Save the Date(70)

Even as I told myself that I probably wouldn’t sleep well—not with a dog on my legs and an assistant wedding coordinator next to me—I could feel my eyes drifting shut again and feeling my own breath start to fall into a pattern.

And the next time I opened my eyes, cool early light was streaming in through the room, and it was morning.





SATURDAY




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CHAPTER 16


Or, Nothing Is Wrong!!!




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I WOKE UP TO SOMETHING cold and wet pressing against my cheek. My eyes flew open, and there was Waffles’s blurry outline, his nose against my face, looking at me intently. “Jeez,” I said, wiping my face and scooting back against the couch cushions.

I put on my glasses and glanced at the couch next to mine, but it was empty, the blankets folded neatly and the pillow stacked on top of them. I reached for my phone to check the time and then remembered it was still dead. I’d just swung my legs down to the ground when Waffles looked up at the ceiling and started to growl.

I looked up as well, praying it wasn’t a huge spider—but there was nothing there. “What?” I asked him. But the dog was staring fixedly up at it, his eyes tracking something I couldn’t see, his growl getting louder. I watched him do this, wondering if this meant that, on top of a broken alarm, we now had a ghost.

I grabbed my sweatshirt from the floor and pulled it on as I walked across to the front hall, Waffles following at my heels. It was colder today than it had been yesterday—and I found myself wishing I’d brought some slippers with me as I continued into the kitchen.

I pushed open the door and saw Bill standing by the kitchen counter. “Hey,” I said, stepping inside.

“Hey,” Bill said, smiling wide at me. He was wearing jeans and a navy T-shirt with the green Where There’s A Will fleece I’d seen the day before.

“So,” I said, wondering how long he’d been up—he was dressed, after all, and certainly looked more awake than I felt. I just hoped I hadn’t kept him up, snoring or talking in my sleep. I crossed the kitchen to plug my phone in, and saw on the silver wall clock that it was just after seven. “How’d you sleep?”

“Not good.” This voice came from the kitchen table, and I looked over, startled, to see Max sitting there, hunched over. He had a long scratch on his arm that looked fresh—it was bright red.

“Oh,” I said, blinking at him as Waffles ran across the kitchen, ears flapping. “Um, are you okay? What happened to your hand?”

Max looked down at it, then immediately pulled his hand into his hoodie sleeve. “Nothing,” he said, too quickly. “I’m just . . . clumsy.”

Before I could ask for details, Waffles scratched at the door with one paw, then turned and looked at me. “You need to go out?” I asked, as though the dog were going to answer me. I opened the door and he tore into the backyard. As I closed the door, the alarm system let out three long beeps, then fell silent. “This is doing it when you close the door now?” I asked the kitchen in general. “What use is an alarm that goes off when you close the door?” I looked at the coffee maker, which was, sadly, both empty and quiet. And while I knew the basic mechanics of making coffee, I really wasn’t very good at it—something that was confirmed by people’s reactions whenever they drank the coffee I made. I headed to the fridge and pulled out a carton of orange juice instead.

“So, Max was just going to tell me something,” Bill said, widening his eyes at me as I crossed to the kitchen island with my juice carton.

“Is everything okay?” I asked, pouring my juice into a glass, even though I had a feeling it wasn’t. If everything was okay, Max wouldn’t be awake looking like he was about to throw up.

Max shook his head. “I think we have a problem.”

“That’s okay,” Bill said, giving him an I’ve-got-this smile. “That’s my job. I can fix any wedding-related problem as long as it doesn’t have to do with the weather. I have no control over the weather.”

“Can you make me a clergyman with a regular practice and a congregation?”

Bill paled. “Um. Maybe not.”

I just stared at Max. “Wait, what?”

“I thought it would be okay,” Max said, hunching down into his hoodie, like he was trying to disappear into it. “A lot of my friends have performed weddings, and all you do is sign up with this online church and you’re ready to rock and roll. My one friend Zeke did it on his phone as the bride and groom were walking down the aisle. It’s, like, not a big deal. And so, when Lin and Rod were talking about the wedding, I told them I’d be happy to do it—I mean, I was honored that they wanted me to do it. I mean, I’ve known them both forever, I introduced them—”

“Breathe,” I said. “Here.” I brought my still-untouched juice over to him, since on TV, whenever people were getting faint, they always seemed to be given juice. I figured it couldn’t hurt, at the very least.

“Thanks,” Max said, taking a gulp. I crossed back to the island and poured myself another glass, really hoping this wasn’t going where I had a feeling it was going.

“Okay,” Bill said, his brow furrowed. I could see that he was worried—though it seemed crazy that I’d be able to tell this after knowing the guy for just a day. But his voice was as cheerful and as ready-to-help as ever. “So you got ordained online, right?”