Toe the Line(18)

She cleared her throat. “As I was saying, we’re conditioned to think if we avoid eye contact, we’re somehow protecting ourselves, when in fact, we’re making it worse. That active avoidance alone is enough to make you anxious. So, as Fred, you’re not going to avoid eye contact.”

“How am I supposed to read off my paper and look at people at the same time? Because you know I’m not memorizing that shit.”

“You’ll just look up between sentences from time to time.”

“What if I lose my place? Then I’ll repeat the same line.” I laughed, even though I didn’t find that funny. “Can you imagine? I’m totally gonna do that.” I started to sweat just thinking about it.

“You’re catastrophizing now. Don’t do that, or we’ll have to develop another curriculum.”

“No more curriculums, teacher.”

She placed her hands on my shoulders, shaking me. “It’s gonna be fine. You’ll get to practice on me all summer. By the time you get to that event, it will be old hat.”

“Old hat.” I chuckled. “You talk like an old lady sometimes.”

“I do have an old soul.” She raised her chin proudly. “Thank you for noticing.”

I flashed a mischievous smile. “You know what else they say about public speaking?”

“What?”

“That you should picture your audience naked.”

She nodded. “Sure, that’s another strategy you could use.”

She hadn’t figured out what I was getting at. “So, if I’m going to be practicing on you all summer, that means…”

Noelle squinted when it hit her. “Ew.”

“Nothing I haven’t seen before, Miss America.”

She threw her pen at me and laughed. “Shut up.”

“I have to warn you, Fred is a bit of a perv.”

Her face turned red. “He’d better not be.”

“Even better, can I picture you with welts all over your skin?”

“No.”

Still chuckling, I got up from the bed. “Are we done for today?”

“Yeah.” She sighed. “We can be.” She tucked her notebook away in a drawer. “Lesson adjourned.”

She turned back around to face me, and I caught myself staring at her mouth. Wow. Let’s not do that again. I was attracted to Noelle, which was a little unnerving, since I knew I couldn’t go there. Not with this one. She was the only good thing in my life right now, and fucking that up was not an option. Plus, not only was she a family friend, we lived on different coasts. Also, I got the impression she was inexperienced. Aside from thinking she was adorable, though, for the first time in a long time, I felt a strong connection to someone.

“You were cute playing teacher,” I said.

She blushed. She did that a lot around me. I wondered if she had a little crush. Maybe that was wishful thinking. But it would be kind of fun to mess with her if she did. Make her blush even more.

I handed her the drawing I’d sketched while she was lecturing.

“What the heck?” She covered her mouth as she looked down at the image of herself. I’d dressed her in an evening gown featuring a sash that read Miss Whaite’s Island. Instead of a normal bouquet, in the drawing, Noelle held a giant penis bursting with flowers at the tip. In the bubble above her head, it said, The Seven Ps of Public Speaking.

? ? ?

The following night, Noelle wasn’t at dinner with our parents. I knew she was getting ready for her date with James, but I asked her mother where she was to seem nonchalant about it. When Amy told me her daughter had a date tonight, I acted like I was surprised.

I decided to go bug Noelle upstairs after I left the dining room. The door to her bedroom was open, and I looked in as she stood in front of the mirror.

Once again I decided to play dumb. “Where are you off to? You weren’t at dinner.”

She turned, looking surprised that I was so clueless. “I have that date with James, remember?”

When I got a full look at her, it took my breath away for a moment. Noelle wore a form-fitting shirt that displayed a little cleavage, along with a black leather miniskirt. There was no denying how freaking hot she looked.

But I pretended not to notice. “Oh, that’s right. Where’s he taking you again?”

She resumed brushing her long, brown hair. “Some fish and chips place.”

“Ah. Nothing sexier on a first date than greasy food seeping out your pores.”

“I suppose you take Bree to the fancy places?”

I lay back on her bed. “Bree and I don’t really go anywhere. We’re not dating.”

“That’s right. You’re just hooking up.”

I sat up. “You say that like there’s something wrong with it.”

“There’s not.”

“I don’t believe you. I feel judged. Do I need to transform into Fred right now?”

She laughed. “I swear I’m not judging you.”

“I don’t believe in leading people on,” I said. “I can’t have a girlfriend over the summer and break up with her before I go back to school. There’s no way in hell I’m doing a long-distance relationship, either. So, it’s either be alone for the summer or have an agreement with someone that we’re just hooking up.”