The Accidental Countess (Accidental #2)(55)

“She did but it doesn’t matter. She obviously didn’t know I’d already met you. Though why she would think I hadn’t when I’ve been at a house party with you all week … I must admit I briefly believed she’d taken complete leave of her senses.”

Miss Bunbury closed her eyes and nodded.

“I would like very much to kiss you now,” Julian said.

A small gasp escaped her lips. “Me?”

“Patience,” he breathed. Julian stared at her beautiful face. He did want to kiss her. Cassandra wasn’t here, after all, and Cassandra was in love with another man. Patience was here and lovely and wanted him. He could tell by the way she looked at him, the way she touched him, the way she tipped back her head and closed her eyes, waiting for his kiss.

Julian lowered his mouth to hers. The feel of her sweet, soft lips under his made him gasp into her mouth. It was better than he’d expected. Much better.

He pulled her close, her bodice pressed against his chest. He pushed his tongue into her mouth, lust flooding through his veins, making his cock hard.

Patience kissed him back with a fervor and energy that enveloped him. She made little moaning noises in the back of her throat and she rocked against him.

His mouth slanted over hers, hot, hard, demanding. He couldn’t get enough, didn’t want to stop. She was gorgeous.

Only she wasn’t … Cassandra.

Reality slammed into his gut. He pulled his mouth away and pressed his forehead to hers, breathing heavily. No. No. Stop thinking about Cassie. This isn’t the time. She loves another man.

He clenched his jaw. What the hell was he doing, thinking about Cassie at a moment like this? He pulled Patience against him and kissed her again. Would Cass smell like this? Look like this? Be this irresistible?

He pulled his mouth away from Patience’s once more, holding her by the shoulders. Damn it to hell, he couldn’t get Cassie out of his mind. He shook his head as if that might serve to dislodge her. It didn’t.

Miss Bunbury stared up at him with wide blue eyes … eyes that looked very much like his memory of Cassandra’s eyes. He shook himself again. Now he was truly going mad, wanting Cassie so much that he was seeing her in a completely different woman. It wasn’t just wrong. It was sick, and completely unfair to Patience.

She blinked up at him, looking entirely confused. Damn it. That was his fault. He hated himself for what he was about to say.

“I’m sorry, Miss Bunbury…” And then, “Patience. I thought I could do this but I cannot.”

Tears filled her eyes. “I understand, Captain,” she murmured.

Julian felt like a complete arse. He was a complete arse. What sort of man kissed a nice young lady like Patience Bunbury and then stopped? She didn’t deserve this. She’d already been jilted by her intended last summer. Now she had to endure Julian’s ungentlemanly behavior, as well. He wouldn’t blame her if she hated him forever.

“God, Patience … Miss Bunbury. I’m a complete scoundrel. I truly didn’t intend to lead you on or to hurt you. Do you have a brother? A father? I’m certain one of them will want to call me out.”

Her voice was small. “Please, Captain Swift, no more apologies. You’ve nothing to apologize to me for. Please, just go.”

Julian bowed his head, then nodded.

He glanced up at her again and rubbed his thumb against her high cheekbone, wiping away one delicate tear. “Damn me to hell. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

And that was true, but it didn’t matter.

He stood and made his way to the door, then he turned back to Miss Bunbury. “I’m sorry.”





CHAPTER THIRTY


Cass took her time dressing the next morning. She sent back every gown her maid presented to her. The gowns didn’t matter, any one of them would have been fine. The truth was that she didn’t want to face Julian. And each thing she accomplished to get ready to go downstairs and see him would bring her that much closer to her moment of reckoning. A moment she dreaded.

It was time. Finally time to face the truth and take the consequences. She knew that. It was over.

First, however, she had to find Garrett. He’d had something to tell her last night. She’d been rude to him, rushing off like that. If she’d known what was going to happen, she wouldn’t have rushed. Would have lingered, actually. Oh, it had been a disaster. She’d tried to find Garrett after the debacle in the library but he was nowhere to be found and neither was Lucy. Instead, she’d gone up to bed and thought about how detestable she was. How much Julian was going to despise her once she told him the truth. Eventually, she’d fallen into an exhausted slumber, one that left her fitful and dreaming about Julian berating her for lying to him and marrying another woman. Her worst nightmare. It was all about to come true and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She could only delay the inevitable.

She stared at her pale reflection in the looking glass. Julian had told her she was the most beautiful woman in the world last night. Hadn’t that once been her dream? But he hadn’t said those words to her. No, Patience Bunbury was the most beautiful woman in the world, Patience Bunbury, the woman who didn’t exist. The reflection disgusted her. How could such a simple pretty face mask such ugliness and lies? She scrubbed her hands savagely across her face as if she could wipe away her looks, replace them with the mask of ugliness she knew she deserved after what she’d done. Julian was honorable and noble right up to the end. He’d been the one to stop, not her. Oh, no. She might have gone on kissing him all night, the lying little hoyden that she was.