Ugly Love: A Novel(86)

I can’t contain my laughter, because that sounds exactly like something Corbin would say to him. Miles laughs with me, and we take each other in for several quiet moments. I can see everything in his eyes now. Every single emotion.

“Miles,” I say with a smile, “you’re looking at me like you fell in love with me.”

He shakes his head. “I didn’t fall in love with you, Tate. I flew.”

He pulls me back to him and gives me the only part of himself that he’s never been able to give me until now.

His heart.





chapter thirty-nine


MILES


I stand in the doorway of my bedroom and watch her sleep. She doesn’t know it, but I do this every morning she’s here with me. She’s what starts my day off right.

The first time I did this was the morning after I met her. I couldn’t remember much from the night before. The only thing I remembered was her. I was on the couch, and she was stroking my hair, whispering, telling me to go to sleep. When I woke up in Corbin’s apartment the next morning, I couldn’t get her out of my head. I thought she had been a dream until I saw her purse in the living room.

I peeked inside her bedroom just to see if anyone was in the apartment with me. What I felt the moment I laid eyes on her was something I hadn’t felt since the moment I first laid eyes on Rachel.

I felt like I was floating. Her skin and her hair and her lips and the way she looked like an angel while I stood there and watched her brought back so many feelings that had become foreign to me over the past six years.

I had gone so long refusing to allow myself to feel anything for anyone.

Not that I could have controlled the feelings I was experiencing toward Tate that day. I couldn’t control them if I’d wanted to.

I know, because I tried.

I tried like hell.

But the second she opened her eyes and looked at me, I knew. She was either going to be the death of me . . . or she was going to be the one who finally brought me back to life.

The only problem I had with that was the fact that I didn’t want to be brought back to life. I was comfortable. Protecting myself from the possibility of experiencing what I had experienced in the past was my only priority. However, there were so many moments when I forgot what my only priority was supposed to be.

When I finally caved and kissed her, that was the point at which everything changed. I wanted so much more after experiencing that kiss with her. I wanted her mouth and her body and her mind, and the only reason I stopped was that I felt myself also wanting her heart. I was good at lying to myself, though. Convincing myself that I was strong enough to have her physically and no other way. I didn’t want to get hurt again, and I sure as hell didn’t want to hurt her.

I did anyway, though. I hurt her so much. More than once. Now I plan to spend a lifetime making it up to her.

I walk to my bed and sit on the edge of it. She feels the bed shift, and she opens her eyes but not all the way. A hint of a smile plays on her lips before she pulls the covers over her head and rolls over.

We officially began dating six months ago, and that’s been plenty long enough for me to realize she’s not at all a morning person. I lean forward and kiss the area of blanket covering up her ear.

“Wake up, sleepyhead,” I whisper.

She groans, so I lift the covers up and slide in behind her, wrapping myself around her. Her groan eventually turns into a soft moan.

“Tate, you need to get up. We have a plane to catch.”

That gets her attention.

She rolls over cautiously and pulls the covers from over our heads. “What the hell do you mean we have a plane to catch?”

I’m grinning, trying to contain my anticipation. “Get up, get dressed, let’s go.”

She’s eyeing me suspiciously, which makes total sense, considering it’s not even five o’clock in the morning yet. “I know you know how rare it is for me to have an entire day off, so this better be worth it.”

I laugh and give her a quick kiss. “That all depends on our ability to be punctual.” I stand up and pat the mattress several times with the palms of my hands. “So get up, get up, get up.”

She laughs and throws the covers off of her completely. She scoots to the edge of the bed, and I help her stand up. “It’s hard to stay irritated with you when you’re this giddy, Miles.”

???

We reach the lobby, and Cap is waiting at the elevator just as I asked him to. He has her juice in a to-go cup and our breakfast. I love the relationship they have. I was a little worried to reveal to Tate that I had known Cap all my life. When I finally told her, she was irritated with both of us. Mostly because she assumed Cap was telling me everything she confessed to him.

I assured her Cap wouldn’t do that.

I know he wouldn’t, because Cap is one of the few people in this world I trust.

He knew just the right things to say to me without appearing as though he were lecturing me or giving me advice. He’d always say just enough to make me think long and hard about my situation with Tate. Luckily, he’s one of the few people who grow wiser with age. He knew what he was doing with both of us all along.

“Morning, Tate,” he says to her, grinning from ear to ear. He holds out his arm for her to take, and she looks back and forth between us.

“What’s going on?” she asks Cap as he begins to walk her toward the lobby exit.