’s tonsils. Before she’d publicly humiliated me. Before I’d started to feel completely unsure about whether anything we’d ever had was real. Yesterday had made me doubt everything. How could I love Claudia now?
“I mean, I don’t know. I do . . . miss her,” I said, lowering my voice in case Josie’s friends could hear. “But what do I know about love?”
“Oh, don’t be a wuss, Peter!” Michelle exclaimed. “You and Claudia were totally in love. You’re just terrified to say it because of the divorce.”
“What?” True and I asked.
“We’re totally learning about it in health class, in our psychology section?” she rambled, then took another bite of her cupcake. “Children of divorce are more likely not to trust their mates and are slower to show their love. I thought it was crap because I’m in love, like, every other week, but obviously for you it’s true.”
“No, it’s not,” I said automatically.
“Yes, it is!” she cried, spraying crumbs over the table.
Gross. I handed her a napkin. “Dude. Eat with your mouth closed.”
“I am!” she replied, sighing with her hand over her lips. She waited until she swallowed before adding. “God! I’m just trying to help.”
“So do you think that’s it?” True asked me. “Do you think you love her but are just . . . afraid to say it?”
“I don’t know.” I took another huge bite of cupcake and stared at the bathroom door in the corner. This was a pretty heavy conversation for a Sunday afternoon. Especially a Sunday afternoon following a night of drinking and a day of hard labor.
“Look, people break up sometimes, but it’s okay to get back together,” True said. “So you wanted to sow your wild oats, see what else was out there, date some sophomore with big—”
“Hey,” I said, silencing her. My face burned, but luckily Michelle was too busy licking icing off her fingers to have heard what True was saying. “That’s not why I broke up with her.”
There was a long silence. True looked baffled. “So, why, then?”
“Because!” I said under my breath. “I couldn’t . . . All I could think about was how we were going to have to break up. Eventually. Like, before college. It was like I was obsessed with it. How she was gonna move on without me, find some guy better than me—”
“There’s no guy better than you,” Michelle said matter-of-factly.
“Thanks, Michelle, but that’s what you think. What about what Claudia thinks?”
“Oh!” True sat back hard in her chair, a smile crossing her face. “So it wasn’t that you needed space! It was separation anxiety!”
“What are you, some kind of shrink?” I asked.
True ignored the question. “Claudia doesn’t want someone better than you! She doesn’t want anyone but you.”
She said it with such conviction that I almost believed her. Then the door to the shop opened with a tinkle of bells, and my heart dropped out of my body. Claudia had just walked in with Keegan Traylor’s arm around her. They were so focused on each other, they didn’t see anyone else in the room, including me. I watched as they sat down on the bench behind a window table and immediately began to maul each other. Lauren walked in behind them and slouched down across from them. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and she stared in the opposite direction like she was fed up. Like she’d been watching this go on for hours.
Perfect. This was totally perfect.
I turned around, stone-faced, and looked at True. “Yeah, that really looks like I’m the only guy she wants.”
True seemed paler than she had a second ago. “I see your point, but I—”
“We’ll take the rest of the cupcakes to go. Michelle, tell her what you want,” I said gruffly, getting up and keeping my back to Claudia on the way to the door. “I’ll wait for you outside.”
As far away from the windows of Goddess Cupcakes as I could get.
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
Claudia
“Can you believe that woman thought that was her space?” Keegan laughed, reaching for his bottle of water.
“I know, right?” I said, smiling as he squeezed my shoulder.
“Well, she did have her blinker on,” Lauren stated, pressing her thumb into a leftover crumb on her plate and sucking it off.
“Yeah, but you’re supposed to pull up in front of a spot and then back in.” Keegan lounged in the booth with his arm spread across the top of the bench. “That’s the law.”
“Did you notice she had a handicap symbol on her license plate?” Lauren asked.
“Lauren,” I said through my teeth.
“So?” Keegan raised his palms.
“So, I don’t know, it might have been nice if you’d driven up the block and let her have the space. I mean, it’s a beautiful day and we don’t mind walking, right, Claudia?” she asked, looking expectantly at me.