Reign (Sin City Outlaws #1)(34)

“I… um…” It’s happening again. He’s making me lose my train of thought. My bravado fails, my lady parts wanting to do the talking. Guilt weighs heavy on my shoulders as realization bites at my conscious that I want Zeek to touch me. I want his rough touch, and hard eyes solely on me. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

He surveys the bookshelves on either side of my TV, randomly touching things.

“You like to read?”

I snort. “Doesn’t everyone?”

He looks over his shoulder at me, wearing a big, toothy grin.

“I see you like the sexy stuff.”

That’s my cue for my cheeks to turn red.

“I… um… I mean, it’s romance.” It’s smut. Porn, in short.

“This one is out of place.” He swipes a book off the shelf, and I inhale a sharp breath. My book collection is sacred; I don’t allow anyone to touch it. He turns, and I relax knowing it’s not a book I cherish. I only have books that I love on my shelf, ones I can re-read over and over and not grow bored of.

“Tattoos and piercings. What you need to know?” He reads the title aloud.

Stepping over to him, I snatch it from his grip.

“There was a time I thought about getting a tattoo, or piercing, yes,” I state, placing the book back in its place.

“Did you get it?” His eyes slide up and down my body unforgivingly.

“No. The department frowns upon that.” More like my dad frowned upon it.

He scoffs. “They frown upon a lot of shit.”

He plops down on my couch, his body shifted just right so he can still look at me. His eyes land on my chest again, and my nipples harden to the point I think they’re just going to jump off my breasts and hump him.

Shit, not where I wanted my mind to go.

I cross my arms along my chest, my body temperature rising rapidly.

“Take it easy, Rookie. I don’t have any expectations tonight. I’ve already crossed the line with what we did today, I don’t intend on making myself a hypocrite, and a traitor in one day. I just want to talk, and when I’ve said what I need to say, you can tell me to get the hell out.” My curiosity piques. If he’s not here to finish what we started earlier, what could he possibly have to say that is so important? I’m a little relieved yet saddened that he doesn’t want to ravish me.

“Alright,” I mutter, my hands still crossed in front of my chest.

Stepping around the coffee table, I try to sit on the far end of the couch, but Zeek is so big I pretty much end up right next to him. His body heat is radiating off him in waves, the smell of him poisoning my reason and reality. Regardless of why he’s here, this room is filled with sexual tension.

Jinx meows, running into the room, and Zeek instantly tenses.

“What the f*ck is that!?”

Jinx jumps on my lap, turning in a circle before falling on his side.

“This is Jinx, my cat.”

Zeek palms his face, his hand stopping at his chin as he stares at Jinx like he’s a mighty panther ready to strike at any moment.

“You can’t tell me you’re afraid of cats?” I nearly burst at the seams with laughter.

“No, I’m not afraid of cats. I just… I don’t see them much, so he startled me.” He shrugs, his body relaxing some.

It takes everything I have not to pick Jinx up and hold him in Zeek’s face, asking him if he wants to pet him.

“What did you want to talk about?” I change the subject, placing Jinx on the floor.

Zeek looks behind him, watching Jinx run off into another room. Yeah, he’s afraid of cats. I’ve heard many people are afraid of them, I just never met someone before who was, and I sure as hell never thought a biker would be.

“A lot, really.” His voice sounds strained. He scoots to the edge of his seat and rests his elbows on his knees, his head hanging in his hands.

Nerves strike in my chest again. “Like what?”

“I don’t know. The fact that I know messing around with you is going to get me toe-tagged, yet I still find myself thinking about the way you taste. The way your body would feel wrapped around mine.” He shakes his head, like hearing it out loud is absurd. “What the hell am I thinking?” he murmurs. Both hands pull at his hair in frustration.

His words make my heart rate accelerate. His confession that he thinks of me, that I can relate to the constant obsession of him swimming in my mind. He looks up, his face showing so much emotion.

I open my mouth to speak, but turn my head before something I can’t take back spills.

“If anyone saw us today it could not only get me killed, but you, too.” The words come out calm and collected, unlike the rest of him.

My eyes widen, and my heart stammers. “Why me? I mean, I could lose my job, but I wouldn’t be killed.”

He grunts. “Do you know anything about living as an Outlaw? If I’m screwing a deputy, my men are going to think you and I discuss shit. That would put them at risk, so they’d eliminate those involved.” My head is still stuck on him screwing a deputy—me.

“Tell me you understand what I’m telling you.” His voice comes off sharp, his eyes piercing mine.

I blink rapidly, trying to clear the sexual thoughts. What he’s telling me is nothing new; I know us being together is stupid for everyone involved. It’s not supposed to happen. An Outlaw and a cop together… it doesn’t happen. Yet here we are, defying the way the world works.