The Stand-In Boyfriend (Grove Valley High #1)(28)

I shake my head. Him saying that will just reiterate how stupid I already feel about getting this worked up and will only add to my anxiety. This is why Sophie is so good in these situations. She just knows me. She gets me and doesn’t try to make me feel any different than I already do. She just accepts me for how I am until I manage to finally snap out of it.

“So, what do you usually do when you get stressed like this?”

I shrug. “Sophie’s usually around and I just listen to her until I relax.”

He grins. “Well I’m not sure I have Sophie’s conversation skills—I mean, I’m not sure anyone does.” I smile at this. He’s right—Sophie could talk to a brick wall; she’s never without something to say. “What do you do when it’s just you and you’re feeling like this?”

I frown. What do I do? This has been happening less and less recently. It’s nothing like when I was in the seventh grade and had my complete meltdown that triggered my mom shipping me off to the child psychologist. I’m much better at dealing with stress and change than I’ve ever been, and honestly I’ve been much better at calming myself down. Sophie and Jessie have always been a big part of that. In a way, they’re my coping mechanism, and they helped me get through my tough times. I guess that’s why it’s started flaring up again—Jessie is the reason for it now, not the one who can distract me and pull me out of it. He’s actually the reason this is the worst I’ve felt in a really long time.

“Um, I don’t know. I exercise, I guess—go for a run, play soccer, basketball.”

His face lights up. “Why didn’t you say so?” He jumps out of his seat and leaves the room, leaving me looking after him in surprise and feeling kinda awkward being in this huge room by myself. He returns five minutes later dressed in running shorts, a Grove Valley gym shirt, and sneakers with a pile of clothes in his hands that he promptly passes over to me.

When I don’t immediately understand what he’s implying, he rolls his eyes. “My sister is about the same size as you. You can borrow her shorts, the shirt is an old one of mine, and the sneakers are brand new.”

“You want to go for a run?”

He snorts back a laugh. “Well, yeah. I go for one a day anyway, and it might help you relax.”

I stare at the pile of clothes he shoved into my hands. “I can’t wear your sister’s stuff.”

He shrugs. “She has three closets full of clothes and doesn’t even live here full time anymore—that’s how much clothing she owns. She wouldn’t notice if half of them went missing.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Three closets?”

He smirks. “Yup, and she’s at college now so she has stuff there too.”

“She really wouldn’t mind?”

“Nope. Come on, get changed.”

I stare at the clothes for another minute before deciding. Eventually, I figure, what the hell? I’m willing to try anything to push this anxiety away. I quickly stand and go to a bathroom off to the side to get changed. The running shorts are definitely shorter than I’m used to, but the shoes fit perfectly. Chase’s old shirt almost hits the bottom of the shorts and is so loose I know I won’t feel self-conscious when running. I leave the room and find him waiting by his front door.

His eyes drop briefly to my bare legs but before I can begin to feel awkward, he’s opened the front door and is already halfway out. “Come on,” he calls back over his shoulder.

We walk down the path and he asks how far I want to run. I shrug and tell him I usually do a four-or five-mile jog every day. He face lights up like I’ve just announced he’s joining a pro team, and he takes off down the sidewalk, challenging me to keep up with him.

I take a couple of long strides to catch up then fall into step with him, the familiar smack of feet against the sidewalk oddly comforting. It only takes a couple of minutes before my mind becomes calm and it spreads throughout my body. The only thing I think about as I run is matching my breathing to my stride. Chase kicks up the pace and I match him step for step, feeling the familiar stretch of my muscles as I push myself to go faster. I don’t let up, matching him step for step, and after fifteen minutes, it’s gone. The anxiety and stress of the day is gone, and I feel better than I have since this whole thing with Jessie blew up at Aaron’s party. I glance over at Chase and he must sense it because he looks over at me and grins. I grin back. It’s actually nice to run with somebody for a change. Sophie wouldn’t be caught dead exercising in public, and Jessie isn’t fast enough. It’s nice to have somebody push you.

Chase lets me know when we need to turn since I don’t know the route, but apart from that, we’re silent. We don’t need to talk, and that makes it even better for me. I don’t have to think about what to say to him or worry about how boring I appear to him. Not for the first time, Chase Mitchell surprises me by making me feel comfortable in silence. It’s strange how you have all these ideas about someone just because they’re well known at school, but actually they’re not what you perceive them to be at all.

“Last mile,” Chase suddenly barks out, and without warning, he accelerates forward.

I lengthen my stride to catch him, punching my arms back and forth until I eventually manage to come up level with him. We’re matching each other stride for stride and my breathing becomes ragged as I try to push forward and onward. This is what it’s about—this competitive edge. Nothing else compares for me. I may have trouble standing up for myself and struggle with anxiety and disbelief on a daily basis, but what I am is an athlete and I always aim to win, no matter what. I use this drive to dig deep and stretch out ahead of him, keeping up the pace. I can feel him just a step behind me, his own breathing labored as he tries to catch up, and when I see his car just up ahead, I know we’re almost back to his house. I try to stay ahead just for this last bit so I can control something. I might not be able to control Jessie or Courtney and the way they feel about each other, but I can control my body and I can make sure I leave nothing out here—even if it is just a jog around Chase’s neighborhood.