Say the Word(90)



“I don’t know what we’ll do without him around here — Princeton’s in New Jersey. That’s nearly two thousand miles away!” Andrew added, as though I didn’t possess basic, elementary-level geographic knowledge about the location of our states. The moment was beginning to feel less like a conversation and more like a chess game between Sebastian and his father — each careful syllable a rook, each nuanced word a knight, sliding across a board of unspoken meanings and moving in for the kill.

“With you here in Georgia and my boy up north, well, it’d be a miracle if you managed to make something like that work.” The senator smiled happily, his white teeth so perfect I wondered if he’d had them capped with porcelain veneers.

“That’s enough,” Bash growled, reaching a hand across the space and grabbing my hand. With one sharp tug, he pulled me out from his father’s grip and settled me into his side. “We’re leaving.”

“But we’ve barely gotten to know one another!” the Senator protested, grinning at Bash and me with an uncomfortably excited glint in his eyes. “Don’t steal Lux away yet. We’ve so much more to explore.”

I felt the blood drain from my face as I watched Andrew’s eyes travel slowly down the length of my body, perusing my every curve with a blatantly sexual stare. Hoping for some kind of intervention, I turned my horrified gaze toward Judith only to find her staring impassively at the wall, a crystal tumbler of amber liquid clutched in her hand. She appeared completely uninterested in her husband’s actions — either she was well-practiced at looking the other way during his indiscretions, or she was so caught up in her own thoughts of glamorous gatherings and guest lists she failed to even notice his inappropriate leering.

“Come on,” Bash whispered, pulling me away. “Let’s go.”

“So nice to meet you, Lux!” Andrew called after us. I made the mistake of glancing back over my shoulder at him, and felt my stomach flip when he winked lecherously. “See you soon, dear!”

Sebastian led me to the kitchen and outside, walking at a brisk pace. His anger was apparent in each stride he took, his steps pounding against the grass at an unmatchable pace as we made our way down the sloping lawn to the tree line. The sun had set hours ago and there was a chill in the air — I shivered, pulling my thin cardigan tighter around my short dress and trying not to stumble on my flimsy, borrowed pumps. I wasn’t used to walking in heels and, as I stumbled over a stray rock on the path through the woods, I knew I’d never become the sort of woman who wore them every day. They were so impractical.

Guided by the faint glow of Sebastian’s cellphone, we eventually made it to the clearing. Bash pulled our wool blanket from the tree hollow in the giant oak. He spread the blanket across the grassy bracken and settled in, immediately pulling me down beside him. I lay across the blanket, my long hair spread out in the grass around me and my white dress glowing luminous in the moonlight. Bash rolled onto his side to face me, his head propped against his hand and his eyes on mine.

“Lux, I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “My father, he’s—”

“Shh,” I breathed, reaching a finger up to press against his lips. “Don’t.”

“The Princeton thing, it’s not definite. It’s just what he wants. And the way he looked at you…” Bash pressed his eyes closed at the thought and his upper lip curled in disgust. “I don’t know how to make this up to you, but I swear I will.”

“Bash,” I said, rolling onto my side so we were face to face. “Stop. There’s nothing to apologize for.”

“But my family—”

“So they aren’t perfect. Think about who you’re talking to.” I smiled at him. “The only reason you haven’t met my parents is because they’re always at the bar, or passed out drunk on the couch. ‘Dysfunctional’ is inscribed somewhere on our family crest.”

A small smile crept across Bash’s face.

“You aren’t your family. You aren’t your father,” I told him, leaning in to press a kiss against his lips. “I love you because of who you are — not because of them. You could’ve been raised by a troupe of con artists or circus performers and I’d still love you.”

“Yeah?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow at me.

“Yeah.” I kissed him deeply, twining my arms around his back and looping one of my legs around his waist. He pulled me flush against him, rolling onto his back so I was sprawled across his chest.

“You know what I think, Freckles?” he asked, his hands skimming down my back in a possessive gesture.

I shook my head.

“Babies have no say about which crib they end up in. I didn’t pick my parents anymore than you chose yours. I think real family is the family you get a say in — it’s the family you build with someone you love. And I know one day, when we’re married and you’re the size of a house, pregnant with my baby inside you…” His hands stilled on my sides as he stared into my eyes. “I’ll have made my real family. Our family.”

My heart fluttered in my chest and my eyes began to tear, but I forced a stern expression onto my face. “Maybe I don’t want babies with someone who thinks I’ll be the size of a house.”

Bash grinned. “Yeah, you do.”

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