Where One Goes(79)

“You didn’t have to do that, but I really appreciate it,” he manages. Deciding to put him out of his misery, I finally meet his gaze. Stepping toward him, I reach one hand out and thread my fingers through his hair.

“I’ve really missed you, too,” I whisper as his hands rest on my hips. “I do want to be with you . . . but I need to know something.”

My heart thunders as I remind myself to breathe again. “What do you need to know?” he asks after swallowing hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he does.

“I need to know you believe me,” I squeak. My mouth is suddenly dry, but I dart my tongue out and lick my lips. “You didn’t believe me before. And that’s okay, not everyone does at first. Hell, my father still doesn’t believe it. But George, I’m not crazy,” I add as I look him square in the eye. “I never asked for this . . . gift, but it’s mine now. There was a time when I hated it with every fiber of my being, but I don’t anymore, because without it, I wouldn’t be here right now. I was in such a dark place I would’ve killed myself that night . . . I know it.” I give him a once-over, but I can’t read his reaction, so I decide to continue. “And because I can see the dead, I’m alive. Ike saved me and brought me here. Without my ability I would’ve never met you.” I remember to get to the point as I nervously push some of my hair behind my ear. “It’s not going away. I will most likely always see the dead, and if we’re going to be together, that may make our relationship difficult at times, especially if you don’t believe me.”

George pulls away and my heart drops to the pit of my stomach.

He doesn’t believe me.





“If I could go back and redo the night you told me that, I swear I would do it differently. My head was so f*cked up and . . .” I’m doing a horrible job explaining this. “It was a lot to take in.”

“I know it was,” she tells me, her gaze on the floor.

“Charlotte. Look at me, please.” Her gaze is riddled with sadness when she lifts her head. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about it. I did believe you that night.”

“You did?” she asks, surprised.

“I was mad. Unreasonably so, but I was,” I admit with shame as I run a hand through my hair.

“But, why?”

This is the hard part. This is the part where I have to try to explain why I was such a dick. “I was jealous.”

“What?”

“I was jealous you could see him and I couldn’t. And I was envious the two of you spent so much time together. I was a clusterf*ck of emotions all the way around.” Her brows narrow as she listens to me. “Charlotte . . . since the day he died, all I’ve felt is guilt. It’s suffocated me. He was the good one, the brave one that died in war. If one of us were going to go, it should’ve been me, Charlotte. When I found out you could see him . . . communicate with him . . . that he was still here, I don’t know, it just reinforced all of those feelings. He should be the one here, not me. And to top it off, because I couldn’t get my shit together, he’d been stuck here.”

“George . . .” She says my name quietly. “I miss Ike,” she whispers, and her eyes close briefly, the pain in her heart evident. “And I’ll miss him every day of my life, but I would never trade you for him. Ike was all of those wonderful things you just said, but you’re selling yourself short.” She steps toward me, her gray eyes gazing upon me softly. “You are such an amazing brother and person; he couldn’t leave you behind until he knew you’d pull through. George, his love for you saved us both. Don’t you see how beautiful that is?”

My chest tightens and dread runs through me. I hate the thought of her trying to kill herself. I don’t like when she brings it up. Where the hell would I be without her? I swallow hard as I shake my head. “I just didn’t think I deserved you . . .”

“And now?”

I run a wide palm down my face and exhale loudly. “Now . . . well, now I hope I was wrong. Now I realize all I did was hurt you, myself, and even Ike.” Her understanding gaze tilts my world on its axis. All I want is to bury my face into her neck and brush my lips across her smooth skin. Stepping toward her, I seize her face in my hands and stare deeply into her eyes. “So to answer your question, I do believe you, and I believe in you. And no matter how intense your gift may make life sometimes, I want to be a part of it. Charlotte . . . I want you. All of you. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I love you.”

And now, all I want is to get lost in her. Lifting her, she squeaks in surprise as I set her on the kitchen island. No more words are needed as her lips meet mine. Biting back a growl, I settle closer between her legs. I know I should slow down, but I can’t help it. She’s driving me out of my mind, and I wouldn’t want it any other f*cking way. If she keeps making all those little noises, I’m going to lose all self-control. I hold on to her delicate hips, craving the warmth of her body. “Baby,” I breathe against her lips. “Do you know how much I love you?”

Her body trembles beneath my touch and I want to devour every inch of her. “Mmm-hmm,” she moans in reply. And she brings her lips back to mine. Her kiss says everything I’ve been hoping to hear. It says she wants me as much as I want her . . . that she’s mine.