The Bride Goes Rogue (The Fifth Avenue Rebels #3)(79)
“So, how did you get over it?”
“Well, with your father I haven’t and probably never will. With everyone else, I don’t know. It just . . . went away after a time. I got busy and had my own successes, my own properties to focus on. I stopped worrying about what others were doing and concentrated on myself.”
She nodded. “That’s what I was attempting to do after the betrothal contract dissolved. I thought I’d have a string of affairs up and down the island, build my museum and never think about marriage or husbands ever again.”
Though the plan made him smile, he couldn’t see her succeeding with it. “Kat, you aren’t Nellie. Nor are you Alice or Maddie, who both rushed into marriage. You’re you, and that’s enough. You have a big heart and an easy, natural charm, with an infectious personality that’s impossible to refuse. So, do what makes you happy, not what you think you should be doing.”
Seconds stretched as they stared at one another, with rain continuing to pelt against the windows. It was intimate, like they were isolated from the rest of the world. A glen in the middle of nowhere. He loved the city, with its towering steel and rough cobblestones, but he wouldn’t care to be anywhere else at the moment except for in his lodge with this particular woman.
She licked her lips and the sight of her small pink tongue sent a wave of heat through him. Christ, this girl. Even the simplest things she did were damn arousing.
When she began walking around the workbench, the bottom of his stomach hollowed out as hope ballooned in his chest. She stopped just out of reach and looked up at him, and a familiar sparkle in her gaze sent his blood rushing south. Her voice was soft. “Want to hear what I would like right now?”
The possibilities nearly made him light-headed. “With every single bone in my body.”
“I want you . . . to teach me how to cook those fish.”
Air rushed out of his lungs and he shook his head, trying to clear it. “Go and wash your hands, reinette. You can help me make dinner.”
They ate the fish and drank champagne, all the while chatting companionably. It was nice. They hadn’t shared a meal before, and Katherine was surprised by how charming and funny Preston was outside of the bedroom. Nearly all of their interactions the past month had been about kissing, rather than actually talking, and she liked this side of him.
You’re you, and that’s enough.
When she remembered the words, along with everything else he’d said, she felt warm and bubbly inside. Was that truly how he saw her?
It was all so confusing. Three hours ago she was prepared never to forgive or see him again. But then he caught and cooked her fish from the lake and said wonderful things about her, and she felt her resolve weakening. Was she so shallow, then?
It had been fun teasing him earlier. Probably cruel to make him think she was going to demand something naughty, but he deserved a little torture after everything he’d done.
Though honestly, her desire hadn’t been a lie. Arousal had thrummed in her blood ever since she emerged from the bath and found him in the kitchen. Preston Clarke, domesticated. Who would’ve ever believed it? And how utterly fascinating.
“Are you finished?” he asked, gesturing to her plate.
“Yes, thank you.”
He carried both their plates to the sink. “I’ll clean those later. Would you like coffee?”
“Can you make coffee?”
“Of course. I don’t keep day-to-day staff at the lodge. They come once a week to look after the place. So when I’m here, I generally fend for myself.”
Strange, but it hadn’t occurred to her before now that they were totally alone. She didn’t mind, though. And, considering what she was wearing, it was preferable.
The rain hadn’t let up and the sky was even darker. In another hour, it would be nighttime. Should she attempt to find her lodge? Not sure that was wise with two glasses of champagne in her stomach.
And what about the bears?
She peeked at Preston through her lashes. Of course, there were dangers here, as well. But this was a danger she well knew.
His mouth hitched as he leaned on the marble toward her. “You’re wearing an odd expression. Care to share?”
She gave him a half-truth. “I was noticing the hour and wondering if it’s safe to return.”
“It’s still pouring, but if you want to go I’ll find slickers and galoshes for us. I’ll see that you get back to your lodge safely.”
“You would do that for me?”
His expression softened, and the warmth she saw in his dark gaze curled her toes. “Haven’t you realized by now the lengths I’ll go to for you?”
Because he wanted to sleep with her again. It was the only reason he needed her forgiveness, so everything could go back to the way it was before.
Too much had changed, however.
Nothing would ever go back to how it was before, not now. He’d proven how little she meant to him. He would never love her, never care more about her than his company and buildings, and that hurt. She’d wanted to be more than a fleeting affair to him. She wanted to be his everything.
Silly, stupid Katherine.
She’d set out on an adventure, desperate for excitement, and ended up scorched instead. Somewhere along the way, between the games and the attention, she forgot her worth. She’d lost herself. But she wouldn’t let him hurt her again. It was time to reclaim her dignity and self-respect.