What the Duke Wants(24)

He couldn’t remember the last time he held a woman’s hand for the simple pleasure of just touching her. It was blissful and remarkably intimate. Though he desperately wanted to remove her gloves and feel the heat of her skin on his.

As if remembering herself, she backed away abruptly, breaking their exchange. Her eyes were wide and glossy, as if restraining tears.

Charles felt his own chest constricting as he realized he was the cause.

“Your grace, I—”

“Car—Miss Lottie, please. Don’t.” He held up his hand and took a deep breath.

She nodded, her posture full of bravado, and Charles swore he saw her building a wall around herself, as if she needed extra armor to protect against him.

If he hadn’t already felt like a cad, that would have pushed him over the edge.

“Miss Lottie.” His chest ached at the words he knew he must say. His body warred against itself, knowing the truth but wanting desperately to find a way to make it not matter.

But some things just couldn’t be changed.

“I find that moving you and the girls to my estate in Bath is the wisest choice for us both. I’ll freely admit that my attraction to you is unacceptable and therefore, I’m removing you from my presence and quite honestly, from temptation. I’ll see that every need you and the girls have is immediately met and please, if you do need anything, do not hesitate to ask Tibbs. He’s the butler at Greenford Waters. Please give my regards to the girls, I don’t… think it prudent that I see them off myself.” He bowed and left.

The horrifically accepting and humble expression in her eyes haunted his memory as he walked away, mocking him.

****

“I still don’t understand why his grace didn’t say good bye,” Berty pouted in the corner of the carriage as they made their way to the countryside.

“He told me to give you his regards.” Carlotta spoke over the thick lump in her throat. Even after riding in the carriage for several hours, she still felt like at any moment she might dissolve into tears.

“But it’s particularly rude to not say goodbye,” Berty complained.

“Berty, hush,” Bethanny scolded, her eyes traveling to Carlotta and then darting away.

Obviously she was piecing things together. Which was exactly what Carlotta didn’t want.

“How long till we reach Bath?” Beatrix asked quietly.

“It’s about a day and half trip. His grace has made arrangements for us to stay at an inn in Oxfordshire. We’ll stay there tonight, wake early and travel a little over half a day to Bath.” Carlotta used all her inner strength to pull herself together. These girls needed her; she’d not fail them over some weak and futile heartbreak.

It wasn’t as if she didn’t know better. She did know better, but that didn’t prevent it from hurting. She knew it was futile to further the overwhelming attraction that ignited between them whenever it pleased, but hearing it from his lips… it was a wretched dose of reality and still stung.

She never thought he’d break the rules of society and pursue her. She had more common sense than that, but she would have liked for him to. As futile as it was, she just couldn’t seem to communicate that information to her traitorous heart.

Her throat constricted as she remembered his words, but his expression spoke volumes more. His dancing blue eyes were cold, polite and distant, his words clipped and cool, and his posture ridged. Everything he said seemed at odds with his body language. And quite honestly, she didn’t know which to believe. His words were kind, gentle even as he was more honest than was necessary, but it didn’t remove the sting from the implications.

He wanted her gone.

For her good, but also for his. She couldn’t hold that against him. But it didn’t sit well, being so easily disregarded. Her first taste of romance and she had to go and find the most unattainable bachelor in the country.

It miserably aligned with the rest of her recent luck.


But she refused to dwell on it. As she glanced over to the girls, she resolved to leave it behind like the dust from London. Like the smoky and foul heavy air, she’d dismiss it and embrace the fresh air of the future. Who knew? Maybe this temporary heartbreak —because it was temporary, she’d see that it was!— would make her stronger, wiser. And maybe she’d fall in love with someone kind, fiercely attractive and available in Bath.

And she couldn’t forget Garden Gate. Being in Bath would be, in a way, like being home. She’d visited the city often as a child and with her home so close, she could hopefully see it.

The day was looking brighter all the time.

Beatrix was staring out the window, Bethanny was reading, and Berty had promptly fallen asleep and was leaning against Carlotta’s shoulder. Her heart might be bruised, but she’d make sure it wasn’t broken. And above all, she wasn’t alone.





Chapter Six




Charles tried not to watch the carriage pull away, but he couldn’t seem to pry his gaze away from the Blood Bays as they clipped down the street and out of sight.

He was doing the right thing.

Or so he tried to remind himself. He was being noble, honorable even, in sending her way.

Damn it all.

Of course, the time he decided to be honorable was with the only woman he could never have, the only woman he ever wanted so badly and the only woman he should probably never see again.