Room-maid(42)

He nodded. “I believe I have that in back. Let me go check.”

It occurred to me only right then that the website might have been wrong and this particular store might not have them in stock. I leaned against the counter, not knowing what I would do. Even if I found them online someplace like Zappos or Amazon, they would arrive after Tyler got home. And what if he wanted to wear them to work tomorrow?

I had started to work myself up into a frenzied panic when the salesman returned, shoes in hand. “We do have them. Can I ring these up for you?”

Exhaling pure relief, I said, “Yes, thank you.”

He scanned the shoes, opening it to show them to me and double-checking that they were both the same size. “That comes to one thousand and sixty-eight dollars and thirty-two cents.”

Did he just say $1,000?

All my frenzied panic returned an actual thousandfold. One piece of sheer panic for every outrageous dollar.

I mean, it was so out of my reach financially that it might as well have been $10,000.

It was sad to think that six months ago I would have thought $1,000 for a pair of shoes to be totally reasonable and it would have seemed an insignificant amount of money. Now it seemed like all the money in the world.

I should have expected this. I knew that Tyler’s clothes were expensive; it had been so long since I’d shopped somewhere upscale that it was like I forgot how much stuff like this could cost.

The problem was, I didn’t have $1,000. I didn’t even have an extra hundred. I also didn’t have any credit cards that I could use because they’d all either been in my parents’ names, or I’d defaulted in repaying them and the accounts had been closed.

This was too big of an ask for Shay or Delia. I wasn’t sure they could even afford it.

If I called Brad, there would be so many expectations and strings attached to him helping me that I’d never get him out of my life. And I just couldn’t be in debt to him. Not when things between us were over.

There was only one person I could call.

“That’s a little more than I was expecting,” I confessed to the salesman and his expression changed from someone eager to please to utter disdain. “Let me make a quick phone call.”

I pulled up my contacts and clicked on the number.

“Madison? What do you need?” my oldest sister asked. It was probably as much my fault as it was hers that she would assume that I’d call her only because I needed something.

And in this case, it was a totally accurate assumption.

“I need your help. My roommate’s shoes got chewed up and it’s my fault.”

“You chewed up your roommate’s shoes?”

“No. There’s a dog and she did it, but I’m the one who accidentally left the door open when he told me not to and the problem is that I have to replace them right away before he gets back and they’re like a thousand dollars and I don’t have any money.”

There was a long pause and I fully expected her to say no. To say, I told you so, or, What did you expect? To my surprise she said, “I’ll do this, but you’re going to owe me.”

“Yes, absolutely. Anything. Thank you, thank you, thank you.” That was how things worked in our family. Tit for tat. I would say I hadn’t expected anything less, but that would be untrue since I’d expected her to say no.

I turned to the salesman and said, “My sister is going to pay for it.” I handed him the phone and he took down the credit card information and was able to run it through the system. Another store probably wouldn’t have done so, but given that this was the sort of place that catered to the wealthy, they would do whatever their customers wanted.

Even the broke ones.

He gave my phone back to me and I said Violet’s name, intending to thank her for what she’d done, but she’d already hung up. I took the receipt and the shoes and started back for my apartment.

I was wondering whether Tyler would notice that I’d swapped out his old shoes for new ones when two people stepped in front of me, exiting a restaurant. I looked up and saw the sign. Yuto’s. It had been one of my favorite sushi places back when I could still afford it.

Boy, did I want sushi.

Feeling poor should have discouraged me from spending money, but I’d been finding the opposite to be true. When I had no money, I wanted to spend it more. It was an inclination I had to fight regularly.

Tonight I was tired of fighting. Tonight I just wanted overpriced sushi.

It meant I’d have to eat ramen for the rest of the week, but I was okay with that. I wasn’t going to order very much; I wasn’t all that hungry, given all the borscht I’d inhaled back at the apartment. This was definitely more of a symbolic gesture. I would just grab a small roll and eat it on my way back home.

I went inside and smiled with nostalgia. I’d forgotten how romantic the atmosphere was. Brad and I had had several dates here. There was low lighting and private booths. As I looked around, I spotted someone who looked familiar.

Blinking, I figured I had to be hallucinating. I checked again. Not my imagination. That woman over in the corner with a man who most definitely was not Tyler—it was Oksana.

Was she cheating on him? I had to call Shay right away. I got my phone out.

As if he knew I was thinking about him, a text came in from Tyler.



It was a picture of the Singapore skyline at sunset, taken from the restaurant I’d recommended. My pulse sputtered as the air solidified in my chest.