Redeemed (Dirty Air #4)(79)

“Chloe, listen—”

“Don’t give me the brush-off in my own bedroom. That’s awful.”

He grunts. “Don’t force me to.”

“I’m not asking for sex. I swear. I just want you here.” Because I miss you when you’re gone.

“No sex?”

“None. I’ll be a saint. I promise.” I offer him the sign of the cross, purposefully doing it wrong.

He corrects me like usual, a small smile gracing his lips. His hand brushes a loose strand of my hair away from my eyes. “You’re hard to say no to.”

“Then don’t bother trying.” I snuggle into my sheets.

It’s obvious that I won this round and he knows it. His iWalk thumps against the floor as he rounds the side of the bed. I smile at the rustling of my sheets on his end.

He goes through the motions of his routine, and I keep my eyes shut. The temperature in the room heats up as he settles beside me.

I take a peek in his direction. His body remains rigid as he stares up at the ceiling, his arms crossed over his chest. That will absolutely not do.

I roll over, throwing my leg over his without thinking. Every muscle in his body locks up as my thigh grazes his stump.

Shit, Chloe! “Oh, God. I’m so sorry, I wasn’t thinking and—”

His arms remain plastered against his chest, unmoving as if he was carved of stone. “It’s fine.”

“But I just touched you and—” I attempt to move back to my side of the bed.

Santiago’s hand stops me. He throws his palm across my thigh, securing me to his body. “Chloe. I mean it. It’s fine.”

“Like fine fine, or the fine your sister taught you.”

He lets out a soft laugh. “Fine fine.”

I snuggle into him, finding the perfect spot between his shoulder and neck to lay my head down on. My palm has a mind of its own, pressing against the cotton of his shirt.

I let out a sigh, finally content after a rough day.

“Chloe,” Santiago calls out.

“Mmm.” I fight to stay awake, but my body wants to drift back to that blissful resting place.

“Thank you for not running away, even when I give you every reason to,” he whispers. His words hang around us, filling me with a warmth I didn’t expect.

I run my palm across his chest in a soothing motion. “I’m not going to run away because you don’t feel comfortable enough to have sex with me. That’s stupid and such a double standard.”

“How so?”

“Because, if I felt similarly, I’d make you wait on purpose.”

“Why’s that?” Humor seeps into his voice.

“Because no man is worth my time if he isn’t willing to battle my demons with me.”

Santiago’s hand tightens around my thigh. His other hand snakes around me, tugging me closer to his body. “I’d slay them all for you.”

“Tickle dragons and all? Because those are some sly bastards.”

He chuckles before placing a kiss against my forehead. “I really like you.”

“If you like me, then promise me one thing.”

The blades of the ceiling fan swoosh through the air, filling the silence.

He answers after what feels like hours. “What kind of promise?”

“Don’t run away again. When things get hard, stick it out with me. I can’t help you fight whatever holds you back if you retreat at the first sign of trouble.”

“I will, but only if you promise the same.”

“Deal.”

We both fall into a comfortable quiet. Consciousness escapes me as I slip into a content sleep with Santiago by my side.





35





Santiago





I should’ve expected Chloe to join me on my trip to the racetrack. She didn’t bother mentioning how she called Noah and asked for the information herself so she could take the day off of work. I underestimated her commitment to seeing this process through, and now that we are here, I appreciate it.

Her presence makes the experience lighter. More manageable. It holds me accountable to make it through today, no matter how hard it gets. I don’t want to disappoint her. And most of all, I don’t want to disappoint myself.

Today isn’t about making my family happy, or even Chloe. It’s about proving to myself that I can get back out there. I can have the comeback I dreamed of if I only commit to the hard work.

A skeleton crew hangs around the test track. Noah stands off to the side, running through sheets of paper with James. Seeing my old boss and Noah working together again hits me differently than before. This time, it’s not about Noah’s racing or his competition. It’s about getting me in the damn car.

My eyes drop to the gray tarp with the Bandini logo. This is it.

A crew member drops a tire as my eyes land on them, and the wheel rotates in my direction.

Noah lifts his head at the noise and meets my gaze. “Look who finally showed up.”

I told him he didn’t have to come, but he said he wouldn’t miss this moment. It’s not as if I could tell him no, especially if he had a week off between races.

“I’m on time, asshole.”

James crosses his arms over his massive chest. “If you’re not early—”