VICTORIOUS (A Quantum Novel)(21)

I discover there’s a bevy of varieties when it comes to bondage. I mark light bondage and scarf play as soft limits and the rest as hard limits.

I set medical play and examinations as a hard limit as I can’t imagine any scenario in which I would find that arousing after suffering through the trauma of a rape exam. Voluntary and forced masturbation are both soft limits, as are nipple clamps. After hearing Flynn’s fantasy earlier, I admit to being intrigued by what that would feel like. Painful pleasure is a new term to me.

How do I feel about orgasm control? Meaning I would give up control of my orgasm to Flynn. He would say when, and I’d be at his mercy. I think about that for a minute before marking it as a soft limit.

Oh God, the next one on the list is rape fantasy.

“Mark a line through that one,” he says from over my shoulder, startling me. I was so engrossed, I didn’t hear him return with Fluff. “That’s off the table.”

I do as I’m told.

“I should’ve crossed that one off the list before I gave it to you. Sorry.”

“That’s okay.”

“No, it isn’t. My job is to take care of you, and by leaving that as an option, I didn’t take care of you.”

“It’s really okay, Flynn. You gave me the option to make it a hard limit, which it is, so we’re good.” I glance up at him. “Have you…”

He shakes his head. “I’ve never done it, but I hadn’t put it on my list of hard limits, which is why it’s still there. It’s a hard limit from now on.” Scanning the page, he checks what I’ve marked so far.

I’ve gotten to the part on sex toys, including dildos, butt plugs, vibrators and beads, as well as the public use of any or all of them.

“How does that work?” I ask, pointing to the word public.

“I could, for instance, insist that you wear a butterfly vibrator inside your panties when we’re going somewhere, and then use the remote control to turn it on at any time during the outing.”

I cross my legs. “Oh. Wow. Well…”

He laughs at my reaction. “Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it, sweetheart.”

“It does sound rather… interesting. What’s another example?”

Sliding his arms around me from behind, he nudges my hair out of his way and presses his lips to my neck. “I could insert a plug before an event such as the Oscars, for example, and you’d spend the entire evening sitting next to me, your ass being stretched by the plug so I could take you home after and replace the plug with my cock.”

A tremble ripples through my body at the thought of such a scenario.

“My baby likes that one, huh?”

“I don’t know. I’d be mortified.”

“No one would know except for you and me. That’s part of the thrill of this arrangement. You step outside your comfort zone with me and only me the wiser, and the reward is pleasure like you can’t imagine.”

As I raise my pen to mark the toys as a soft limit, he touches his lips to my ear. “Some of the plugs vibrate. That’s the ultimate.”

After a brief hesitation spent imagining a vibrating butt plug as part of my Oscar attire, I mark the toys as a soft limit as well as voyeurism, which sounds interesting as well. I think I’d enjoy watching others have sex, even if I’m not convinced I could let them watch me.

“That’s my girl,” he whispers. “So brave and fearless.”

“Hardly fearless, but what did you tell me? Try everything once and twice if we like it?”

“Words to live by.” After taking a closer look at the page of limits, he points to the question mark I’ve placed next to gagging. “What’s the question?”

“How do I use a safe word if I’m gagged?”

“That’s a great question, and the answer is we renegotiate the safe word so it’s a gesture. Perhaps you snap your fingers twice for slow down and once for stop? Or you do thumbs-up for good, when I ask you, and thumbs-down for bad. We work that out ahead of time.”

“Oh, okay.”

“You should know I’m not a huge fan of gagging. I like to hear my partner’s reaction to whatever I’m doing, and I especially like to hear your reactions, so let’s cross that off our list.” He takes the pen from me and draws a line through the word. “There’re a lot of other things people do in this lifestyle, but if it’s not on this list, it’s not of interest to me. In our club, every Dom has their own list of things they enjoy, and the sub can determine his or her limits based on the Dom’s list.”