The Billionaire's Matchmaker(70)

The ‘library’ she discovered was not unlike Nick’s office, only instead of a desk, an oversized sofa dominated the room. He motioned for her to take a seat before walking over to a small bar set up in the corner. “Water or stronger?” he asked.

“Whatever you’re having is fine.”

He grabbed two water bottles. “So,” he said, handing one to her, “you’re worried about your reputation.”

“Not really. Sort of. It’s complicated.” She set her water down, bottle unopened. Where did she begin? “Last night, in the woods, you made me feel things I hadn’t felt in a long time. Things I didn’t want to feel.”

“Go on.”

“When I came to Chandler’s Cove, it was to be a certain kind of person. I wanted to be in control of my life again. Things had gotten chaotic in Chicago.”

“What do you mean, chaotic?”

“I mean I was out of control.” She looked to her lap so he couldn’t see her shame. “My father took off when I was in first grade. One day he just disappeared. My mom use to tell me it was my fault.”

“I’m—”

She held up a hand to cut him off. “You didn’t want sympathy, and neither do I. What happened, happened. Anyway,” she took a deep breath, “long story short, I developed ‘issues’. I took affection from wherever I could get it. Whoever. I wasn’t always discriminating in my choices.”

She heard stirring and the sofa sagged next to her. Nick had moved closer. Exactly what she didn’t want, because even when she was filled with shame, his proximity stirred her awareness. Skin burning, she turned her face away. “By the time I graduated college, I’d lost track of how many nights, how many false promises. All I wanted was someone to hold me and make me feel like I was wanted. So long as I didn’t spend the night alone.”

“Jenny…” Tenderness had crept into his voice. Her stomach ached at the sound. Kindness had been her biggest downfall. A few kind words, and she was done.

“I had a health scare.” She blurted the words out fast as she could.

“A scare?”

Jenny nodded. No need explaining. He was smart enough to figure it out. “Fortunately, it was only a scare but it was enough to make me realize how messed up my life had gotten. I promised myself then and there I would change. That I would stop being some needy, desperate creature who let men use her.

“So I moved here and I reinvented myself. It was hard but I created a new kind of life. For the first time in my life, I had real friends. Supportive, female friends.” Gabby, Marney, and Mia didn’t know it, but they’d been her lifeline. She grew stronger because they were in her life.

“Do they know about…about your life before?”


Now who thought who was a monster? Jenny shook her head. “No. I buried the old me when I left, never to be resurrected again.”

“Then why—”

“Because I owed you an explanation for last night. I couldn’t let you think my fear was your fault.” Why she gave him such a lengthy explanation, however, she didn’t know, any more than she understood why she had to rush here to confess. Who knows, maybe it was his scars that made her feel like she should share her own in such detail.

Or maybe this was another example of how easily he could affect her behavior.

Having heard her out, Nick rose and walked to the fireplace. He stood with his back to her, staring at the unlit hearth. Jenny prepared to leave.

“So when we kissed last night, it reminded you of Chicago?”

“Yes.” There was no reason to say more. He’d been in the woods with her, saw how she reacted. “I swore I would never go down that road again.”

“What road?”

Did he really expect her to explain?

Of course. Lost in her shame, she’d forgotten the purpose of her confession was to soothe his demons. He was looking for reassurance that her fear wasn’t because of him. Taking a deep breath, she plunged forward. “I promised myself I would never get so caught up in physical pleasure that I forgot reality.” She convinced herself lust equaled love one too many times. Another reason last night scared her so damn badly. The arousal that kissing Nick awoke inside her was stronger than anything she’d ever felt before.

Nick turned and though he was trying to hide it, she caught the spark of pride in his eye. Had it been someone else, she’d been furious, but knowing his own fear of rejection, she couldn’t fault him his small satisfaction. To his credit, he blinked the reaction away as quickly as possible.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“I already told you, I’m not looking for your sympathy.”

“Then why did you tell me?”

“So you’d understand.”

His mouth formed a thin line. “In other words, out of sympathy for me.” He stared at the floor for a second before crossing the room and perching himself on the coffee table. A long, thick-legged piece that looked created for that exact purpose. The new position placed them knee-to-knee. His pants leg brushed against her khaki skirt, the contact somehow reaching through the material to touch her skin.

“You didn’t have to say anything, you know,” he said. “You could have gone your separate way and never said a word. Let me believe whatever I was going to believe. I wouldn’t have known.”