The Randy Romance Novelist(13)
Right when I thought he was going to lay his paw on the couch, Henry came through the front door, scaring the jerk away from the bullseye I had aimed between his eerie yellow eyes.
“Hey, love,” Henry started to say, until he stopped and took in my appearance. Shutting the door, he said, “Whatcha doin’?” The sexy side smile of his eased the tension in my shoulders just enough for me to lower the water sprayer.
“He’s here,” I shout-whispered, looking around, waiting for him to attack. “Cover my six.” I backed up, searching the room for an orange blob ready to pounce, but my eyes deceived me, sending me into a full-on water attack on an orange pillow resting on the floor from one of the run arounds I shared with Sir Licks-a-Lot.
Henry carefully set his work bag down and looked around the living room, while lowering my squirting hands away from the pillow. “Who’s here?”
Crouch walking, I inched closer to Henry, scanning the room, waiting for Sir Licks-a-Lot to pop out. “Lucifer himself. He’s here.” I felt the crazy in my eyes starting to surface, the day of chasing him around, plucking him off the furniture, and screaming bloody murder to make him stop his incessant crying had finally taken over. I was losing it.
“Love, you’re scaring me. What are you talking—?”
Mrrrrrrrrrrooooooowwwwww!
From behind the curtains, Sir Licks-a-Lot pounced from the ground and into the air, fanning his body out to impersonate a flying squirrel, propelling him across the living room and onto Henry’s chest.
“What the f*ck?” Henry screamed as he spun in circles, trying to get rid of the phantom clawer. “I don’t understand what’s happening right now.”
Spiraling around the room, Henry pulled on Sir Licks-a-Lot, trying to forcefully remove the carrot-colored clinger.
“Get off my man, you orange *!”
I lifted the bottle of water, aimed the best I could, and sprayed water rapidly while screaming for Sir Licks-a-Lot to declaw himself from Henry.
“Why am I getting wet? Rosie, aim at the cat, for the love of God, aim at the cat.”
The struggle escalated, the twisting was out of control, and for a brief moment I wondered if the end of this battle would result in a hospital visit.
“Stop spinning!”
Immediately, Henry listened to my demand, giving me the perfect moment to throw down my nuclear weapon. I pulled off the cap to the water sprayer and chucked the entire bottle at Henry, just in time for Sir Licks-a-Lot to jump off him, resulting in Henry taking the brunt of the water straight to the noggin.
In shock, Henry stood in front of me, drenched from head to toe, with his hands stretched out and a look of utter confusion on his face. Next to him sat Sir Licks-a-Lot, cupping the water on the ground and slowly bringing his paw up to his mouth to lap up a tasty Henry flavored drink, as if our entryway floor was his own personal watering hole.
Henry wiped his face and then asked, “Love, can I ask what that thing is doing in our apartment?”
This was one conversation I wasn’t looking forward to. I knew Henry wasn’t going to be happy about our new roommate.
“Honestly, I don’t know how it happened. Last thing I can remember is Gladys looking up at me, begging me to take Sir Licks-a-Lot home.”
“But why?”
“All the cats were removed, something about furballs in the air ducts. She needed a place for him to stay.”
“And you were chosen for that?” Henry asked, obviously irritated over the new resident in the building. The feeling was mutual.
“I was the only one who could allow cats in their apartment. She called the landlord, Henry. What was I supposed to do?”
“Say no.” We both watched Sir Licks-a-Lot rub up against Henry’s pants, marking his territory. If I wasn’t so scared of the feline, I would let him know that Henry wasn’t available for marking, but honestly, I was too scared I would lose an eyeball, so I kept my distance.
“I couldn’t. She cornered me and then offered me three hundred dollars more a paycheck to take care of him. I didn’t have a choice. Please don’t be mad at me.”
Despite my sad attempt at explaining why there was now a cat in our apartment, Henry continued to look irritated and frustrated. I didn’t like that look . . . at all.
The entire day bubbled over on me and my emotional well-being snapped. Tears flooded my eyes while I dropped to the floor, completely exhausted and emotionally worn out.
Before I had a chance to take a breath, Henry scooped me off the floor and took me into our bedroom, where he shut the door, partitioning off any access Lucifer would have to us.
Henry laid me down on the bed and then quickly stripped himself down so he was only in his boxer briefs. Hovering over me, he undid my hair from my ponytail and removed my clothing so I was only in my underwear and bra. He climbed into bed next to me and pulled me into his chest, where I rested my head and held onto him tightly.
“I’m not mad at you, Rosie. I’m sorry if it seemed like that. I just wasn’t expecting to come home to four sets of claws to my chest.”
“I don’t think anyone is prepared for that.” We both laughed, the deep rumble of his chuckle vibrated through his chest and into my soul. Lying there with Henry still felt like a dream come true. It was sometimes almost too good to be true, that I’d been so lucky as to fall in love with my best friend, my hot and super sexy best friend.