The Billionaire's Christmas Baby(12)

He scowled at her. “Did she tell you that after I spent years protecting her she bailed on me? That I searched for her and tried to help her? That she and her addict friends broke into my house and trashed it, stealing everything of value I had? That I almost lost everything when I started out because I trusted her?”

Oh, Louise had told her all right. When Louise had been sober she’d confided so many things to Hannah. And whenever she spoke of her older brother her voice had been filled with such pain. She had stopped seeking him out after that night of the break-in. She’d told her of their childhood—before and after their mother had died.

Hannah stared at the handsome, strong lines of Jackson’s face and tried to picture the fun-loving, energetic boy that Louise had described. She tried to see the teen who had always stepped in to defend his sister against their father. The one who took beatings to spare his younger sister. And she could see it, she could see the boy that had become stronger, taller, and had finally been able to overpower their father. She could see all of that—Jackson was strong and loyal. If he felt that need to protect his sister at one time, surely he would do it for her innocent baby.

Hannah placed her empty glass on the side table. “Your sister had a lot of regrets. How your relationship ended up was her biggest. She was humiliated. Louise said as soon as she got her life together, she was going to try and reconnect with you. She was devastated by how she treated you. You were her protector.” Her voice trailed off as she watched his jaw clench and unclench. She could tell he struggled with his control. Jackson finally broke the silence, his voice harshly tearing through the calm.

“It’s a little late for regrets, isn’t it?”

“You can’t change the past. Your sister is gone, but you have a niece who needs you. Emily hasn’t done anything wrong. It’s not her fault that her mother killed herself.”

Hannah watched his lip curl into a smile that tried to appear mocking, but the pain was etched on his face so strongly that Hannah could almost feel it herself.

“No, and it sure as hell isn’t my fault either. She’ll be better off with someone who wants a child.”

Hannah squeezed her sweaty palms in her lap. “It doesn’t work that way. No one magically gets placed with the world’s best parents. She needs you. You are her uncle. She needs someone tied to her past. She needs someone her mom trusted. What better person is there?”

Jackson tilted his head back and she studied the strong line of his jaw and neck. He squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t want her baby.”

“Stop thinking of yourself.”

He jerked his head around to meet her eyes. She could read the surprise in his eyes—and the anger.

Hannah concentrated on the sounds of the crackling fireplace and Charlie’s soft snore. The tension in Jackson’s frame was contagious. The air felt hot and prickly.

“You think a bachelor who has never even held a baby is a good choice for a father—the man that abandoned his family and changed his name to forget them? I turned my back on my sister. I refused to see her, I refused to talk to her.” He finished off the rest of his whiskey with a sharp swallow. Hannah felt the pain of his regret, even if he wouldn’t admit to it. It was embodied in every tightly wound muscle in his body, in the lines in his face. He regretted what had happened with Louise and that gave Hannah hope that there was still a chance. She wanted to tell him everything—about her past, about the other reason she wanted him to adopt Emily. But she couldn’t talk about that and stay detached. She was already in way over her head.

“You are her uncle.”

“Stop saying that.”

Hannah looked into his eyes and then nodded. “Louise made mistakes, Jackson. Her baby shouldn’t have to suffer for them.”

“Why the hell do you care so much anyway?”

She clenched her hands to keep from shaking. “I don’t want her to enter the system,” Hannah whispered, almost choking on the words. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, trying to block the image of handing over that baby to some foster family, not knowing what would happen to her. She had broken a cardinal rule—she had gotten too close to Louise and Emily. She wouldn’t be able to keep Emily safe once she left Mrs. Ford’s. She wouldn’t have unlimited access to her like she did now. She held her breath as she waited for him to say something. It was obvious he didn’t want to hear what she said. “You’ll regret it,” she said softly, forcing herself to walk over to him on legs that felt like jelly. She watched his jaw clench at her words. She felt the heat of the fire on her face, the flames attacking the pile of logs, the strength of the fire burning any hope she had of Jackson agreeing to this.


But she had to tell him. “This decision will haunt you. It won’t erase your past and it definitely won’t take away your pain. Emily will be gone, but that anger, that resentment you feel toward your sister won’t go away. It’ll eat away at you until you’re not the same person anymore. You’ll be going about your life and then you’ll stop every now and then and wonder what happened to that little baby. You’ll wonder if someone is looking out for her the way you did for Louise. You’ll wonder if the system failed her the way it failed you.”

“Enough!” He growled into the fire, sounding more like a wounded animal than a man. Hannah didn’t move, didn’t breathe. He finally turned to look at her, his brown eyes dark and void.