Second Chance Summer(56)

More stillness from her. Hell, he wasn’t even sure she was breathing. He stroked a hand up her back. “Lily—”

“I’m working on that,” she said softly. “I am. But you make me feel things I’m not ready for. I’ve been really good at keeping myself isolated so I wouldn’t engage my heart. So good that I’m not sure I can stop. I’m really talented at not feelings things anymore, Aidan.”

“I don’t buy it,” he said. “You’re warm and open and caring. You can’t be those things without feeling something. You give so much to everyone—”

She shook her head.

“You do. Jonathan,” he said. “Your clients …” He gently wrapped his hand up in her ponytail and tugged her head back to see her eyes. “Me.”

She snorted. “I don’t give to you. You give to me. Constantly rescuing me like one of your five-alarm calls.”

“I care about you.”

“You care about all your calls.”

“I care for you differently,” he said, narrowing his eyes, wanting to force her to believe this. “With a fire call, I don’t get a terrifying fear gripping me like I do whenever I hear that you’re on the trail heading up to Dead Man’s Cliff, or that you’ve fallen down a flight of stairs. You’re not a job to me, Lily. Not even close. You’re more. And I think I’m more to you too. You want to know what I think?”

“I’d say no, but I’m getting that it wouldn’t stop you from telling me anyway.”

He smiled grimly. “I think it’s not that you don’t feel anything, it’s that you feel too much. I scare you.”

“Your life scares me,” she said, and seemed shocked that she’d admitted such a thing.

His heart squeezed, hard. He’d never really given any thought at all to what the people who cared about him went through while he was working. The anxiety and worry. And for someone like Lily, who’d lost her sister so tragically, it would be worse, so much worse. “I get that,” he said quietly. “I do. And I can’t promise I’ll rein it in—it’s my job. But I can promise you that safety is of the upmost importance to me and everyone working with me. Always. But I don’t think that’s what this is. I think the real issue is that you’re afraid of loving someone and letting them love you.”

The look on her face said he’d hit bingo. But he could also tell that she wasn’t ready to go there, wasn’t ready to admit her feelings yet at all.

But at least he could show her his. Especially since he was more of a show-don’t-tell kind of guy anyway. “Come here,” he said.

“I’m right here.”

“Closer.”

She walked into his arms. He pulled her in and kissed her. He kissed her until he knew he’d taken it as far as he could without tearing off that pretty sundress right then and there, and only then did he lift his head.

“Oh,” she breathed, staggering back a step, clearly trying to play it cool—which might have worked if her eyes weren’t dilated and the pulse at the base of her throat wasn’t going apeshit crazy.

He gave a slow smile and pulled her back in, not hard for him to do, since she already had a grip on his shirt like he was her lifeline and she was going down for the count.

She cleared her throat. “So you showed up all Captain America to save the day, and now what? I jump into bed with you? Was that your plan?”

“Yeah,” he said, “but in my version we didn’t talk this much.”

“A full-service rescue then,” she said evenly.

He tried a cajoling smile. “I’m really good at full service.”

“Do you really think this is a good idea?”

He laughed softly and let his mouth brush over her temple and then her ear, which caused her to shiver. “Of course it’s not a good idea. Or we’d have gone for it already. But sometimes the bad ideas turn out to be the best ideas of all.”

“Yeah?” she asked. “Name one.”

“Bringing out your keys from the convenience store after the postcard display demolition.”

She let out a soft laugh and fisted her hands in his hair. “So what now? We really going to try this out?”

Were they? He’d promised himself he wouldn’t give her a chance to devastate him again. But somehow over the past few weeks he’d lost sight of keeping his heart safe and moved onto wanting to heal her heart. “I’m game.”

She hesitated so long he took a step back from her and prepared himself to leave. But her hand came out and gripped his. “You’re wearing too many clothes,” she said softly.

Lily’s breath caught when, eyes glued on hers, Aidan pulled off his shirt. He kicked off his shoes next and reached for the zipper on his pants.

“Wait!” she cried.

Aidan froze, shirtless, his thumbs hooked into the opened waistband of his pants, looking so incredibly hot that she started to sweat.

“We stopping here?” he asked, voice rough but in control.

He’d do whatever she wanted, she knew that. The question was what did she want—stop, or go on … Oh, who was she kidding. She’d had enough of the yearning and endless need. She wanted to go on. Bad. “Never mind. Carry on.”