Sweet Soul (Sweet Home #5)(67)
My whole being trembled with fear, with the fear that Lexi knew my past. A hand pressed on my back causing me to jump. Still I didn’t turn round. I couldn’t. I was paralyzed with fear.
“I haven’t told Levi. It’s not my place to say a thing to anyone.” Lexi took a deep breath and continued. “I have an idea what you have been through, Elsie. As in, I can piece together what might have happened to you in your past. I’ve seen the reports from when you were taken into care, and why. That’s your pain and this is your journey to find peace.” She moved her hand. “But you have a boy in that pool house who I believe is already head over heels in love with you, even if he hasn’t said so himself. And if I’m not mistaken, I think that you love him back.” I closed my eyes and fought back the rush of emotion welling to the surface.
Lexi sighed. “He’d understand, Elsie. Believe me. I don’t know what you know of Levi’s past, of any of ours, but he would understand. Talk to him, use that beautiful voice you keep hidden to confide in him. Believe me when I say, from personal experience, the moment you let your demons free, they don’t haunt you quite so much. And love does help; it ain’t a cure, but it’s the beginning of the path to healing.”
Lexi went quiet, and I forced myself to turn to face her. She was smiling at me and I could see the kindness in her heart shining through her green eyes. “I can’t… I can’t face talking about it all, Lexi,” I whispered.
Her head tipped to the side in understanding. “I know, sweetie. But with trust and time, hopefully we can help you through. Hopefully one day you’ll be able to see the rainbow after the storm.”
Leaning over the seat, Lexi pressed a kiss to my head. Movement from the front door caught my eye, and I saw Austin walk out wearing a t-shirt and jeans, with his sleeping son in his arms. I watched Lexi’s expression melt when she saw her husband standing there, waiting to welcome her home.
“We healed each other,” Lexi said, without removing her attention from her husband. “We were both lost and knocked down, but we held on tight, and raised each other from the ashes. He brought me my rainbow, Elsie,” she huffed a loving laugh and said, “he brought me the stars.”
I didn’t know what that reference meant, but I could feel the magnitude of what he meant to her. Lexi slipped out of the car and I did too. I walked to the back gate, staying out of sight. I glanced back, seeing Austin, with his gang tattoos and intimidating stature, taking Lexi in his arms and pressing a soft kiss on her mouth.
He brought me the stars…
I walked in a daze down the garden path to the pool house, replaying in my mind the picture of Lexi too thin and sick, of Clara so frightened and small on the large chair, and me so closed in and fearful of the world to ever let anyone see my true self, to hear my voice. My different voice, but my voice that I was starting to understand should be heard nonetheless.
I pushed through the door to the pool house, seeing Levi sitting at his desk, studying hard. His fair hair was mussed and in disarray. And I knew that I was falling for him beyond what I ever thought possible… he brought me the moon.
Breaking his intense concentration, Levi lifted his head, that beautiful shy smile lighting up his handsome face. “Bella mia,” he rasped, my heart melting at the endearment.
Levi got up from his desk. He was dressed in a white sweater that clung to his muscles, and blue jeans that sat perfectly on his legs. In seconds he was with me, his thick arms pulling me to his chest. I wrapped my arms around his back and held on tight.
Levi pulled back and asked, “Are you okay?”
I nodded my head, so overcome by how I felt, at the memory of being joined with him on the bed. Standing on my tiptoes, I pressed a kiss to his soft lips. The kiss was as beautiful as him.
I broke from the kiss and said, “I’m going for a shower.”
Levi looked at me strangely, but he simply ran his thumb down my cheek and said, “Okay. I picked us up a pizza for dinner. We can eat it when you’re out. You can tell me about your day.”
Nodding, I headed to the bathroom, when I saw my mason jar was glowing stronger than last night. In the trash can beside the bed I saw a newly emptied glow stick. I smiled—he’d refilled the jar. He’d kept the light strong.
I showered as quickly as I could, the powerful hot jets immediately making me feel better. I washed my hair, the coconut shampoo carrying away the strains of the day.
I toweled off and wrapped myself in the robe that Levi had brought me. After combing my wet hair, I entered the main room and Levi was on the bed, a book in his hands. He smiled when he saw me come in. The pizza was already on the bed. I stared at him from the doorway, and hurried to his arms when he held them out for me to go to him.
I climbed on the bed and fell against his chest, his strong and warm arms keeping me safe. “You hungry?” he asked. I shook my head.
“Not yet.”
“Okay,” he replied, and ran his fingers through my hair. “Coconut,” he rasped. “I love that smell on you.”
I smiled against his chest, when he asked, “How was your day? How was the center?” I detected the apprehension in his voice, because I knew he wanted me to love it there. I knew it was because he thought it would make me want to stay. What he didn’t realize yet was that I didn’t need the center to stay—he was reason enough.