VICTORIOUS (A Quantum Novel)(52)

“Fluff, no! Stop!” I jump from the bed on rubber legs that threaten to buckle under me to pull her off him. “Bad girl!”

“Oh my God, she bit me right on the ass!”

He spins around and tries to see behind him, his hard penis flopping as he jerks his body into contortions.

I can’t help it. I begin to laugh. I laugh so hard that tears stream down my face and Fluff tries to lick them up, the way she’s done so many times before. Those were heartbroken tears. These are joyful tears because my husband is so cute and funny as he tries to get a look at his wounded backside where there isn’t so much as a mark.

“Don’t worry,” I say, gasping from laughing, “your career as a butt model hasn’t been ruined.”

“How can you laugh at a moment like this? She attacked me when I was going down on you! I had my fingers in your—”

I cuddle Fluff to my chest and put my hands over her ears. “Not in front of Fluff! You left the door open.”

He advances toward us, a comically sinister expression on his face. “Are you saying it’s my fault because I left the door open?”

“And you made me scream. You’ve known since day one that she’s protective of me.”

“She’s certifiable!”

“She’s my baby.”

Fluff coos as I stroke her. “Naughty girl biting Daddy’s booty. Those buns are insured for millions. You can’t damage the merchandise.”

“Do you know how close she came to my balls where our future children live?”

I bite my lip because I know he won’t appreciate my laughter right now. “She’s very sorry she bit you. Again.”

“That’s three times. You know what they say about three strikes and you’re out?”

“If she’s out, I’m out.”

Through gritted teeth, he says, “Would you please remove her from our bedroom?”

“Don’t worry, precious. Daddy’s not really mad. You threatened his manhood, and boys are really funny about those kinds of threats. He understands that you were only protecting me.” I kiss her face and send her to go lie down in the living room, closing the bedroom door. Turning to him, I find that he’s nowhere near as amused by this as I am. “You have to admit it’s kinda funny.”

“It’s not even sorta funny.”

I pinch my fingers together as he advances on me. “Maybe just a teeny tiny bit funny?” I take a step back and encounter the wall.

“Nope. In fact, since you find it so funny, I assume you won’t mind accepting Fluff’s punishment for her. After all, I can’t exactly spank a poor, defenseless old dog.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Wouldn’t I?” He goes to sit on the bed and pats his lap.

I approach, planning to sit on his lap, but apparently that’s not what he has in mind. He turns me, and I end up facedown over his lap, his intentions now crystal clear as he rubs a hand over my cheeks. “Flynn, wait…”

“You know what to say to put a stop to it. Now,” he says, continuing to caress my suddenly sensitive skin, “how many spanks do we think your little wildebeest earned by biting me?”

“One.”

“Ha-ha, try again. She could’ve unmanned me.”

“She never came close to unmanning you.”

“Depends on your perspective. If you give me a reasonable number, I’ll let you decide. Otherwise, I’ll decide, and I have a feeling my number won’t seem reasonable to you. After all, it was my butt that got bit.”

“Five?” I ask in little more than a squeak. The blood is beginning to rush to my head, among other places.

“Hmm, that’s a little more reasonable than one, but not quite in the range that I was thinking. Want to try again?”

“Seven?”

“Getting closer, but I’d say nothing less than ten would do in light of Fluff’s crime.”

“Ten? Seriously?”

“You know how to say no…”

The word is on the tip of my tongue, but I bite it. I won’t give him the satisfaction. “Fine.”

“What was that you said?”

“I said it’s fine.”

“Ten it is, then. Are you ready?”

“Hurry up already. I’m getting a headache from hanging upside down.”