Well Suited (Red Lipstick Coalition #4)(28)
“When I used to wait tables at a seafood restaurant, it was nothing more than an inedible garnish on which to place a lemon.”
“That’s a use I can support. Well, that and this salad.” She took another bite and moaned. “So good. I haven’t eaten a real meal in so long, I almost forgot what food tasted like.”
I frowned. “Does the nausea last the whole time?”
“No. By the time we’re living together, it should have subsided. Hopefully, at least.”
She said it so casually, without hesitation. Living together. I brushed the impulse to read into it away.
“I’ll plan a feast to commemorate. Cakes and pies and steaks and vegetables. Not a single thing on the table will be beige.”
Her brow quirked. “Can we have fries?”
I laughed. “Anything you want, Kate.”
“Thank you, Theodore.” She fished around in her container for more food. “I’m surprised you waited tables. I can’t quite picture you as restaurant staff.”
“Oh? I definitely was. Tommy bartended—way more money in it, but drunk people drive me nuts. He’d tap-dance around and entertain them, eat up the attention. I would have ended up laying them out or pitching them out the front door.”
She assessed me, head tilted. “I think it’s the suit. You look very…serious. Adult. I can’t even seem to imagine you young.”
“I’ll have to break out Ma’s albums for you. Tommy and I were wiry teens, tall and skinny and full of attitude. Well, Tommy at least. I just had to back his attitude up with a couple of spare fists.”
“I can’t imagine that either. You’re too civilized for brute force.”
Another laugh, this one a little too loud, the volume broken by my surprise. “You’ve met my brother, right?”
Her brow quirked. “Of course I have. You were there when I met him.”
“What I meant,” I said on a laugh, “is that he’s savage. He runs strictly on emotion, ruled by his heart. And all that’s done is lead him straight into trouble. It’s always been that way. He possesses a moral compass that cannot be swayed.”
“So do you.”
“True,” I conceded, “but the difference is that I think. Plan. Calculate. Act and react based on outcomes and consequences. Tommy doesn’t think a step ahead—he’s caught in the moment. I, on the other hand, don’t make many moves without thinking five steps down the line. But when we were kids, there was nothing to do but back him up. Hell, even now I back him up. At least now I get paid for it with more than a fat lip.”
Something hot burned behind her eyes like flickering embers. “Without a plan, I’m generally immobilized. I think everything through before taking a step as well. It’s why I’ve had difficulty coming to grips with so much change so fast.”
The simple honesty of her admission struck me. I lowered my container, resting it on my lap, waiting for her to continue.
“I’m having trouble with the uncertainty of all this. How do you plan for something you have so little control over?”
“You can’t,” I answered plainly, gently. “All you can do is plan for what you know. Make contingency plans. And above all else, be flexible.”
The embers in her eyes flared at that. “I’m trying to learn that. Flexibility. It’s not easy for me.”
“Me either,” I admitted, “but surviving my life and my brother has instilled that in me by conditioning.”
She nodded, pausing to think. And those thoughts were so loud, I could almost hear them. “Then I have another proposition.”
My heart lurched, sensing something I hadn’t anticipated. “I’m all ears.”
I expected her to argue the idiom, but she didn’t. She seemed too nervous to point out the impossibility of being comprised solely of ears.
“You are, by your own admission, somewhat of an expert at adapting to the unforeseen, and I am inept. I’d like to propose that you take the lead on decisions.”
I stared at her, unblinking. “Do you think that’s something you’ll actually be able to do? Let me lead?”
“Well, you did it so well at the club,” she joked wryly.
“It’s true, I did. But this is different.”
“I’m not saying it won’t come without its fair share of discussion. I need to be convinced. But you’re very convincing.”
I chuffed a laugh. “You’re not wrong there either. But I’m not sure if you really want to give me absolute power.”
“It wouldn’t be absolute. You’re right, there’s no way I could do that. But I’d like to open the lines of communication. I need input that’s logical and flexible and in opposition of my own. Because currently—and I’m guessing that for some time to come—I am emotional in ways I don’t know how to manage. I can’t untangle emotion from reason, and it’s been…difficult for me. And so, I’m wondering, can you help me?”
Her eyes were wide with uncertainty and open with earnestness. This woman who was so composed by law was vulnerable, laid out at my feet with her underbelly up. The weight of her request wasn’t lost on me.
And I had every intention of upholding the promise I made when I said, “Anything you want, Kate.”