Tatiana and Alexander: A Novel(65)

He had expected to fight, he expected to freeze, to fire his weapons and to suffer, to swim, to sleep knee deep in mud, to die if he had to, to kill men who stood in his way. He did not expect this--a wounded son and a waiting father.

Alexander took another breath. It was not Barrington anymore. All he smelled was the organic, slightly stale old blood, the metal of the weapons, the burnt sulfur odor of gunpowder. And all he heard was Yuri Stepanov's lungs laboring through each breath.

Alexander would be leaving a young man to die. He would be leaving a father's son to die. He would be buying his freedom with this boy's death. Alexander crossed himself. This is God's test, he thought. To show me what I'm made of.

Alexander grabbed Stepanov by his arms and legs and lifted him off the ground. "Dima, I have to bring him back."

Dimitri paled. "What?"

"You heard me."

"Are you out of your f*cking mind? You can't go back. We are not going back."

"I am."

A silent scream came from Dimitri in the quiet woods. Drip, drip, trickle, crackle, birds gone, crickets gone, drip, crackle and Dimitri's mute fury. "What are you talking about?" he hissed. "We didn't come back for him. He was a ruse. We came here to continue forward."

"I know we did," said Alexander. "But I can't."

"This is war, Alexander! What? You're suddenly going to care about each of the thousands of men you let die under your command?" Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

"I didn't let them die," Alexander said.

"We're going forward." Dimitri grit his teeth.

"Fine," said Alexander. "If you're going, then let me give you half of my money. You will get yourself to Stockholm one way or another, and from there you will know what to do. You will get yourself to America."

"What are you talking about? What do you mean,me? You mean us."

"No, Dimitri, I told you. I'm going back with Yuri. But no reason for you to go back."

"I'm not going without you!" Dimitri nearly shrieked through the woods, his voice pitched high.

"All right," said Alexander. "Let's go back while he is still alive."

Dimitri didn't move. "If you tell me you're returning to Lisiy Nos, then bringing Stepanov back will be the last thing you will do as a Soviet soldier."

With Stepanov flung over his shoulders, Alexander came up very close to Dimitri and said, through his own grit teeth, "Dimitri, are you threatening me?"

"Yes," Dimitri said.

Alexander backed away a step and looked at Dimitri with grim resignation. "Well, I'll tell you what," he said slowly, "you go ahead and do what you like. Go ahead and inform on me. Then it's even more important that the last thing I do is save another man's life."

"Oh, f*cking hell!"

"We're going to have another chance! Look at what we found in these woods. We'll be able to come back here again. This is our first chance, not our last. We'll come back here and we'll escape. If you're threatening me with the NKVD, then you will never yourself get out of the Soviet Union. You'll rot here. I'll be dead, but you'll be here for the rest of your life." Alexander paused. "Mark my words, Europe is going to war with Hitler. We'll have another chance, but not if I'm dead. So what will it be? If you want to run, you'll keep your mouth shut long enough for me to get us out." Alexander paused. "Don't be an ass. Let's bring the boy back to his father."

"No!" said Dimitri.

"Then do what you f*cking like." Alexander was done speaking. Without waiting for Dimitri to catch up, he turned around and started walking. He heard Dimitri's sullen footsteps in the distance behind him. Dimitri was a coward, and as a coward perhaps he could shoot another man in the back, but not when the man had promised to someday carry him on it.

They returned to base after hours of slogging in the dismal swamp. It was nearly dark, but the first thing Alexander saw by the line of the pines was Mikhail Stepanov, standing with one of the NKVD border guards, looking for them through the trees. His legs shaking, Stepanov walked towards Alexander and was barely strong enough to ask, "Is he alive?"

"Yes," said Alexander. "But he needs a doctor." Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

Mikhail Stepanov took his son from Alexander and carried him to the field tent where he laid him on an empty cot and sat by him quietly, as they got a transfusion into Yuri, and some morphine too, and even some sulfa drugs. Together Stepanov and Alexander washed Yuri's body, and the doctor stitched up the three bullet wounds. Yuri had been too long in the woods with metal in his body. The wounds were infected.

Alexander went to get something to eat and to have a smoke, and then came back and sat by Stepanov's side. Yuri had come to a bit, and was faintly talking to his father. "Papochka," he said, "I'm going to be all right?"

"Yes, son," said Stepanov, holding Yuri's hand.

"I was lucky. It could have been so much worse." Yuri glanced at Alexander. "Right, Lieutenant?"

"Right, Private," said Alexander.

"Mama will be proud of me," said Yuri. "Am I going to fight again?"