Bring Me Back (B.A. Paris)(75)



‘Not at all—I’m delighted that Millie will be living here. It will add another dimension to our lives, won’t it, darling?’

I lift my glass and take a sip of my wine so that I don’t have to answer.

‘You obviously get on well with her,’ Esther remarks.

‘Well, I hope she’s as fond of me as I am of her – although it did take her a while once Grace and I were actually married.’

‘Why was that?’

‘I think the reality of our marriage was a shock to her,’ I tell her.‘She had adored Jack from the beginning, but when we came back from our honeymoon and she realised that he was going to be with me the whole time, she became jealous. She’s fine now, though. Jack is once again her favourite person.’

‘Thankfully George Clooney has taken my place as Millie’s object of dislike,’ Jack laughs.

‘George Clooney?’ Esther queries.

‘Yes.’ I nod, glad that Jack has brought it up. ‘I had this thing about him…’

‘Don’t we all?’ murmurs Diane.

‘… and Millie was so jealous that when some friends gave me a George Clooney calendar for Christmas one year, she scrawled on it “I don’t like George Clooney”, except that she spelt it phonetically – J-O-R-J K-O-O-N-Y – she has a bit of trouble with the “L”,’ I explain.‘It was so sweet.’

Everyone laughs.

‘And now she never stops telling everyone that she likes me but she doesn’t like him. It’s become a bit of a mantra— “I like you, Jack, but I don’t like George Cooney”.’ Jack smiles. ‘I must admit that I’m quite flattered at being mentioned in the same breath,’ he adds modestly.

Esther looks at him. ‘You know, you do look a bit like him.’

‘Except that Jack is much better looking.’Adam grins. ‘You can’t believe how relieved we all were when he married Grace. At least it stopped the women in the office fantasising about him – and some of the men too,’ he adds laughingly.

Jack sighs good-naturedly.‘That’s enough, Adam.’

‘You don’t work, do you?’ Esther says, turning back to me. I detect in her voice the thinly veiled scorn that working women reserve for those who don’t, and feel compelled to defend myself.

‘I used to, but I gave up my job just before Jack and I got married.’

‘Really?’ Esther frowns.‘Why?’

‘She didn’t want to,’ Jack intervenes. ‘But she had a high-powered job and I didn’t want to come home exhausted and find that Grace was just as exhausted as I was. It was perhaps selfish of me to ask her to give up her job but I wanted to be able to come home and offload the stress of my day rather than be offloaded onto. She also travelled quite a lot and I didn’t want to come home to an empty house, as I already had done for many years.’

‘What was your job?’ Esther asks, fixing me with her pale-blue eyes.

‘I was a buyer for Harrods.’

The flicker in her eyes tells me she’s impressed.The fact that she doesn’t ask me to expand tells me that she’s not going to show it yet.

‘She used to travel all over the world first class,’ Diane says breathlessly.

‘Not all over the world,’ I correct. ‘Just to South America. I sourced their fruit, mainly from Chile and Argentina,’ I add, largely for Esther’s benefit.

Rufus looks at me admiringly.‘That must have been interesting.’

‘It was.’ I nod.‘I loved every minute of it.’

‘You must miss it, then.’ Another statement from Esther.

‘No, not really,’ I lie. ‘I have plenty here to keep me occupied.’

‘And soon you’ll have Millie to look after.’

‘Millie is very independent and anyway, she’ll be working most of the time at Meadow Gate.’

‘The garden centre?’

‘Yes. She loves plants and flowers so she’s very lucky to have been offered the perfect job.’

‘So what will you do all day long?’

‘Much the same as I do now – you know, cooking, cleaning, gardening – when the weather permits.’

‘You’ll have to come for Sunday lunch next time and see the garden,’ says Jack.‘Grace has green fingers.’

‘Goodness,’ says Esther lightly.‘So many talents. I’m so glad I was offered a post at St Polycarp’s. I was getting quite bored being at home all day.’

‘When do you start?’

‘Next month. I’m replacing a teacher on maternity leave.’

I turn to Rufus. ‘Jack tells me you have a huge garden,’ I prompt and, while I serve more of the Beef Wellington, which, along with the vegetables, has been keeping warm on a hotplate, the conversation around the table revolves around landscaping rather than me.As everyone laughs and talks together, I find myself looking wistfully at the other women and wondering what it must be like to be Diane, or Esther, to not have someone like Millie to consider. I immediately feel guilty because I love Millie more than life itself and wouldn’t change her for the world. Just thinking about her gives me new resolve and I get purposefully to my feet.

‘Is everyone ready for dessert?’ I ask.

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