These Vicious Masks: A Swoon Novel(8)

“Rose, that’s highly unlikely. And your reputation won’t even be an issue soon—future matters shall be a bit easier.”

She tilted her head and squinted her eyes.

“Robert would be rather understanding. . . .” I added.

Her lips pursed. She still had no idea what I was talking about.

“And I may have told him tonight that I assumed you would marry him, which is actually an ideal—”

“Evelyn! You didn’t!” she exclaimed, stiffening.

“I’m afraid I did. I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking and it just came out that I hoped you and Robert would be married shortly.”

“But he’s like a brother to me—to us. Where—how did you even get the idea I have feelings for him?”

It was my turn to be confused. I didn’t even know where to begin that list. “The endless hours you two spend together. The glances you give each other. Whenever we have a dinner party, you prefer his company over anyone else’s,” I insisted.

“You sound like Mother now,” she said, slightly impatient. “None of that means I want to marry him. I don’t wish to marry him—or any man, for that matter!”

I was the worst sister. I considered self-defenestration.

“I always assumed you were teasing when you spoke about Robert in that way,” she continued.

I sank back against the window’s drapes miserably. “And I always assumed there was an understanding.”

She frowned and paced before finally settling down on one spot on the rug. “Well, I will simply have to tell him you were mistaken.”

“The man has been in love with you ever since I can remember,” I pointed out lightly. “It’s not like declining an invitation to a picnic. You have to be careful how you say it.”

She glanced over at Father’s desk and sighed. “Yes, I’ll have to prepare something so I don’t say the wrong thing—”

“I’m so sorry to have to put you in this position. I can help you—”

“No, don’t be, it’s quite all right. If he really is in love with me, we would have had the discussion at some point,” she insisted. “I’m glad you brought up the matter. I simply don’t want to hurt him.”

Poor Robert. He’ll be devastated. I tried not to think of the horrid poems that would spill from his fevered brain.

“But I cannot allow marriage to impede my work,” Rose said, standing up with new resolve. “I must become a doctor. I must study in London so I can help people like Mr. Cheval.

“If I settle this with Robert tomorrow morning, I should also speak to Mother. I cannot allow her to interfere with my nursing as she did this evening. I didn’t protest her restrictions when she made them—I was happy to be treating any patients. But lately, I’ve been reading Mr. Darwin’s journals, and, well, he was only able to learn by traveling and venturing to a new place. That was how he formulated his brilliant ideas.”

Rose spun Father’s globe with a great push as if she wanted to leave at that very moment. Her words came out with a speed to match it as she explained all the difficulties that female doctors encountered in trying to get an education, take the certification test, and find a place to practice. “Oh, I wish I could do the same!” she said. “There are too many sick and poor all over the world and not nearly enough doctors to help. If only Mother would allow me.”

“You have a better chance of persuading her than anyone else,” I said. “Besides, what is one more mad daughter to her?”

“I should thank you for going mad first, for it makes me look rather sane,” Rose replied with a laugh.

I unfolded my legs to let them dangle, but my feet kept hitting the floor. It took everything within me to refrain from complaining about my own situation. At least Rose had her passion. She knew her precise goals and the obstacles standing in her way. It was a difficult path, no doubt, but it was still a path, and that was enviable. I could not be a doctor like her, and I had no desire to run a household like my mother. What else was there to do? And how would I ever find out if Mother refused to let me see more of the world?

“Ev, you’ll figure it out,” Rose said, sitting down by my side. She saw through me with her piercing eyes, guessing exactly what bothered me. “There’s still plenty of time. And Mr. Kent is quite understanding.”

“What do you mean?”

Rose giggled. “That man is in love with you. And he would certainly be a wonderful companion in your world travels!” Something hot ran through me, starting at the crown of my head.

“I can’t imagine Mr. Kent ever marrying. That’s why I thought we got along so well.”

“Well, if anyone can convince him, it’s you.”

Mother had always argued that there was more freedom during marriage than before. But I had never considered that an actual possibility until this moment.

Rose smiled mischievously. “It looks like we both have a lot of thinking to do, men to turn down . . . or not turn down.”

“Indeed, it is exhausting being so in demand, is it not?” I asked archly.

“Speaking of which, I think it’s bedtime. I can barely stand after all that dancing.”

A yawn took over my mouth. “And all that hiding from dancing has exhausted me.”