The Accidental Countess (Accidental #2)(7)
She hurried over to the looking glass that hung on the wall of her bedchamber and took a good look at her reflection. Her eyes were too big for her small, pale face. Her hair was lanky and a nondescript color. Her lips too wide, her nose too small. And those freckles weren’t helping anything at all. She was a fright, a sixteen-year-old fright. Perhaps she would be beautiful one day, but today was not that day. Today she was too thin and too scrawny and too everything. Too nervous, also. Mustn’t forget too nervous. The only good thing was her gown. It was ice blue. It brought out the bit of color in her eyes and didn’t make her skin look too, too pale. Her mother had had the gown made specifically for her birthday celebration and Cass looked good in it. Well, as good as she was going to look with the rest of the fright to go along with it.
“Must I speak with him, Mother?” Penelope replied in what could only be described as a petulant tone.
Cass swung around to stare at her cousin. All she could do was blink. “You do not wish to see Lieutenant Swift?” It made no sense to her. How could her cousin not want to see her intended?
“He’s not even a lieutenant,” Pen shot back. “He’s a second lieutenant, just received his commission.”
Cass didn’t see how that mattered. “But he’s … he’s … your intended.” Not to mention he was handsome, kind, strong, sincere, and absolutely wonderful. All of the times Cass had been in his company, she’d been positively mesmerized by him. Pen was a lucky, lucky young woman.
“He is not,” Pen retorted, crossing over the thick carpet and staring at herself in the same looking glass that Cass had recently abandoned. “He’s not my intended yet. Nothing is settled definitely.”
Pen’s mother plunked her hands on her hips. “I don’t care if he’s a cadet. He’s going to be your husband one day and he’s made the trip all the way out here to say good-bye to you before he leaves. You’ll do him the courtesy of speaking with him.”
Pen rolled her eyes and stuffed a fat brown curl behind her ear. “If you insist, Mother.”
“I most certainly do. Now, I’ll go and greet him. You come down to the rose salon in ten minutes, miss.”
Pen’s mother strode from the room, giving her daughter a stern stare.
“I wish she wasn’t so set on my match with Julian Swift,” Penelope said, after her mother had vacated the room. “For all I know he’ll be gone for five entire years. Five years! Can you imagine?”
Cass shook her head. In part because she truly couldn’t imagine Julian being gone for such a long time and in part because the thought brought tears to her eyes and she was already desperately fighting them. “No,” she murmured. “I cannot.”
“He might not even return at all,” Pen pointed out.
Cass could only nod, but her cousin’s words stung her heart.
“I may never see him again,” Pen added.
Cass walked silently back over to the looking glass and took her cousin’s hand. “Is that why you don’t want to speak to him, Pen? You’re afraid of getting close. In the event that he … d-dies.” She closed her eyes on that last word. Unthinkable. Unimaginable.
“Not really,” Pen replied, tugging her hand from Cass’s grasp. “I just cannot bear to think of myself growing old and ugly waiting for a man who might not be coming back. It’s completely unfair, don’t you think?”
Surely Pen didn’t know how harsh her words sounded. Surely she didn’t mean them the way they came across.
“I’m sorry, Pen,” Cass said simply. “It must be quite difficult for you.”
“You’ve no idea,” Pen replied. “And I’m sorry, too. Sorry that Mother and Father chose a second son with a target on his back to be my groom. I know I’m not the best catch of the Season, but surely they could find me someone who isn’t about to go cavorting all over Europe. They only want this match so that they can be connected to the Swifdon title.”
Cass couldn’t disagree with her cousin. It was true that the Swifdons were an illustrious family. But how could Pen not want Julian? Tall, handsome, kind Julian? Why, Cass had been in love with him since the day she’d first seen him.
“What are you going to do, Pen?” Cass smoothed her hands down her skirts.
“What can I do?” Pen asked with a sigh. “I’m going to have to go speak with him. Say good-bye.” Just then, Pen’s eyes lit with fire. “Do me a favor, Cass. Come and save me in five minutes.”
Cass blinked rapidly. “Save you?”
“Yes. Come down to the rose salon and interrupt. Tell me you’re about to begin the celebration or something. Anything. I cannot bear to stay there and endure an awkward discussion with Lieutenant Swift for Lord knows how long.”
Cass shook her head. She couldn’t imagine not wanting to savor what might well be her last moments on earth with Julian. “Oh, no, I cannot—”
“Of course you can. Do it, please. For me?” Pen squeezed Cass’s shoulder and flew from the room saying, “Thank you, Cass, you’re such a dear,” on her way out as if Cass had agreed.
Shaking, Cass turned slowly and took another look in the mirror. She’d gone white as a ghost, whiter, even, than she had been before if such a thing were possible. Perhaps she’d turn translucent next. Translucent with freckles, what a lovely combination. She sighed. What was she to do? Pen was expecting her to barge in on her last private moments with her future husband and interrupt them. Cass paced in front of the mirror, pondering it all for a moment. There was one good thing to consider.