These Twisted Bonds (These Hollow Vows, #2)(68)

“Where are you going?” I ask.

“I’m meeting with Juliana. We need to discuss a few things before I meet with my general.”

Jealousy rears inside my chest, making me feel ugly and small, and I bow my head to hide it. “Be careful.”

He chuckles. “Watch out, Princess. I might start to think you care.”



Juliana leans across the table, refilling all our glasses before straightening and hoisting her own in the air. “I’d like to make a toast,” she says, flashing that dazzling smile all around the room before letting it rest on Finn. “To our prince, who we always knew would come home.” She hoists her glass higher.

“May the road take you exactly where you need to go and always bring you back to us.”

“Hear! Hear!” Kane shouts, pounding his fist on the table.

We all gathered for dinner at a large table situated on the beautifully landscaped stone terrace behind the house—Finn, Pretha, Kane, Tynan, Misha, Juliana, and me. The food was delicious, especially after the day’s long ride, and everyone seems to be having a great time, but the whole night has left me feeling lonely.

I smile politely and take a sip of my wine. I’m the odd man out here. The only one who doesn’t understand how Finn fits into this world, the only one who hasn’t known him for decades or more.

I’m focused on my thoughts, so I barely realize that Kane has leaned closer until I hear him whisper in my ear. “You don’t need to be jealous, Princess.”

I stiffen. “What? I’m not—”

He chuckles. “He doesn’t look at Juliana the way she wants him to. Never has.” His voice is so quiet, I’d never be able to hear him if it weren’t for these fae ears. Still, I look around to make sure no one else is listening.

“I’m not jealous about anything,” I say, but then Juliana makes a liar out of me. Instead of returning to her seat, she plops herself into Finn’s lap and loops an arm behind his neck. Finn grins at her, as if having her in his lap is the most natural thing in the world. I give Kane a tight smile and push back from the table. “Excuse me. I need to stretch my legs.”

Kane shakes his head and mutters something under his breath about females.

The air is cool and the sky is clear, and the minute I’m out of sight of the rest of the group, my muscles loosen. I know I’m being childish. My jealousy is unreasonable and unwanted. I shouldn’t feel this way, but feelings very rarely care about should and shouldn’t.

Kane was trying to help, but he doesn’t understand my emotions right now. Sure, I’m jealous, but not just of Juliana and whatever relationship Finn has with her; I’m jealous of the rest of them too. Of the community and friendships they have that I never will. I’m jealous that they get to see their family when my only family is in another realm where I’ll never be welcome. I’m jealous that they can give something back to this world when the best I can hope for is to fix what my very existence has broken.

I’m at the stables before I even realize where I was headed. Two Star neighs and tosses her head when she catches sight of me. “You think I brought you treats, sweet girl?” I ask, reaching into my pocket. I open my palm and offer her one of the sugar cubes I snatched from the tea setting.

Two Star gobbles it up, and I stroke her nose before bending to grab her brush.

Juliana’s stable hands have taken good care of her, but I let myself into the stall anyway. I brush her soft coat, enjoying the ritual of grooming her—the soft swish of the brush and the flick of her tail in the night breeze. I may not have any family or friends in this whole realm, but I feel a little less alone out here with my horse.

“How’d I know I’d find you in here?” Finn asks.

I don’t have to turn to know who it is. He could’ve entered without speaking and I would’ve felt him. My power hums when he’s around. I smile a bit, happy with the new knowledge that he feels this connection too. “This girl’s got me wrapped around her finger,” I say.

He comes to my side and strokes her velvety black coat. “You were quiet at dinner.”

I cut my eyes to him without turning my head. “I thought we weren’t putting on airs for this group.

Did you need me to give a speech?”

“No. Of course not. I was just worried that you were . . . uncomfortable.”

I shake my head. Tears burn the back of my eyes. How can I explain this to him? In light of everything else that’s happening, it seems so foolish, petty even. How can I complain about my loneliness or my fears for my future? How I fear that now I’ve turned fae, I’ll never fit in anywhere.

The only thing more embarrassing than that would be complaining that I never have.

I swallow it all back. “They call this place your home. You weren’t raised in the palace?”

He stares at me a long moment, and I can see him contemplating whether to push me about dinner.

Instead, he sighs and lets it drop. “Yes and no. My mother was raised here and kept a home here, but we visited only occasionally while she was alive.”

“And after she passed?” I ask.

“After she passed, my father left my mother’s sister in charge of raising my brother and me, and she believed we would grow to be better leaders if we were raised in our mother’s home. Vexius and I spent more time here than anywhere else.”