Until November (Until, #1)(74)

Over the last few weeks, his skin has turned the color of caramel from working out in the sun. I bet a lot of women drive by his job sites just to see him without his shirt on. I know he takes it off to work, at least, occasionally. His tan is everywhere. He’s always beautiful, but asleep, he’s stunning. I wonder if I will ever get tired of looking at him.

My hand absently moves to my stomach. When I feel a slight flutter, I say a silent prayer that my daughter is okay. They were worried yesterday when they saw how much blood I lost. After lots of tests, the doctor found out that my cervix was bleeding due to the way I fell when I went for the gun. When I continued to bleed, they decided to keep me overnight for monitoring and put me on bed rest for a few weeks. This morning when they came to check on me, the bleeding had stopped and her heartbeat was stronger. The night doctor said that everything should be fine as long as I don’t push it. He also told me that I could be released as soon as my doctor showed up to sign me out.

“You awake?” Asher asks softly and I smile.

“Yeah,” I say, looking over at him. His eyes have dark circles under them from being awake most of the night, harassing anyone who came into the room with a million and one questions.

“How are you feeling?” he asks, sitting up and placing his hand over mine.

“Better. Tired, but much better.”

“Good.” He smiles and kisses my hand.

“Why don’t you go get a coffee?” I ask him.

“Nah, I'm good.”

“Babe, seriously, you look exhausted. Go get a coffee, walk around, and see if you can track down my doctor. This bed is really uncomfortable and I would like to go home.”

“I don’t know. We don’t have that machine at the house,” he says, pointing at the monitor for our daughter’s heartbeat. I look over at the machine and watch as her heartbeat thumps away. Then, I look back at him and can tell that he’s still worried.

“The doctor won’t let me leave if he thinks it’s too risky,” I tell him softly.

“I know, baby,” he says, bringing my hand to his mouth and holding it there after kissing my fingers. “I could have lost you both yesterday,” he says so quietly that I almost don’t hear him.

“You didn’t. We’re here and we’re safe.”

“When I heard that gun go off outside, I thought that my life had ended. I thought I was never going to see your face again, or be able to see our daughter take her first breath. And I knew I wouldn’t be able to survive without you here with me. I would take my life in order to go wherever you were.”

“Don’t say that.” I whimpered, shaking my head. “Don’t ever say that.”

“It’s the truth.”

“No, it’s selfish,” I cry. “Other people love you and count on you, not just me. No matter what happens to me, promise that you will never give up on life. That you will always fight to be happy. I'm not your only happiness.”

“No, you’re my bliss,” he says, smiling, but I can’t smile back. This is too serious.

“Promise me that you will never give up on life, no matter what, Asher. Promise me right now, because we have a daughter that is going to need you no matter what happens to me.” His eyes look so lost, but I won’t let him say stupid things like that. I wouldn’t be happy without him either, but I would still fight to live because I know he would want that for me. “Would you want me to follow you?” I ask quietly, knowing the answer.

“No.”

“So don’t say things like that,” I beg.

“I'm sorry, baby,” he says, pulling me into his arms. “I just don’t know what I would do.”

“You don’t have to worry about it. We’re here and we’re safe. Just promise that no matter what, you won’t leave our daughter behind if something happens to me.” I start to cry uncontrollably.

“I promise,” he finally says, and I curl into his side and fall asleep.

I'm sitting in my hospital bed waiting for my doctor to show up and discharge me after he decided to keep me for one more night. Asher went to the house to get me something to wear and to drop off Beast. I hear the door open and look up.

“November?” Chris is standing at the door of my hospital room.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, scooting back in the bed.

“I heard you were in the hospital. I wanted to check on you.”

“Who told you I was in the hospital?” He doesn’t answer, but walks into the room, shutting the door behind him. I press the call button for the nurse.

“You were supposed to come back to me,” he says, looking sad.

“You slept with my mom.” I will never forget that. Seeing them together was burned into my brain forever.

“Yes, and I'm sorry about that, but once I started to fall in love with you, I left you clues so that you would catch us.”

“What?”

“I wanted to have a clean start with you. I just didn’t know that after you caught us, you would ignore me completely.”

“I repeat: You slept with my mom. That’s not something that is easy to forget.”

“I know,” he whispers, looking at his shoes.

“The police are looking for you,” I tell him and pray that one of the nurses comes in soon.