She Dims the Stars(15)

There’s a barely muffled, “Jesus,” from where Cline has his face buried in his hands.

My mom hardly bats an eyelash. “Turn it into an app, and I bet you’ll make a million bucks.”



Lying in my old bed feels familiar and odd at the same time. It’s been this way every time I’ve come home for the last three years. Sometimes I wonder if my mom would like the extra space for a treadmill or an office, but then I’d have to sleep on the couch, and it would feel like this wasn’t my home anymore, so I let her keep everything the way it is. Sometimes we need a little bit of constant in our ever-changing lives.

My bedroom door creaks open, and I turn over to see Audrey slip through the crack and close the door again as quietly as possible. “Sorry,” she whispers. “Did I wake you?”

I sit up and reach for the light, but she waves her hand to stop me. “I wasn’t asleep. You okay?”

She’s hovering at the edge of my bed in these little shorts and a tank top, her hair pulled up into that mess on her head again. “Don’t be weird, but can I get in with you? Is it against house rules to have a girl in your room?”

“Isn’t your whole ‘thing’ —your whole existence—about breaking the rules?” I ask and pull back the covers to invite her in.

She slips between the sheets and rests her cheek on my pillow, so I turn and mirror her position, looking at her face in the muted moonlight of my pre-teen bedroom. This girl is really pretty, but she’s full of so many secrets. Her eyes search mine for a moment before she inhales deeply.

“I’m working on that. I promise.”

“Okay.”

Her body heat quickly warms up the space between us, and the bed becomes toasty under the covers. I fold the comforter down a few inches, and she smiles up at me as she adjusts her hands under the pillow.

“How many girls have you let sleep in this bed with you?”

Eyes wide, I lean back and feign insult. “None. I would never.”

“Liar.”

“Fine,” I concede in a whisper. “I’ve had exactly ninety-nine, so I was really hoping you’d come in here tonight so I could round out my number.”

“You’re an idiot,” she manages out through her laughter. The bed shakes and creaks a little, so I press my hand on her hip to get her to stop shaking.

“Shh. The walls are thin, for real. I don’t want my mom to think we’re in here doing anything.”

“Of course not.” Audrey lies on her back and looks up at my ceiling for a few quiet moments. “I really like your mom. You take after her a lot. Mannerisms and stuff. She’s nice.”

“Thanks.”

“Why did you lie about the game?”

I close my eyes and try to think of the best way to say it, but it’s hard to explain without getting too detailed, so I decide to go with, “I don’t know how she’ll react to having a game made that’s so close to real life for us. If you know what I mean.”

“Sure. I get it. And I agree that the unicorn game would make a million dollars in the app store.”

Now it’s my turn to laugh, and she has to place her hand over my mouth to keep me quiet. She’s hovering over me, our noses almost touching as she quietly speaks. “Thank you for doing this. For taking me to Ruth’s. It means a lot to me.”

I pull her fingers off my mouth and nod, curling her fist into mine and laying it on my chest. “You’re doing me a favor, too.”

“Is it safe to say we’re friends, then? I have people I like or know, but I don’t usually say I have many I would consider to be friends. But I think you and I are, yeah?”

Puckering my lips, I pull my eyebrows together. “I don’t know, man. You stuck your tongue down my throat and everything.”

“As a friend!” She whisper yells and pinches my side, making me gasp and jerk, then giggle before I man up and stop that shit.

“Alright! You stuck your tongue down my throat as a friend. Fine. Now, are you sleeping in my bed as a friend? Is this a friend snuggle here?” I motion between us.

“Yes. Now roll over that way so I can big spoon you. It’s safer like this. Plus I can pretend I’m a jetpack while we sleep. Maybe you’ll dream about being in outer space.”

I do as she says, and she wraps her arms around my middle, but I pull her hands higher. “This is the safe zone,” I tell her as seriously as possible. “I cannot be held responsible for the things my body does in the night or in the morning if your hands wander outside of the safe zone. Friends or not.”

“Jesus take the wheel. This is going to be a long night,” she pretends to cry into my back.

Then she starts making jet pack noises, and that combined with the warmth of her embrace helps lull me to sleep much faster than I care to admit.





I had snuck back out of Elliot’s room about an hour before we were supposed to be up and just rested on the couch with my eyes open, wondering what the day was going to bring. Three states are all that separates me from something life changing. I can feel it in the pit of my stomach as the rest of the people in the house begin to stir. A quick breakfast, a heartfelt goodbye, and we are on the road into the morning sunrise.

Saying goodbye to his mom was difficult for some reason. Her hug was warm and inviting, and maybe it was the way she embraced me and held me like she meant it, but I didn’t want to let go until I had to.