The Wrath of Cain (The Syndicate, #1)(38)

He begins to caress my cheek once again. The effect of his hand stroking my face is relaxing. I could easily fall asleep like this. I just want to slip into my own world and process all that has happened today.

“And Manny?” I ask.

He hesitates for a moment too long.

“Shit.”

The way he said the word shit sends a nauseous sensation to my stomach, without me even knowing why, I can already feel this is going to be another blow to my heart. Another chunk of my chest cut open. I come to my senses and jerk away from him, standing up.

He’s looking at me with pity. I hate pity. It’s the worst emotion ever. Pity is for the weak, and considering everything I have found out and overcome in the past day and a half, the last damn thing I want is pity.

“Don’t look at me like that,” I grit out. “I’m not a charity case. I fell apart once and I refuse to do it again, so tell me, what does Manny have to do with this?”

“Calla... Manny’s your cousin. He’s Salvatore’s son.”





Chapter Thirteen


Cain



I’ve studied her face for the past two hours. Watched it go from happy to sad, to pain and betrayal. There are no words, nothing to try and describe the look on her face right now. I couldn’t muster up a word to save my ass right now. I do the only thing I know. I go to her. Fold her into my arms. Soothing her, my hands smoothing down her messy hair.

“I’m not sure what to do or say here,” I murmur, speaking into her hair.

“I don’t know what to say, either. For my entire life, my parents always put me first. I know they love me, and that they want me safe and happy, but this... this doesn’t make me happy. Nor does it make me feel safe. It makes me feel furious and hateful. It’s like the two people who helped mold me into who I am are not the people I thought they were. They’re strangers, not my parents. And my dad... I just don’t understand how he could do what he does. I don’t know what any of you expect of me now.”

The sound of her voice is flat and dull, and her body quivers in my arms. She needs time. How much time, is up to her. Until then, I will give her the space she needs and try to come up with a plan to get us both away from here to a place where she can relax. Ease her mind. Fuck, I don’t know what the hell to do.

She’s my top priority. Once I know she can handle the things she’s learned, then only time will tell if she’s willing to lead this kind of life, the life on the other side of the tracks she was just referring to. She’s the one who has to step over into unknown territory and give up her dream of being on the right side of the law.

Calla has to choose. Her family or her freedom. Those are her only two options. If she decides she can’t live her life knowing the things we do and learn to accept them, then I have to let her go. I’m going right in this fork in the road. She could go left, and I would never stop loving her, always being there in the background making sure she’s safe. My love for her is unconditional. It will exist forever. The thought of her marrying someone else, building a life with someone else, is unfathomable to me. I’d rather die than lose her.

I lightly brush my lips across her forehead and down her flushed face to the sensitive corners of her eyes. The bridge of her nose. I do all this while holding her delicate face in the palms of my hands. Reaching her lips, I make sure the pressure I apply on them is not demanding, but friendly and understanding. She sighs and kisses me back tenderly.

“Let me go get all your stuff from the porch.”

“No, not right now. I want to stay like this for a bit longer.”

“Sounds good to me,” I say softly, drumming my fingers down to the hem of my t-shirt. “I hated this shirt up until now. Now it’s my favorite.”

She hums into my chest in agreement.

“It is ugly, isn’t it?”

“It was. Now, it’s not only my new favorite, it’s also one I’m very jealous of.”

I stop talking and splay my hand wide across her smooth stomach. I can feel her flesh break out into tiny goose bumps. She sucks in a breath.

“The truth is, if I could be anything right now, baby, I would be this shirt.”

I tilt her head back so we make eye contact.

“You’re crazy,” she smiles weakly.

“Been called worse.”

My eyes never leave hers. She is looking at me right now as if I’m her world. As if I could make all of this disappear. If only I truly could.

When I look down her body, her nipples start to poke out. I know full well I could take advantage and have her beneath me in a matter of minutes, but I won’t. When I have her again, it won’t be just carnal f*cking. We can f*ck anytime we want. I both need and want to make love to my wife.

“So tell me, why would you be this shirt?” she asks playfully. Her sense of humor is one thing I definitely missed about her.

“It’s resting up against your heart. A heart I hope belongs to me. Or at least, will again.”

A smile slants the corner of her sinfully delicious mouth.

“I told you. You aren’t as much of a badass as you think you are.”

“I’m well known as a hard-ass and a bastard to all of those people out there. I may have pushed you a little too hard when you first got here. Said shit to you I didn’t mean. But I can’t be that with you,” I say solemnly. “Just don’t tell any of them, or you’ll really get that spanking I warned you about. Now, I think you need some time to yourself.”