The Poison Season(13)

Leelo’s stomach twisted at the idea of luring this hapless stranger into the lake. “He hasn’t done anything. And he didn’t see the ceremony. I’m sure of it.”

“Why are you protecting him?” Sage asked, arms folded across her chest. “We protect Endla, above all else.”

And Endla protects us, Leelo finished silently. “I just... I really don’t think he’s here to harm the Forest.” For some reason, she didn’t want to tell Sage about the hatchling. It felt like a secret, a good one, and Sage would find a way to twist it. “Let’s go back.” She didn’t feel like celebrating anymore, but she wanted to leave before Sage insisted they do something about the outsider.

Sage followed Leelo away from the lake, but her expression hadn’t changed. Leelo wished she could tell Sage what she was thinking, tell her all the thoughts that had sprung up when she saw the man save the bird. She wanted to understand how broken Isola was over Pieter, and why he’d had to die, and why Tate had to leave.

But they had rejoined the others, and Leelo decided to check on Isola, who stood staring out at the horizon, her eyes as empty as the waters of Lake Luma.

That night, Leelo lay awake for hours, watching shadows move across her ceiling in the moonlight. She could tell from Sage’s breathing that she was also having a hard time falling asleep. They had to be up early for Watcher duty, and they should be exhausted. But for some reason, sleep refused to come.

“I’m not sure I ever want to fall in love,” Sage said suddenly.

Leelo gave a tiny, involuntary gasp. “Why?”

“Because I don’t want to give up a part of myself for someone. Look what it did to Isola,” she added.

Leelo’s eyes widened, but she didn’t respond; she was afraid any reaction would frighten Sage back into her shell. This was the first time she’d ever revealed something so personal, and Leelo held her breath, hoping she’d say more.

“Isola was fine before him,” Sage continued. “She was free and happy, just like us. And now it’s like part of her died along with Pieter.”

“But maybe it’s worth it,” Leelo ventured after a moment. “To feel a love like that.”

Sage stiffened beside her, and Leelo was afraid she’d pushed her too far. “How can it be love, if it kills you?”

Leelo thought of her mother, of her quiet resolve and steadfastness. Of Tate, who only wanted to love and be loved in return. If the knowledge that she had people like that in her life made Leelo less afraid, then more love could only be a good thing. “I don’t think love kills you. Not often, anyway. Love makes people stronger.”

“I don’t think my mother ever really loved my father, and she’s the strongest woman I know,” Sage said defensively.

Leelo was quiet for a long time, but finally, she worked up the nerve to roll toward her cousin. “I want to tell you something, but I’m afraid you’ll be angry.”

Sage softened and reached out, placing her hand on Leelo’s shoulder. “You’re my best friend, Lo. You can tell me anything. Even if it’s about that man by the shore.”

Leelo rolled onto her back again. Sage was too perceptive sometimes. “I saw him save a bird that fell into the lake. He tried to, anyway. But it was already dead. He buried it.”

“So?”

Leelo sat up and looked down at Sage. “If outsiders are so terrible, if all they want is to destroy our Forest, why would he make the effort to bury a hatchling?”

“Don’t tell me you were protecting that boy just because of a stupid bird,” Sage moaned. “Do I think that some outsiders are better than others? Of course. Saints know that some islanders are better than others.”

“But your mother hates all of them.”

Now Sage sat up, her voice hardening. “You don’t know anything about my mother.”

“Then tell me,” Leelo said. “Why does she hate the outsiders so much?”

Sage stared at her for a moment, as if she might have something to say, but instead she lay back down and rolled away from Leelo. “Just go to sleep. We’re on the early shift tomorrow.”

Leelo could tell that Sage wasn’t anywhere close to sleeping; her breathing was fast and angry. She waited a few minutes and then left the room, padding quietly down the stairs. She opened the door to Tate’s room and slipped into the dark space, crouching to avoid hitting her head on the sloped ceiling. Tate slept on a mattress on the floor, and it was easy to kneel onto it, lift the blanket, and crawl in next to her brother.

“Hello,” he murmured sleepily.

“I’m sorry I woke you.”

He turned toward her, his eyes shiny in the dark. “Are you all right? Mama said the ceremony went well.”

“I’m fine. I just wanted to see you.”

“We don’t have much time left,” he whispered.

She swallowed the lump in her throat. “We’ll make the most of it.”

Tate was quiet for long enough that Leelo thought he must be on the edge of sleep, but then he spoke again. “Is it true that we can really never see each other again once I leave?”

Leelo bit her lip to stifle a sob. Her prayers hadn’t worked, and neither had her sacrifice. What would it take, she wondered, to appease the Forest? A flock of birds? An entire caribou?