The Girl He Used to Know(29)

“Really? That’s cool. I’ve never met anyone who loved books so much they wanted to be surrounded by them. I want to move to New York and work in the financial district. I want to make a lot of money and not have to worry about paying for things.” He looked around the room. “I don’t ever want to live in a crappy old drafty apartment.”

“Does your family not have a lot of money?” I asked.

“It’s just my mom and me. My dad died when I was six, and I’m pretty sure we’ve been struggling ever since. There wasn’t any life insurance or anything like that. Someday I’ll earn enough money to take care of myself and my mom.”

“Are you putting yourself through school?” I was lucky, because my parents had saved enough for my brother and me to go to college. We’d be on our own for our graduate studies, but we’d been given a wonderful head start on our educations.

“I had a pretty sizable academic scholarship to Northwestern. Grants and loans covered the rest. It was the only way I was going to get the education and the life I wanted.”

I remembered that Jonathan had told me he’d transferred to Illinois, and he’d thanked me for not asking about it. But why? Maybe I was supposed to? Maybe it was yet another social cue I’d missed and it had been rude of me not to show interest in the subject. Why were there so many things to think about? To remember? Why couldn’t I figure anything out in the moment instead of days or weeks later?

“Did you not like it at Northwestern?”

“I did like it. I felt like I belonged there. I didn’t set out to … I was trying really hard to keep myself afloat, and I promised myself I’d only do it once or twice. But writing the papers was such easy money and I was acquiring so much student-loan debt. I had to grovel, for days, but the university’s ethics committee finally agreed not to make it part of my permanent transcript if I just left.”

“You wrote papers for other people? That’s cheating.”

“Yeah, well. It’s not like I asked people to write them for me. I was the one who did the work.”

“But cheating is wrong,” I said.

Jonathan looked away. “You’re right. It is. And this shitty, drafty apartment is probably more than I deserve. I’m just trying to put the whole thing behind me.”

Jonathan didn’t talk as much after that, and around ten o’clock I started yawning.

“Are you not having a good time?” he asked.

“I’m having a wonderful time, but I’m very tired.”

“Do you want me to take you home?”

“Okay.”



* * *



Jonathan turned off his truck and walked me to the entrance of my building. I had to really concentrate in order to remember everything Janice had told me. “Thank you I had such a great time and I really like being around you and dinner was so good.” It came out all at once, and when I finally reached the end of that long, rambling statement, I had to gasp for air.

“I had a great time, too.”

“For real?”

He grabbed my hand and held it gently in his large palm. “Yes.”

“Are you going to kiss me?”

He laughed. “I was planning on it, yes.”

“Okay. I’m ready.”

He laughed again, but it wasn’t the mean kind of laugh; at least, I didn’t think it was. He cupped my jaw in his hands and pressed his lips to mine. He closed his eyes, which was good, because I could leave mine open so I wouldn’t miss anything. I felt the same warmth I’d felt when Jake first kissed me, but it was so much better with Jonathan. He opened his eyes and I looked away as fast as I could.

“Have you ever been kissed?” he asked.

“Only by Jake but that doesn’t count because he only did it to trick me. Did I not do it right?”

“You did it right,” he said.

I wanted to believe him. “Do it again.”

So he did.



* * *



Janice was waiting up for me. I had barely walked in the door and hadn’t even taken off my coat when the questions started. “How was your date? Do you like him? Where did you go? I want to hear all about it.”

“Most of the date was good. I liked the meatball sandwiches, but I still hate bars. We went to Kam’s and Jake was there. When I saw him, I freaked out. I almost got hit by a car because I ran right into the street. I just wanted to get away from him. Jonathan ran after me and we went back to his place. It was nice. Quiet. I told him about what had happened with Jake and he was nice about it. I felt comfortable with him. Like I could tell him things that I’ve only been able to tell you. I drank part of my beer but couldn’t finish it. When he walked me to the door I told him I had a great time and liked being around him and then he kissed me. It was so great!”

Janice made this noise like a loud sigh. “There’s nothing quite like a first kiss. What else did you do?”

“We mostly talked. He wants to move to New York someday and make lots of money. I found out he had to transfer here because he let people cheat off him at Northwestern because he was broke.”

Janice put her hand on my arm. “Annika. What did you say to Jonathan after he told you about the cheating?”

“I told him cheating was wrong because it is. It’s horrible.”