Second Chance at Sunflower Ranch (The Ryan Family #1)(21)

“You are all welcome to give it a shot, but I don’t think it will do a bit of good,” Addy said. “I’m in shock that she said that about selling her sheep. She’s worked so hard at building up her flock, and she makes a lot of money selling show animals to the local kids. She keeps her flock over on the part that was my folks’ place. When she’s at school, Henry takes care of them, but the shearing is always saved for when she’s home. It’s a big job,” Addy answered. “And she’s always loved to do that part. You should have been around when she got her best ones ready to show at the county fair. She won the grand champion trophy almost every year.”

“Maybe she’s just yanking your chain,” Jesse said.

“She sounded pretty serious to me,” Addy sighed.

“How many sheep are we talking about?” Jesse asked.

“Thirty ewes, a ram, and maybe twenty lambs. I can’t believe she’s even thinking about selling. She’s been working on that project for five years,” Addy sighed.

“Why would she do that without talking to you or to Dad about it?” Jesse asked.

“I can’t even begin to understand why or what she’s thinking these days.” Addy put her head in her hands. “It’s got me totally baffled, but like you said, maybe she’s just messing with me.”

“Remember when we were that age?” he asked.

“Oh, yeah.” Addy removed her hands and held them in her lap. “We were ready to set the world on fire with our dreams.”

“I was going to save veterans in the war zones, and you were going to be a nurse. Maybe Mia is having trouble deciding where her place is in this world.”

“What happened to those two kids?” she whispered.

“You tell me,” Jesse answered. “I missed you so bad. I felt like I’d gotten a Dear John letter when you told me we shouldn’t even call or write anymore.”

“Why didn’t you try to change my mind?” she asked. “Like I told you in my last letter, you were off chasing your dream, and I…”

“You had a baby,” Jesse finished her sentence, “and didn’t even tell me. I was your best friend, and thought we were a little more than that after that last night. I didn’t even know about Mia until I came home after the second phase of my training. I figured you’d found someone else and didn’t want me in your life.” He still remembered feeling like he’d been gut-punched when he’d gotten the news.

“Mia was born on the last day of February. I was pretty busy with a newborn and trying to finish up my second semester of nurses’ training by the time you got done with your training,” she whispered.

Jesse nodded and kept driving, and then it hit him right between the eyes. His mouth went dry, and his hands trembled so badly that he had to focus on keeping the reins tight. His heart missed a beat, and his chest tightened. “Mia is my daughter, isn’t she? Why didn’t you tell me?” He couldn’t believe that it had taken him so damn long to figure it out.

Addy shrugged. “You never talked about anything but joining the Air Force and getting away from the ranch. I loved you too much to ruin that dream for you. If you had known I was pregnant, you would have done something stupid, like gone AWOL, and insisted on marrying me. I didn’t want to be married at eighteen, so I refused to tell anyone about you.”

“Is that why Mia’s been so hateful. Does she know?” Jesse asked.

“No, and I don’t want her to know until she gets through this rebellion.” Addy turned to look at him. “Promise me you won’t say a word. I’ll tell her when the time is right.”

“Does Grady know?” Jesse felt like he’d been kicked in the gut by a two-ton bull. He felt panicked—coming home to an ailing father, and now finding out he had a nineteen-year-old daughter who hated him. It was too much to take in. He slipped over into that fight-or-flight mode, with lots of emphasis on the flight right then.

Addy shook her head. “Promise me, please, that you won’t say or do anything to make her suspect. I have to be the one to tell her, and the time has to be right.”

“I promise, but Addy, I’m a father”—he winced at the word—“of a young woman I’ve never supported or acknowledged. How do I ever make that up to her or to you?”

Addy laid a hand on his knee. “Not one bit of this is your fault. I made the decision not to tell you or anyone else, so I’ll take the responsibility.”

“How did you…” he stammered, “hide it from…” He cleared his throat and tried to think, but everything was a blur.

“When I found out I was pregnant, I called Granny. She said she needed me to help her on her ranch and offered to pay for my college in exchange for some help. I simply moved from here to Cactus. My folks didn’t even know until they came home for Thanksgiving, and we let them think the baby belonged to one of the summer hired hands. It wasn’t all that difficult,” Addy answered.

“I wish you would have told me.” The first burst of anger replaced the shock, and he slapped the edge of the buckboard. “Even if we didn’t get married, I would have done right by her.”

“Water under the bridge,” she said. “We’ve both moved on.”