The Wrong Bride (The Windsors, #1)(60)
“Even if what I’m asking for is your body? Your devotion? Passion? What if what I want is everything that used to be hers?”
He smiles as he caresses my cheek with the back of his fingers. “I’m yours,” he repeats. “And there’s nothing I’d rather do than make you mine in return.”
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Raven
I can barely think straight as Ares pulls up in front of our house, my thoughts ruled by desire and fear in equal parts. His lips felt perfect against mine, and that kiss was everything I’ve ever wanted. This one was different somehow. It was even better than the memory that sustained my love for him for so many years, yet it wasn’t enough. It’s odd how much more intimate a single kiss can be, compared to everything else we’ve done.
Ares seems on edge as he walks around the car, his expression unreadable. He offers me his hand, and I take it hesitantly. Never in a million years did I think we’d find ourselves together in this way, yet part of me feels like we were inevitable.
My fingers curl around his, and he holds onto me tightly as we walk to our front door, an unfamiliar tension filling the distance between us. I’m scared he’s already regretting kissing me, or that he only did it because he feels like it’s part of his duties as my husband. The way he’s been touching me lately… I want it to be real. I know how much he values marriage, and it wouldn’t surprise me if he’s chosen to put my needs above his because of it. That isn’t what I want. I want all of him, truly, fully, and freely given.
If there’s even a small chance he’ll regret being with me in this way, then I need to back away before it’s too late. Before I destroy all we’ve got.
Ares unlocks our door with his thumb and we walk in, my hand falling out of his as the door closes behind us.
“Ares,” I whisper, my heart aching even as a deep need for him holds me in its clutches. “I have a tendency to overthink things, so communication is really important to me. I’ll drive myself crazy if I keep trying to guess what you’re thinking, and I don’t want to constantly be scared that I’m overstepping or that I’m making you uncomfortable. The last time I made a move, you rejected me and told me you’d never want me, and it’s left my heart bruised and my confidence shaken. Things have changed between us since then, but I need to know that I’m not just an obligation to you. So I’m going to ask you a question, just once. If your answer is no, I’ll go to bed and we’ll both pretend nothing ever happened.”
He nods, his expression carrying a hint of intrigue.
“Do you truly want me? If we weren’t married, would you want me?”
He smiles and walks toward me, his stride confident and impatient. His arm wraps around my waist, and he pulls me into him, his lips finding mine with the same urgency he portrayed earlier. Ares groans as he kisses me, his hands moving over my body impatiently. I’m pushed against the wall, and his hand curls around my thigh as he hooks it around his hip and pushes up against me.
I’m panting as he pulls his lips off mine to kiss my jaw, before placing them just below my ear, pressing a soft kiss to my neck that makes me shiver. “Is that enough of an answer, Raven? I want you so fucking badly that it hurts.” His teeth graze over my ear, his breathing ragged. “I’ve dreamed of your pussy far more often than I’d dare admit, for far longer than I ever should have.”
His hands move to my waist, and he lifts me up against the wall, my legs wrapping around his hips to support myself. “You feel that, baby? Can you feel how hard you make me? You drive me fucking crazy. You always have.”
One of his hands moves to my ass, and he grips tightly as his lips move back to mine. “Open,” he orders, and I part my lips for him, deepening our kiss. My hands start to roam over his back, up, until I’ve got them buried in his hair, my nails brushing over his scalp, quietly conveying my rising need.
He groans against my mouth and carries me toward the living room, knocking over something in the hallway, but not even the sound of something shattering on the floor pulls us apart. If anything, it just increases his urgency.
Ares’s hands move underneath my dress until he’s gripping my ass with his bare hands. “Fuck,” he moans against my lips. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this. I haven’t stopped thinking about that massage I gave you. Baby, I’ve wanted to slip my hands underneath your nightgown for longer than you can imagine. You knew exactly what you were doing to me when you wore that sexy sleepwear for me, didn’t you?”
I nod, my cheeks flaming. “I was trying to seduce you, but I guess I’m not very good at it.”
He places me on our bed and positions himself between my spread legs. “You’re far better at it than I let on, baby. I’m practically always hard around you. You’re not the only one that overthinks things, Rave. You’re the most important woman in my life, and there’s no way I was going to do anything that would upset you. I’d already asked enough of you by making you marry me, and I didn’t dare ask for anything else… but that doesn’t mean I didn’t want it.”
He leans in, his lips hovering over mine. “Let me show you what it means to be my wife, Raven.”
Ares captures my bottom lip between his teeth, teasing, sucking, until he’s finally kissing me again. “You have no idea how many times I’ve dreamed of your lips, baby.”