Room for You(56)

“Excuse me, what are you looking at?” His tone pulled me out of my daydream, with his accusing eyes dialed right into mine.

I looked away, flustered, and tried to find somewhere else to stare, anywhere other than back at him.

He walked up next to me on the shore, his eyes still on the kids as he leaned down and whispered in my ear, “Were you just staring at my body?”

“No,” I lied as best I could, but couldn’t stop myself from grinning.

“Mm-hmm,” he teased. “That’s okay, I was staring too. It should be illegal for you to wear a bikini out in public.”

My face heated for the third time in ten minutes as I grinned at him and turned toward the tree, seeking relief from the hot sun. I spread the blanket out and lay on my stomach, flipped my book open and started reading.

The breeze was coming in strong off the lake, blowing my hair in my face and flipping the pages of my book, making it hard to concentrate. I’m sure it also had to do with the fact that I couldn’t take my eyes off of Brody in the water, playing with my girls. Their giggles of pure joy melted me more than the hot sun ever could have.

“How’s it going?” I followed the feet standing next to me up to my mom’s smiling face.

“It’s not,” I sighed, closing my book, “I can’t focus and I need to get moving. My externship at the hospital starts in a few weeks.”

“And the externship is what again?”

“Basically, it’s job shadowing. The school placed me at Lake County Hospital in the ER. It’ll be a little bit of a hike but not too far.”

“Was the ER what you wanted?”

“Yeah, we had to put down our first three choices. My first was ER, second was Labor and Delivery, and third was anywhere but Psych.” I laughed. “I’m nervous because I’ll be working under a woman named Maureen, and from what I hear, she’s tough. I just want to do well.”

“You’ll be ready.” She sat down and patted my rear. “You’ve always been very responsible about your school work, I have no doubt that you’ll excel with this too.”

“I hope so. I graduate in less than a year and it’d be nice if I could land a job right away and get a little place for me and the girls.” I peeked at her out of the corner of my eye, nervous about her reaction to that last part of the sentence.

She nodded slowly as a tight smile crossed her lips. “I know. You need your own place. I’d love for you and Lucy and Piper to live with me forever, but that’s not healthy for you guys. You need to start your own traditions with them, grow your own family.”

“Okay, let’s stop talking about this before I cry. Maybe I’ll just build a house next door.” I laughed.

The thought of leaving my mom’s nest did make me sad. She was my security blanket, my protector, my hero. She’d taken care of us for so many years, I just hoped that one day I would be half the woman she was.

“What about him?” she asked, nodding toward the lake.

I looked out at Brody who had both Lucy and Piper on his shoulders and was marching around in the water.

“What about him?”

“Well, you’re talking about school and moving out one day. Does he fit in your future?”

“I don’t know, Mom. I hope so, but who knows.” I took a deep breath. “If you would’ve asked me years ago if I thought Zach and I had a future, I would have said yes. What do I know?”

“Zach was an immature jerk, Kacie. You deserved way better than him.” She looked at me knowingly. “The only good thing he ever did in his whole life was act as a sperm donor for my two precious grandbabies.”

“I know, but my point was that clearly I don’t always make the best decisions.” I watched as the girls innocently tossed handfuls of water up in the air and jumped unexpectedly when it landed on their heads. “But I look at them and think I’ve already screwed up so bad. There is so much that they are missing out on, I just don’t want to make any more mistakes.”

“Kacie, snap out of it!”

My head whipped toward my mom, who was looking at me like I was crazy.

“What?” I said defensively.

“Look out at that water again, and tell me what you see.”

“I see my daughters, innocently playing and laughing, not realizing how much their mom has already messed up their lives in their five short years.”

“Wow … pity party, table for one,” she scolded. “You need to look at the big picture, my dear. Do you notice that handsome man next to them? He’s looking down, smiling at them with all the love he would give his own children. And the best part is … he’s absolutely crazy about their mama. You need to let your past stay in the past and live in the now—Brody and the girls are your now. Please think about that.” She reached over and kissed the top of my head before she stood and walked back up to the house.

Damn mothers and their wisdom.





“How is this wrong? What does one wear to a … cake tasting?” I mocked in my snootiest voice while I stared down at what I was wearing.

Kacie cocked her head to the side, staring at me like I was clueless. “Brody, you’re adorable, but you’re dressed like you’re going to work out at the gym.”