The Magnolia Inn(28)

“No, there was a woman at the bar who . . .” She paused.

“Who what?” he asked.

“Mama,” she said. “She reminded me of my mother. Not in looks, but in actions. I tried to close that chapter in my life a long time ago, but it keeps risin’ to the surface.”

“Want to talk about it?” Tucker understood exactly what she was talking about.

Jolene was quiet for so long that he figured she didn’t want to say anything, but then she began to talk. “She was on a guilt trip from the time my daddy died. He probably had the heart attack because he was stressed out, working two jobs to keep her in her fancy jeans and a new car every year. And even that wasn’t enough. His insurance policy paid off the credit cards, but she lost the car and the house. We moved into a trailer and she went to work at a grocery store there in town. Her guilt sent her into a vicious merry-go-round of drugs, alcohol, and men.”

She refilled her glass and went on, “I love milk. We didn’t always have it in the house those last couple of years, but Mama had her pills. When the doctor quit giving them to her, then she got them from the street. Every Saturday night she’d go out. Before she left, she’d get all dressed up and take two or three pills. That woman tonight reminded me of all that. I hated to see her like that. She’d always been . . .”

Just thinking that he’d been looking forward to hitting the bar the next night filled Tucker with his own share of guilt. He shouldn’t put her through all that again—not even if they were just partners. She was a good woman, and she damn sure deserved better.

“How long was it until you lost her?”

“Four years after Daddy died. But truth is I lost her when the doctor gave her that first bottle of pills to help her get through the funeral. She’d always liked her liquor and usually started on cocktails long before five o’clock. Mix those with enough pain pills and—” Jolene’s shoulder rose. “I thought when I got a job as a waitress after school every day that things would be better.”

Something pinched his heart and tightened his chest. On Saturday nights when he often drank too much, he was looking for a way to make things better, to forget. And yet he hung on to every memory that he and Melanie had shared.

She went on, “The only thing that changed when I went to work was that Mama said she’d pay the bills with her paycheck, and I was responsible for bringing home the food.”

Jolene should have been enjoying her senior year of school, Tucker thought. Pep rallies. Time with her friends and a boyfriend who’d be her first love. Not working for grocery money. Jolene deserved a good life just to pay for what all she’d been through.

“Did you hold up your end of the deal?” He wanted to move closer to her, wrap her up in his arms and hug her, but he couldn’t make himself do that. It led to other things, and he’d vowed to love Melanie to death—that meant his as well as hers.

She picked up the dirty bowls and carried them to the dishwasher. “Didn’t have much choice. Pretty soon I was doing double shifts on Friday and Saturday nights and paying the utility bills, too. Her paycheck was going for pills, booze, and lottery tickets.”

“Why’d you stay?” Tucker asked.

“She was my mama, and I had a roof over my head even if I didn’t have friends or any time to call my own. I got homework done in the kitchen at the café between customers. I don’t know why it’s all coming back so strong now. But I hated for her to go out, because it meant there’d probably be a strange man in the house the next morning. And he’d be eating up the groceries I’d brought in for us.” Jolene rubbed her temples with her fingertips. “I’m sorry, Tucker. You didn’t need to hear all that in the middle of the night.”

“What’s said in the Magnolia Inn stays in the Magnolia Inn, just like what they say about Vegas.” He laid a hand on her arm and wished he could do more to take away some of the pain.

“Thank you. You’d never guess who showed up at the bar and stayed until midnight.” She dropped her hands to her lap.

He removed his hand and took a guess. “Lucy with her new boyfriend, and they ordered some weird drink that you had to look up in the book to even know how to make?”

She refilled her milk glass. “Nope, Flossie, but she was there hoping that Lucy would show up. And you’ll never guess why.” She didn’t give him time to answer. “Because if Lucy arrived at the bar, that would mean she was through with her religious phase.”

“And then they wouldn’t have to go to church with her, right?” Tucker asked.

“Exactly.” Jolene yawned. “And now I’m going to bed. I can’t get to sleep if I stay up until dawn. See you about noon, and we’ll get in a few hours of work before I go back to the bar.”

“Oh, no.” Tucker shook his head. “I quit at noon on Saturday. Five and a half days a week is my limit. So sleep as long as you want. I plan on drawing up plans for the other bedrooms, and then Monday morning we’ll get back after it.”

“Whatever you say, partner.” She started for the door but turned before she got there. “Thanks for listening. The song is out of my head now.”

“You’re welcome,” he said. “I charge more for therapy. You’ll get the bill next week.”