Saugatuck Summer (Saugatuck, #1)(98)
His thighs bracketed my hips and he jerked me down into another rough kiss. “Fuck me, Topher. Now.”
Nodding, I drew away to rummage through the bedside table. I tossed the lube on the bed before reaching for the condoms, but Jace snatched them from my hand and threw them somewhere out onto the floor beyond the bed.
“Fuck me.”
I stared at him, startled, but he just grabbed the lube and reached for my cock, slicking it, intent on his purpose.
“I love you,” I blurted out of nowhere when the motion of his hand had stilled.
“Well, of course you do.” He gave me a cocky smile, as if this was something I said to him every day, instead of for the first time. His eyes gleamed. “Tell me all about it later, or are you gonna leave me here holding my ass open for you all night?”
And just like that, there was laughter and joy. This thing wasn’t scary and I didn’t have to mistrust it. I could just celebrate it.
“Smart-ass,” I muttered, crawling over him. He chuckled, and it made him that much tighter when I pushed into him fast and hard the way he liked. Then there was no room for anything but panting and moaning and messy, openmouthed kisses where our tongues thrust at each other because we couldn’t slow down long enough to seal our lips together properly. He was hot and tight and just f*cking perfect in every possible way and God, I did love him and it was the most amazing thing ever.
Afterward, I collapsed, panting, atop him. My softening cock slipped out of his ass, wet and sloppy. Then he spoke again, stroking my hair while he caught his breath.
“Maybe you can get a two-bedroom apartment.”
“Why would I want to do that?” Yeah, postorgasmic Topher’s higher brain sometimes functioned just above that of Cro-Magnon man, okay? Gimme a break.
“So I can have an office.”
“You have an office at your place. Do you plan to spend that much time working when you come to see me?”
He blew a puff of air through his pursed lips, the breeze catching a lock of hair and blasting it away from his face. “Are you really gonna be that obtuse about this? Get with the program, angel.”
“What? Oh? Oh!” Startled, I blinked at him. “But don’t you need to be in Chicago?”
He shrugged. “Not all the time. That became pretty evident the past couple weeks. I would have to drive down once or twice a week to meet with clients, probably, and maybe sometimes stay down there short-term when I have another set or interior design gig, but it’s workable.”
“Allendale’s practically a cow town, you know. It’s pretty boring there.”
“Yeah, and we got clubs in Grand Rapids we can hit if we want to go out, or there’s Grand Haven, or Holland. Saugatuck’s only, what, forty-five minutes away if we want to hit the Dunes? And there’s no reason we can’t go party down in Chicago when we feel the need.” He chuckled, wriggling beneath me. “Besides, I’m pretty sure we can make our own fun.”
Overjoyed, I began to laugh. “Oh yeah. Oh, hell yeah!”
A solace is coming
On the summer winds
No pain or disaster
I promise love
—Casey Stratton, “I Promise Love”
With Michigan still dragging its heels and marriage equality now law in Illinois, Robin and Geoff decided to have their wedding in Chicago the next summer. Zhen wasn’t really old enough to be a flower girl, but she was walking by that point and pretty much drew all the attention away from the grooms. Not even my fabulous performance could compare. I was well and truly upstaged by a scene-stealing toddler.
I had to forgive her, though, when I realized she was warbling in something vaguely resembling the same tune I was carrying. She couldn’t speak, and she wasn’t even close to being on pitch, but her voice rose and fell when it was supposed to and she could obviously recognize and anticipate the patterns in the music and try to mimic them. Clearly, she was a natural. And will I be making a star out of her someday? You bet your ass I will.
During the wedding, Jace watched me speculatively, but he didn’t make any romantic offers, and truth be told, I was okay with that. I knew I wanted to be with him forever, but at twenty-two, I was still too young and immature for marriage. I figured we’d revisit the subject after I graduated and started my career, especially since I was pretty damn determined we were moving to Chicago once I was out of school.
I mean, let’s face it, I am just far too f*cking fabulous for a conservative midsize town like Grand Rapids.
I would love to be able to report that my relationship with my family was magically all better after the ordeal of Mom’s death bonded us together, but hello? Let’s get real. The fact is, I don’t have a damn thing in common with either of my sisters. Colleen is and always will be completely out for herself, for all that she does have the odd moment of likability. Tonya is a much better person, and I think if she could settle down, get an education, and stop partying so much, she might have a shot at a good life. But we’ll never be besties either. Tonya likes things low-key, and I’m just too much for her. She thinks that I’m melodramatic and self-involved and maybe she’s right. I don’t know.
What I do know is that if I am a self-centered drama queen, I’m not a terrible person because of it. I’ve pretty much lost my ability to let my family make me feel inadequate. I like who I am, even if I’m not perfect.