Through My Window (Hidalgos #1)(43)

As I get closer to the house, I thank God it’s Sunday, and I don’t have to go to school feeling like shit. I’m surprised to see Dani in the driveway ringing the doorbell. She’s wearing a loose summer dress, with her long black hair tied up in a ponytail and sunglasses on her face. She looks impatient. I know she hates the heat. I try to call out to her, but I can’t. The words stick in my throat, and I want to cry again. My lips tremble as she turns and sees me.

She takes off her glasses, and her face tightens in concern. She hurries over to me and grabs me by the shoulders. “What happened? Are you okay?”

I just manage to nod.

“God, let’s go inside.”

In my room, I don’t bother to hold back my tears, not anymore. I sit on the floor against the wall and cry. Dani sits next to me, saying nothing, just sitting there, and that’s all I need. I don’t need words of encouragement, I just need her to be there, next to me.

I need to let it all out. I need to get this pain out of my chest, and I feel that by crying I can externalize it so that it never hurts like this again. There is something therapeutic in crying with all my heart. There is a certain peace that comes afterward.

Dani slips her arm behind me and grabs me so that I rest my head on her shoulder. “Let it out. That’s it. I’m here.”

I cry until I have no more tears, and my nose is so stuffed up that it’s hard to breathe. The peace settles over me. Dani kisses my head.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

I push myself away from her and straighten up, pressing my back against the wall. I wipe away my tears and blow my nose. I tell her everything.

Dani’s face turns red with rage. “Fucking jerk! Argh!”

I don’t say anything.

She blows an unruly strand of hair out of her face. “I want to punch him in his stupid face. Can I? Just one punch and I’ll run. He won’t even notice.”

“Dani . . .”

“I learned a superpunch in my self-defense class, I know it will hurt, and there’s always the typical punch in the balls. Oh yeah, I think I prefer that one.”

Her crazy anger steals a sad smile from me. “I appreciate the effort, but . . .”

“Or I can tell Dean. They’re on the soccer team together. I’ll tell him to give him a kick that looks accidental.”

“Dani, you can’t send your brother to beat him up. Dean is very passive.”

“But also excessively overprotective, I only have to tell him that Ares did something to you and boom! Ares gets what he deserves.”

“I don’t like violence, and you know it.”

“Fine!” she snorts. “I’ll get some ice cream, and you find the most romantic movie you can get online.”

“I don’t think—”

“Silence! Let’s deal with this anger as it should be. Today you will cry and shout insults at the movie screen and talk about how unfair life is because those things don’t happen to us.” She puts her hands on her hips. “We’ll have a sleepover, and tomorrow you’ll wake up a new person, leaving everything behind.”

I try to smile. “I don’t think I can do that overnight.”

“At least give it a try, and then we’ll go party with some guys. You’ll get distracted and realize that idiot isn’t the only guy on this planet. Are we clear?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“I didn’t hear you.”

“Yes, ma’am!”

“Okay, now look for that movie, I’ll be right back.”

I watch her leave and smile like a fool, grateful to have her by my side, otherwise I would be falling apart. I think what upsets me the most is that, even knowing what my mother had to go through with my father, I still fell for that idiot. Just another girl, blinded by love. I’m disappointed in myself.

I turn on my computer and open the browser to search for a movie. My Facebook automatically opens while I type into the address bar. I hear a new message ring and my heart crumples in my chest when I see the name and message.

Ares Hidalgo: Sorry.

A sad smile crosses my lips. I leave it on seen and simply continue my search. It rings again and I open his next message:

Ares Hidalgo: I am truly sorry.

I click his name and block him so that he can’t send me any more messages.

Good-bye, Greek God.





TWENTY-THREE


   The Soccer Game




Soccer: the most popular sport in the world and one of my favorites. I don’t know when I developed a passion for watching the games. Maybe it started the day I saw Ares playing in his backyard, or maybe it was when Dani’s mom took us to see Dean play in his first game. In any case, I enjoy it, and I didn’t hesitate when Dani asked if I wanted to go with her, Carlos, and Yoshi to another of Dean’s games to support him. With all my being, I try to forget that Ares is also on the team, and that means I’ll see him for the first time since that terrible morning.

I won’t deny that it’s been a difficult few days, especially at night when I close my eyes. I can’t help replaying everything over and over again, as if trying to find the moment or the reason why everything ended up like this. There were even times when I took some of the blame. He warned me. He was very clear about what he wanted, but I still gave myself to him not only once but twice. I’ve found myself staring at the window sometimes, not daring to look out and peek at his house. It’s painful to remember him climbing up the ladder, his smirk, his eyes, all of him there with me in my room.