Virtuous(38)

“That’s a tough one.”

“It was a deal breaker for the last woman I cared about. She believed everything that was said and written about me. I got tired of defending myself.”

“I can see how that would get old fast.”

“It does. I like to think I’m a trustworthy person.”

“Have you ever done something while in a relationship that you’re not proud of?”

After a long pause, he says, “Yes. When I was married. I told you she cheated on me.”

I nod.

He blows out a deep breath. “I was so furious and hurt and embarrassed. People tried to warn me away from her, but I was blind and in love and stupid. So stupid. I cheated on her after she did it to me.”

“Did you feel better after?”

Laughing, he says, “No. I felt worse because I let her make me into someone I didn’t even recognize, but what I did is on me, not her. I did it. I knew what I was doing. And it was all about revenge. I slept with her friend and made sure she found out about it.”

“Ouch.”

“Not my finest moment.”

“How old were you?”

“Twenty-four.”

“And this is why you’ve said you never want to be married again?”

“Part of it. Yeah.” He tightens his grip on my hand. “I want to say something here, but I’m so afraid it’ll sound insincere or ridiculous or even counterproductive to my effort to warn you off me.”

“That was quite an intro.”

I love the deep grooves in his cheeks that form when he gifts me with one of those genuine smiles that made him a superstar.

“What do you want to say?”

“Remember I’m being totally sincere here.”

“Got it.”

“Since I met you and spent time with you and then tried—unsuccessfully, it seems—to walk away from you, I don’t feel so… certain… that I’ll never get married again.”

“You sure know how to make a girl all fluttery inside, Flynn.”

He raises a brow. “Are you fluttery?”

“On the inside.”

Leaning in to close the distance between us, he says, “I’d really like to kiss you again.”

“I’d really like you to kiss me again.”

“Right now?”

“Now would be good.” I wonder who this confident, adventuresome person is. She’s been gone such a long time, I barely recognize her.

With his hands on my face, he draws me into another of those sizzling kisses that make my head spin. I love the way his hands feel on my face, the tender, cautious way he kisses me, as if I’m something precious and priceless. This kiss is more intense than the first one, maybe because we’re alone and not standing on a public street.

Then I feel the press of his tongue against my lips, and I can’t think about anything other than how amazing it feels to be held and kissed by him. He stands and brings me with him, my arms curling around his neck as I lean into him and the kiss. I can’t seem to get close enough.

“Natalie,” he whispers.

It takes a second for his words to permeate the fog I’m in after kissing him.

He takes my hand and leads me to the sofa. We sit close to each other, and he kisses me again. “Is this okay?”

“Yes.”

“How about this?” He slips his tongue between my lips and rubs it against mine, making me moan. “Is that a yes?”

“Mmm.”

“I need the word.”

“Yes, Flynn. Yes!”

When he smiles, his eyes light up. “I need to be sure in light of your…previously stated…limitations.”

“I said no sex. I never said a word about kissing.”

“So kissing is good?” His lips touch mine as he speaks.

“Kissing is very, very good.” It might be the best thing ever.

“I couldn’t agree more.”

I can’t get close enough to him. I want to be absorbed by him, consumed. I’ve never wanted that before. If anything, I’ve kept my distance for reasons that are mine and mine alone. Then he breaks the kiss and moves to my neck, his lips setting me on fire.

“So I haven’t succeeded in warning you away,” he says.

“I’d say you’ve failed miserably.”

“Thank God.” He kisses me again with deep sweeps of his tongue that have me on the verge of begging for something I said I didn’t want. “Come to LA with me, Natalie. Come be with me. I want you next to me, holding my hand when they read my name.”